How to handle my son's troubling far-right views and online influence

Rather than taking the view of some others that you should question his "high intelligence" and that he clearly lacks insight and empathy you should simply challenge his views with facts and rational argument?

That might make more sense?

You expect that he'll be able to argue 'very well' that Hitler was great and women belong in the kitchen? People on the thread have provided a lot of educational resources, I think the OP can go ahead and tell her 14 year old that Hitler was bad and his viewpoint terrible. Do you really think condemning him will drive children to the far-right and we have to tiptoe around Naziism as a result?!

This is very true, the pseudo liberalism so prevalent amongst the left is illogical bullshit that most ND people can see a mile off - the only option is to actually move a lot closer to the DSs perspective and slowly try and round off the edges

Or you could drop into conversation people like

the president of the International Olympic Committee Kirsty Coventry
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kirsty_Coventry

Zimbabwean cricketer Brendan Taylor
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brendan_Taylor

or the Mayor of Bulawayo, David Coltart
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Coltart

The reason those of us with connections with Zimbabwe are boggling at the claim that it's "all black" is that, apart from factually the country not being 100% of black African origin, white Zimbabweans still retain a lot of power and wealth and disproportionately occupy high-profile positions. So numerically they're a small minority but in impact they're a significant and visible part of the Zimbabwean population even in 2025.

It’s perfectly ok to tell someone compassionately that they’re wrong, why they’re wrong and why their views are unacceptable. And the impact of these kind of views on other people.

This does not have to shut communication down, but shift the discussion.

And what “facts “ would you be using to correct him? Unfortunately that tactic will only drive him further into the arms of the far right. It’s likely he could argue very well against your “corrections”

absolutely spot on !

I think it’s less important to engage with point by point and more to get a conversation going about ultra-conservatism and toxic masculinity. He needs context to all this because he’s not aware of the bigger picture of what he’s being influenced by.

Stop being "gentle" as you correct him, and read him the Riot Act instead. Have some strong principles and state them clearly, and tell him in no uncertain terms that his views are completely unacceptable. At least he would know where he stands in relation to you. It might be the wake-up call he needs. He sounds confused, and you are not currently helping him.

Keep the channels of communication open. Don't attacks his ideas or try to show him why he's wrong. Just listen and ask questions. Kids try on all kinds of personas and ideologies at this age. My kid wanted to be a Muslim, went on about it for some months - until I made an appointment for him with the local imam to talk about converting. That made it real. He moved on to soccer and Model United Nations.

As I mentioned in my comment above, I would focus less on challenging your son's views (at least, for now) and more on getting him offline and finding him some in-person communities that have a higher-than-average cohort of other ASD folk. Once he finds a group of in-the-flesh friends and activities, it will be easier for you to pry him from his admiration of Hitler.

Also, do be careful about challenging his views unless you are absolutely certain of your facts. Several posters above have scoffed at the notion that Zimbabwe is "all black" but if you try that with your ASD son, he will lose respect for you as - factually - the country is AT LEAST 98% black African (depending on what source you believe, eg it could be up to 99.6% if you with the country's most recent Population and Housing Census). As mentioned in my comment above, this is an opportunity for BOTH of you to become better educated on these matters.

OP, I just read this to DS of a similar age.
His response?
‘Bro needs to get off TikTok immediately’.
Maybe telling.

This is the problem!

I wouldn’t be gently correcting him. I’d correct him very firmly every time he spouts this stuff.

As others have suggested your son has a very narrow idea of Britain in the past. In the first half of the 1940s there a war on .... women went to work on the land, in the factories and the forces.

About his white supremacy thinking ... would you consider having a DNA test on him done? It may shut him up a bit if he finds out that he's various percentages of other races!

Where is this happening?
What about it is dangerous?

(I also have a son with some far right views so am reading the thread with interest.)

Could you try and get some advice from the PREVENT initiative?

Also can I make the point that most black and Asian British people who came to the UK post WW2 were not immigrants as they came from countries that were, at the time of their birth, controlled by the British empire. The rules changed and are quite complex, but, depending on date of birth and status of the country, people were either British subjects or British citizens.

And on your last point, he could start with Jane Eyre, a classic novel about a young working woman written by one of the three Bronte sisters who all worked in the 1800s as teachers, governesses and of course bestselling authors whose works have become highly influential and respected, appearing on exam syllabuses and reading lists everywhere. Maybe that would help him realise that a woman's place is not barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen!

If he’s very logical as many with ASD are, is it worth diffusing with comments like “I’ve never seen an 11 bedroom house on Rightmove” (as a “traditional husband” he’d obviously live with the kids and want them kids to have their own rooms with luxuries like game consoles) Ask him how many kids could fit in a car to go to school as dad will be at work so can’t do the school run etc. Someone with 10 kids wouldn’t get time to see friends, game etc as the kids needed parenting after work and he’d have to pa for cleaners, nannies and other help. The boy would have to be on a professional footballer’s salary to afford all that. If ds has his own room ask him how he’d feel about sharing a room with 3 or 4 siblings and having things like gaming time on a rota because there’s not enough space for everyone. Hopefully he can start to guess that giving your children is a good quality of life is often a deciding factor when choosing how many kids.

Wouldn’t ds prefer driving a sports car and having a life where he could do what he wanted? (the sports car thing is because it’s a sign of success in the manosphere but you’ll know if there’s a better suggestion like going on holiday 5 times a year or whatever)

If he loves history then you should start educating him about the history of the UK as a multicultural society. Does he know for example that black people have lived in the UK since at least Roman times? Does he know about the history of areas such as Bethnal Green in London, where immigrants have lived since the 17 th Century, starting with Huguenot refugees, followed by Jewish refugees fleeing from Russian and the Baltic states, with Bengali and Somali communities also established there in recent years.

If you can search out a book called The Peopling of London, it gives an amazing history of how a multicultural society evolves. If he really thinks that the UK was a whites only country in the 1950s then he isn’t as smart as he thinks he is.

And yes, get him of the internet, it is only feeding his ignorance.

The issue is, is that there is a massive problem with immigration, anyone with any amount of critical thinking can see this, however if people are faced with denial they will find people who also recognise the issue. Unfortunately the loudest on SM sell wholesale far right views and use an obvious problem to drag people into their ideology. Your son probably already feels “othered” with his ND so feeling not heard with his views he will be glad to find others that make him feel heard. Speaking as someone with autism, you do sad pens much of your time mimicking the social interaction of those round you with little understanding of nuance once you identify a group you want to be part of and you take things at face value.

I would say it’s important to remove him from SM, but you need some acceptance of his views by getting him to logically interact in discussions about them with more middle of the road views (don’t try and get him to interact with anyone with left views, maybe less extreme right wing views. It’s unlikely that he will be persuaded to move left, but that’s fine. If you speak with school about this it’s really important to make sure their views aren’t too left wing from the off as it will be too unsettling

If he is autistic and interested in the far right and Hitler, he might be interested to learn more about the Nazis' attitude to autism.
https://mjhnyc.org/blog/autism-and-disability-in-nazi-vienna/

@TheCatCushions
He also believes that we should go back to the 1940s where it comes to gender roles and women need to stay at home and men be the providers.

How do you respond to this?

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-03-31/liam-alexander-hall-possible-plea-flagged-alleged-terrorism-act/106515414

show this to your son and tell him he could be used