10 month old DH said i am being lazy.

It’s not easy. DD1 needed blackout, hairdryer noise (loud), tightly swaddled (up to 6 months). Then we had to sit in room till she went over. At nursery we had to get a blackout snooze shade for her buggy as she would never nap on her own.

It takes a lot of effort with some babies, but worth it when your kids just pop down to sleep (eventually). DD2 was easier in comparison, but still takes some dedicated effort. I just needed that brief hour or two of peace each day

Can you still get those bouncy walkers? Or the bungee bouncers that hang from the door frame? She might find those a bit more comfortable and fun during kitchen time than the high chair?

also there’s nothing wrong with you having your morning coffee and tv time to get yourself going. You are human! Have probably been up a million times in the night and had an early start. As long as baby isn’t watching the tv and you’re still talking to her I can’t see anything wrong with it! She’s still playing independently and you’re doing other things with her throughout the day

Sometimes I change my baby and then close the bedroom door and let her roam around while I lie in bed for an extra 20 mins. I guess as long as she's not interested in the TV (is she?) it's not the worst thing. An hour is probably a bit much though and I sort of get what he means...it seems a bit of a slippery slope. I have to be really strict with myself not to use screens around the baby otherwise in a few weeks I'd find myself endlessly scrolling...

Re kitchen - What's the long term plan? She won't be happy in the playpen/highchair forever. Think you've got to let her roam around and get to know the rules of the house a bit more. I normally open a few drawers for my kid and let her sort through them while I cook. I also normally make stuff that has limited hands on time (e.g. spend ten minutes prepping and then throw everything into a pan/the oven and come back and stir occasionally).

Yes, this sounds like incredibly lazy parenting. You have 1 baby and you leave her in a pen with the tv on for the first 1hr of her day so you can sit. Can't get much lazier tbh- at least you carry her downstairs in guess.

Zero screentime is recommended for under 2s. I've done 3 under 5, contact nappers so I know it's full on but she's not a tiny newborn, you can't just sit.

These are habits your setting her up with. Kids with more screentime are "fine", do you want her to be "fine" or 1, 2, 5, 10, 20% more than fine? Imagine an hour of tv everyday before school, the difference over the years.

Are you getting a bit confused between an hour and forever 🤔

It's not the 90s, can you even buy walkers anymore?

Honestly op don't. Listen to some of these responses. It's not good parenting to have a child that. Needs constant parental entertainment and can't survive in a safe space with toys for half an hour. This is why kids and teens are anxious and can't manage to be independent in any way.

Hmm trickier. How far is the other room? I’m assuming you couldn’t see her from the kitchen.

Is some sort of stagnate system across the kitchen or across the kitchen door so she is in an adjoining room possible and would make you feel more comfortable.

This.
Like it or not OP, your child is growing up, and needs to be able to roam. You can’t keep her locked in a pen for ever.

I feel a walker would be better than a play-pen at 10 months old. She probably does feel restricted in the play-pen and even more so in the high-chair for no reason whatsoever other than for you to cook dinner (usually kids go in it to eat!).

Time to open up your house for more movement.

I don't know anyone who gets up with their baby then watches their own TV programmes for an hour.. maybe 20 mins would be OK.

He hasn’t even cooked this baby a meal in 10 months? Time for daddy darling to step up. He sounds rather opinionated for someone with limited hands on experience….

@RaspberryRipple3 no, I’m saying that those of us who’ve employed nannies or use nurseries, generally want our kids looked after well. If the people looking after our kids were watching TV we wouldn’t be happy. Which suggests that watching TV isn’t not considered good parenting. I was asking OP to reflect on whether she would be happy for other people caring for her child to watch TV.

I would say fine for 20-30 minutes. An hour is pushing it, really.

If I were employing a nanny I’d be more worried it they thought is was a good idea to be entertaining my child 1:1 all the time and didn’t understand that sitting playing alone was important. sitting in a playpen for that is fine if it isn’t necessarily safe to not be in the playpen.

OP, does she need to be in the highchair while you are cooking. Is there somewhere else she could be playing by herself? Perhaps the playpen in the kitchen if it will fit. That might make her happier than being strapped in.

It's good for children to learn to amuse themselves. She has toys available and you are available if needed.
Tell him if he wants to do it differently he's fucking welcome.

I’ll be honest, whilst I enjoyed baby naps on me, I worked quite hard to get them napping in their room for my sanity. DD1 had colic and cried solidly for 12 weeks. naps were like handling an unexploded bomb (blackout blinds, hairdryer noise etc). I used Baby Whisperer techniques because that fitted my vibe. Gentle but firm.

it was hard work but my god, when they napped without me it was awesome!

OP if actual suggest somehow removing yourself from this post as MN will eat you alive for this, you will have hoards of women - who probably don’t even remember what it’s like to have a baby - tell you you’re failing as for some reason women seem to love to do this as it makes them feel great about themselves
baby seems fine, if mum is happy baby will for sure be fine. Keep doing what works for you x

What a stupid comparison. Are you suggesting the OP is paid staff? Should her dh be treating her like paid staff because he’s working and she’s on maternity leave?