Page 5 | 10 month old DH said i am being lazy.

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 2026-04-10T22:18:13+00:00

When DD (10months) wakes, I change her and then give her milk. I then pop her in her playpen where she happily plays with toys. I then make a coffee and watch some TV - play pen is infront of TV (well TV in on wall, playpen is infront of couch). I sometimes just watch her and occassional look up at TV sometimes I will watch the TV. I enjoy having my morning coffee and she is happy playing. After 30mins / 1hr or so I then take her through to kitchen where I give her actual breakfast, porridge, yoghurt, etc. DH wfh and when walking past livingroom popped head in to say hi. He looks shocked thst I had a coffee and was lying on sofa watching TV. He asked was mummy having a day off and that the play pen isnt for me watching TV and that im being lazy. I was so annoyed. Is he right?

BlueMum16 · 11/04/2026 22:45

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 22:06

Well I made a real effort to cook and leave baby in livingroom with monitor. Dd had a 2 hour contact nap. I couldn't move. Then I followed her cue and when she was yawning. I though great let's have bedtime a little bit earlier tonight. Nope. Ive spent two hours soothing her. Shes sleeping on me no issues. Whenever put down in cot she is waking up. So I've brought her downstairs. Its 10pm, wide awake baby and now I'm grumpy.

Where's DH in all this? It might be easier for him to settle her if she's used to sleeping on you?

Why did you change the cot? Can you go back if she slept better previously?

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 22:31

MyLuckyHelper · 11/04/2026 22:11

Well whatever you do for gods sake don’t put the tv on
😂😂😂😂

Edited

Show quote history

Ms Rachel, ms rachel... where are you?!

OP posts:

Gardenbird123 · 11/04/2026 22:19

Nothing wrong with some independent play - I wish my babies had done this! Enjoy your coffee ❤️

MyLuckyHelper · 11/04/2026 22:11

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 22:06

Well I made a real effort to cook and leave baby in livingroom with monitor. Dd had a 2 hour contact nap. I couldn't move. Then I followed her cue and when she was yawning. I though great let's have bedtime a little bit earlier tonight. Nope. Ive spent two hours soothing her. Shes sleeping on me no issues. Whenever put down in cot she is waking up. So I've brought her downstairs. Its 10pm, wide awake baby and now I'm grumpy.

Well whatever you do for gods sake don’t put the tv on
😂😂😂😂

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 22:06

Well I made a real effort to cook and leave baby in livingroom with monitor. Dd had a 2 hour contact nap. I couldn't move. Then I followed her cue and when she was yawning. I though great let's have bedtime a little bit earlier tonight. Nope. Ive spent two hours soothing her. Shes sleeping on me no issues. Whenever put down in cot she is waking up. So I've brought her downstairs. Its 10pm, wide awake baby and now I'm grumpy.

OP posts:

Biscuit94 · 11/04/2026 21:56

BudgetBuster · 11/04/2026 21:56

😂😂 Sorry, I realised that afterwards when I read on but couldn't delete for some reason

Show quote history

No problem - honestly my brain is fried 😂😭

BudgetBuster · 11/04/2026 21:56

Biscuit94 · 11/04/2026 21:53

I agree... This was me quoting somebody else. Hence the quotation marks. It's a long story...

Show quote history

😂😂 Sorry, I realised that afterwards when I read on but couldn't delete for some reason

Imtornanddontknowwhattodo · 11/04/2026 21:55

Yes agree @ILoveFatFaceSocks to have a nice day out and leave your DH to see how hard it is. You deserve it :)

Biscuit94 · 11/04/2026 21:53

BudgetBuster · 11/04/2026 21:04

I coslept and contact napped with my son.
He had just turned 2 and sleeps a solid 11 hours at night alone in his own room now...

Meanwhile my best friend has a 6 year old who never coslept etc and guess what.. she gets up at 2am until 5 or 6am every single night.

Cosleeping doesn't cause dusregulated children. It saves many a mother from going absolutely insane.

Show quote history

I agree... This was me quoting somebody else. Hence the quotation marks. It's a long story...

Imtornanddontknowwhattodo · 11/04/2026 21:49

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Luckyingame · 11/04/2026 21:18

@ILoveFatFaceSocks
@Posner
You ladies definitely hit it off!
😁

RB68 · 11/04/2026 21:06

I think its time for him to have a Dad weekend - where are you off to?

