10 month old DH said i am being lazy.

Honestly the hamster would do more parenting 😂

When do you get to shower or have a bath?
He's gone today to have a haircut and get some books... when did you last leave for a few hours alone? When he's WFH does he take his lunch hour and take over the baby (this is what my DH used to do when I was on Mat Leave.. he would eat his lunch and then give me 40 mins to myself - sometimes I did housework, sometimes meals prep, sometimes a shower etc).

Also pick certain days where he makes dinner or batch cook and you mind the baby, on the other days the baby is with him and you do dinner.

Woohoooo I won playpen Bingo 😂

One thing I will say is that when you become a parent, you grow a much thicker skin. I couldn't give a flying fuck what people think about my parenting choices (people always have something to say about breastfeeding into toddler hood, contact napping, cosleeping etc...). Everyone on Mumsnet will have different points of view because we all parent different.

Your biggest issue isn't if you have a cuppa while your child plays.... its why you allow your DH be such a complete and utterly lazy horrible manipulate prick?

I used to have mine in the carrier while cooking (or babygym). I know it makes life one million times harder but any screen time at that age is a negative. There are lots of studies on brain development and screen time in infants you can look at. But I know that most people allow it, so you will do what you are comfortable with

My 1st was like this, it was really hard! They were/are highly sensitive and any sort of sleep training would create hours of screaming and going in and out of the cot all the time. Always ended up bed sharing from 12, 1, 2 ..am or sth.
Then around 3 yo, she started sleeping through the night and now is such a good sleeper! There is hope!

🤣🤣🤭🐹

Shock horror - I am also child free! 😂

We'd never have guessed ... 🙄

I think I'd agree with this. I didn't vote because while I think the OP is allowed a break, and that her DH sounds like an absolute waste of space and a shite father, I wouldn't be a fan of watching TV for an hour with a child around awake. I 100% watched tv while my baby contact napped but I'm not a huge fan of the TV on even if it's not aimed at the baby. I have no idea why DH can't get up and allow the OP some time to chill alone after a rough night though.

There are some really horrible judgemental posts on here. Talk about giving the OP a kicking. You have the perfect lives do you? Grow up and get a life.

I think people are picturing a small playpen (like the collapsible ones, slightly bigger than a travel cot) whereas the fact you mentioned taking pieces out and that it's quite large I assume what you actually have are those big plastic fences? So really she is just on the floor playing and can't touch hazards as opposed to being lock away in a play pen

But not if it is always restrained in a play pen.

Actually, if OP is having a hot drink, I think the baby is safest in the playpen.

OP, HOW DARE YOU HAVE A MORNING COFFEE!!!! 🤣

Maybe it's the lying supine that annoyed your DH. Generally, spouses don't like to see each other relaxing, unless it's at the end of a long day!

@EndlessTreadmill

Don't worry - obviously us who dare to back the husband or share a different point of view are sanctimonious cows, whatever the first word means. (English is not my first language).

Shock horror - I am also child free! 😂

I agree.

And actually lots of children are now growing up unable to do it IMO.

Playing with toys in a playpen is perfectly ok when mixed with other activities - a walk to the park, a few stories on Mum's lap, bath-time with water toys, a nice crawl about when supervised. These are perfectly normal baby activities.

I personally don't like tv or radio noise going on incessantly in a house, and think babies do benefit from a generally quiet atmosphere, but it's only one hour that OP is doing it. There are lots of other hours in the day.

I agree.
It's the play pen I don't like. I never used one and neither did my daughter for her children.
They are much too restraining for a baby, why can't she explore her environment?
Having coffee and a bit of time to yourself in the morning is fine but why is the baby confined in a play pen for so long?
From your explanation of the day it doesn't sound as though she has much time to play outside the playpen.

I think the people that agree with DH are the ones that don't really agree with the TV. There is obviously nothing wrong with have a coffee break. The tv thing I wouldn't do, but I don't think it's a problem, really. I just don't really like TV in the day, more of an evening thing like someone else has said. If you're happy with what you're doing then keep doing it, there will soon be no hour break in the morning, trust me!

I'm kind of glad you have absorbed that Op because it actually tends to be the people who know least who are full of the theory.

Those at the coal face know it's messy and a case of trial and error.

Apparently Gina Ford who wrote those "guides to perfect mothering" or whatever they were called (Contended Little Baby, I think) had never had her own baby, and the reality of sleep deprivation and mastitis etc is a whole different story from an opinion on what to do with someone else's when you are wearing a starched apron and your undercarriage is wholly intact. That isn't to rubbish her ideas - I'm sure there is lots in it - but just to say there is a gap between theory and reality, and mother's instincts are useful too.

It's commendable that your DH has read books and seems to really want to do the best for your baby, but he needs to dial it down.