BudgetBuster · 11/04/2026 21:04

Biscuit94 · 11/04/2026 20:15

"I'm not a nan I'm a much more recent mum and I've watched as all the mums who didn't let their baby ever fuss, co-slept, contact napped now have primary aged children who are crap sleepers, because no they never did get much better or learn to get to sleep by themselves. As a result their kids struggle to regulate their emotions as they are constantly shattered."

Show quote history

I coslept and contact napped with my son.
He had just turned 2 and sleeps a solid 11 hours at night alone in his own room now...

Meanwhile my best friend has a 6 year old who never coslept etc and guess what.. she gets up at 2am until 5 or 6am every single night.

Cosleeping doesn't cause dusregulated children. It saves many a mother from going absolutely insane.

Posner · 11/04/2026 21:00

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:54

Maybe in your own way. That's why i said you're alright.
Sorry for implying, we'll no, for saying you were mentally unwell 🙈🙈

Show quote history

Oh i missed that anyway!

one eye on tv!

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:54

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:51

No i was being genuine both in thanks and apology

Show quote history

Maybe in your own way. That's why i said you're alright.
Sorry for implying, we'll no, for saying you were mentally unwell 🙈🙈

OP posts:

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:51

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:48

Thats the equivalent of "I'm sorry you feel like that" 😂
Anyway, I'm sure we both have better places to channel our energy rather than sending unfriendly comments to each other.
Youre alright, Posner.

Show quote history

No i was being genuine both in thanks and apology

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:50

I spoke to him not long ago and he said when everything is laid out he sounds like a dick.

OP posts:

Skippinglightly · 11/04/2026 20:48

You and your DH may have an activity pattern mismatch. I like to be up and at ‘em from about 6am and then knock off and put the TV on at about 2pm. My husband has a relaxed coffee in bed then wants to sit down and talk about the day’s news for an hour after breakfast. He will be busy intermittently for much longer in the day than me. I cannot stand his way of doing things and he can’t stand mine, I see his need to relax throughout the day when there are things to be done as lazy and he sees my more driven approach until the days ToDo list is ticked off as ridiculous. I don’t know what the answer is, I just wonder if this is what is happening for you. We have a small business even though we are officially retired.

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:48

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:44

Thank you

x

and I’m sorry too if you haven’t liked my posts

Edited

Show quote history

Thats the equivalent of "I'm sorry you feel like that" 😂
Anyway, I'm sure we both have better places to channel our energy rather than sending unfriendly comments to each other.
Youre alright, Posner.

OP posts:

thepariscrimefiles · 11/04/2026 20:47

EndlessTreadmill · 11/04/2026 12:32

Personally I think it sounds incredibly lazy, but it's not the playpen part only, it's the TV part. Never in my life have I sat around watching TV during the daytime, there is always so much to do - TV is an evening relaxation or treat for me.

The idea that husband is working, and wife lolling around watching TV, not for 5 mins but for up to an hour, to me is quite shocking. I have also had 3 under 5.
I am very surprised that she plays on her own for that long, in my experience it was only a few minutes. But also, surprised that you manage to do all the tidying and cleaning in the house, look after your child as well as you can, do any shopping and errands, etc etc - and still have time to watch an hour of TV.

I've seldom read such a sour and misogynistic sentence as this one:

The idea that husband is working, and wife lolling around watching TV, not for 5 mins but for up to an hour, to me is quite shocking.'

OP's on maternity leave and she has been up half the night with her baby (her husband never wakes up) and she's watching TV while drinking a cup of coffee.

My ex-MIL never went out to work but spent her days finding unnecessary housework to do because she had to 'keep busy'. My first baby had two 2-hour naps each day and I did a lot of 'lolling around' reading and watching TV while he slept.

Curlydaisies · 11/04/2026 20:46

DalmationalAnthem · 10/04/2026 23:22

What's his packed itinerary and chores list when he is parenting by himself?

Exactly!

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:44

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:42

I'm sorry to hear that x

Show quote history

Thank you

x

and I’m sorry too if you haven’t liked my posts

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:42

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:41

Widow

Show quote history

I'm sorry to hear that x

OP posts:

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:41

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:40

So you are married or single mum?

Show quote history

Widow

Original poster

ILoveFatFaceSocks · 11/04/2026 20:40

Posner · 11/04/2026 20:36

2 kids. I just parented according to how I felt was right for them as individuals.
Yep, tv here and there.

had a playpen for eldest.
not for youngest as hated it.

husband and i on same page. Certainly he never name called and he wasn’t ever “going off on one” to me about salt content in bread I’d given, and then being as thick as a plank of wood by ordering her mac and cheese a week later

Show quote history

So you are married or single mum?

OP posts: