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Original poster

To tell/not tell family after cousin hit BF with scooter? Both don’t want me to

420 replies

Zanygreenan · 10/04/2026 20:25

I’m 21, my mum and dad are in Cancun this week for their 25th anniversary so I’m home alone this week. I invited my boyfriend, 23, round for a stopover tonight for a bit of company and my little cousin, 9, who lives on our estate one street away, popped in whilst playing out on his scooter with a friend.

We were sitting in the garden and my cousin was sat in a seat and got up for a drink and my BF sat in his seat whilst he was gone. Cousin asked him to move and BF refused and telling cousin and his friend to play somewhere else (with a mean tone). Cousin was angry that he refused to move and then hit BF in the face with his scooter. BF fell back out of the chair and then cousin hit him once more with the scooter and stamped on his wrist. I then managed to pull cousin off him and sent him in the house. Then I rinsed off the blood from BF’s face and then he sat down in the conservatory.

He has a massive headache and can’t move his wrist. BF doesn’t want anyone to know about the interaction and doesn’t want to go to hospital but he may have broken his wrist so I suggested it would be best to pop into A&E to check? Cousin has asked me not to say anything to his mum (my aunt) or my mum because he doesn’t want to get into trouble considering that he has already had a fight at school last year. Cousin is a nice boy overall but he doesn’t react well to confrontation and gets aggressive quickly and BF’s attitude towards him this afternoon topped him over the edge.

My aunt has just text me asking to walk cousin back to theirs as it’s starting to get dark out. I don’t know what to do as cousin is begging me not to say anything and BF also doesn’t want me to say anything either but if I don’t say anything it’ll look bad on me when eventually when his and my parents find out. I just feel like I’m stuck in the middle of an awkward situation.

What should I do?

OP posts:
DripDripAprilshower · 10/04/2026 23:32

Cousin is a nice boy overall

He doesn’t sound it!

MCF86 · 10/04/2026 23:22

So your boyfriend didn't want anyone to know he'd been unkind to a kid, and probably even more so that he'd been assaulted by one (because, ego).
Said kid didn't want anyone to know he is a dangerous thug. Obviously.

And you actually considered they might be good reasons to keep it quiet?! I don't think I've ever read a thread with a more obvious answer to it.

Blessedbethefruitloopss · 10/04/2026 23:16

No ambulance. Call non emergency number at most.

Tanyya · 10/04/2026 23:12

I hope you took bf to A&E and didn’t call an ambulance.
If he refused to go remember he is an adult - you’re not his mum. If it’s bad enough tomorrow he will go.

Your cousin needs psychological help.
if he does this age 9 - I dread to think what he will be like by 13 or even 16.

Pessismistic · 10/04/2026 23:09

Op it’s good you told his mum because it’s definitely not normal behaviour imagine if it was you who said something and he hit you. The kid needs to know he can’t hit out with no consequences and your bf is probably embarrassed having a kid hurting him like that as the hospital staff will ask him he will need to lie to protect your cousin but never lie to cover his violent behaviour.

Isittimeformynapyet · 10/04/2026 23:00

Abhannmor · 10/04/2026 22:50

Did you convince bf to get his head checked out? He could have a skull fracture or a brain bleed FFS.

She took him to A&E before 10pm FFS.

ScreamingBeans · 10/04/2026 22:59

Your cousin sounds like he's completely out of control. If this is how he behaves at 9, what's it going to be like at 15? 25?

He doesn't sound remotely like a nice boy, he sounds like a violent little shit.

Your boyfriend sounds like a bit of a knob as well.

They sound like a dysfunctional bunch to be honest.

kotordreams · 10/04/2026 22:59

Your cousin is violent thug and your boyfriend is a bullly (admittedly one who lost to
a 9 year old)

Your judgement about the males it is safe to spend with is seriously flawed and you may well get physically harmed if you don’t improve your boundaries.

MyBrightPeer · 10/04/2026 22:59

He’s not a nice boy actually. Hitting someone with a scooter is a crazy reaction to someone being a bit mean to you. Tbh, if I was your boyfriend, I’d end things now.

KimuraTan · 10/04/2026 22:56

Have you tried ringing Jeremy Kyle?

giddyaunt19 · 10/04/2026 22:56

Zanygreenan · 10/04/2026 21:49

My aunt popped round and I told her exactly what happened and cousin told his side. She was very angry at cousin and took him home but she wasn’t pleased at how BF treated him either.

I’ve popped into BF and his wrist has swollen a bit more and he can’t move it so I’ve told him I’m either going to call the ambulance or take him to A+E so we’ve decided to take him there.

And to everyone saying he isn’t a nice boy, he actually is. Having anger issues doesn’t mean he isn’t nice in general. He told me he was sorry just before they left.

Edited

He’s 9 and he’s done this?

good luck when he’s older. He sounds like a horror.

rockpaperscissors9 · 10/04/2026 22:55

Behaviour like your cousin has shown today is not a normal response. Your BF may have been being a bit of a dick by not moving and having an attitude, but the response by your cousin is so over the top and completely out of proportion!
You have to tell your Aunt, this is serious, his behavior needs looking at. You can’t ignore this.

Your BF should go to A&E, but you can’t make him. Not quite sure why he wouldn’t want to tell your Aunt either.

*edited because I’ve seen you’ve spoken to your Aunt- I’m glad to hear that.

Peclet · 10/04/2026 22:51

The 9 year olds behaviour is really very concerning. Do not minimise it.

Your boyfriend sounds pretty horrid too. Who is shitty to a 9 year old???

Listlostlast · 10/04/2026 22:51

BudgetBuster · 10/04/2026 21:57

It doesn't particularly matter if he's sorry. He's 9 and extremely violent... he isn't a nice boy. You do realise that he could have smashed your BFs head in causing serious brain damage or death had he not stopped at two hits.

Also... has someone contacted your cousins friends parents? They need to know their 9yr old witnessed a violent attack.

Glad your BF is getting seen to.

Show quote history

This. What a shitshow. I’d not even considered the other child, but it’s a very good point, I’d be horrified if my son had been witness to such an attack and would certainly want to know about his friends behaviour. He sounds incredibly dangerous to be around if so little pushes him over the edge and attacking a child his own age could end in truly dire consequences.

Abhannmor · 10/04/2026 22:50

Did you convince bf to get his head checked out? He could have a skull fracture or a brain bleed FFS.

EstrellaPolar · 10/04/2026 22:48

OP, you’re still so young. Please don’t stay with your boyfriend if he has anger issues, just because he can be nice also.

Some people aren’t a “child person”, but they should definitely be a “people person” in all social situations and manage their emotions regardless of the ages of those around them. Even if your boyfriend isn’t great with kids, there is absolutely no reason why he should be rude or mean to them…

BudgetBuster · 10/04/2026 22:47

Uhnoseriouslyy · 10/04/2026 22:35

Your cousin shouldn't of hit your boyfriend. However it's his reaction as your boyfriend refused to move out of his seat. I can see why your cousin did it. But doesn't make it right.

I'd be reconsidering your relationship with your boyfriend. He sounds nasty.

Majority of 9yo boys I knew would have gotten upset and close to tears from the BFs attitude... I don't know ANY child who would instead pick up a scooter and proceed to batter an adult and need to be dragged off them!

The BF might not have the best attitude... but in no way did he deserve to be violently ssaulted.

BMW6 · 10/04/2026 22:44

Your "lovely" cousin is going to end up in prison the way he's going. With luck he won't actually kill someone to achieve it.

WeeHighlandCoo · 10/04/2026 22:42

Sorry I beg your pardon?
A 9 year old child seriously assaulted a fully grown adult with a weapon so badly they need medical attention, all because an adult said something they didn’t like…and you just sent him inside even though you know he has history of behaving like this?
Kids are strong! Jesus Christ, you need to tell someone so both your BF and this kid can get the help they both need, and stop your cousin before his temper kills someone… 🤯😕

ImFinePMSL · 10/04/2026 22:41

Tell your cousins parents.

& Tell your boyfriend to not speak “in a mean tone” to a child again. Especially since it wasn’t even your boyfriend’s house. What a knob.

Nearly50omg · 10/04/2026 22:40

Uhnoseriouslyy · 10/04/2026 22:35

Your cousin shouldn't of hit your boyfriend. However it's his reaction as your boyfriend refused to move out of his seat. I can see why your cousin did it. But doesn't make it right.

I'd be reconsidering your relationship with your boyfriend. He sounds nasty.

So because an adult refused to move it’s perfectly acceptable to beat him up with a SCOOTER and break his wrist?!?!! What’s wrong with you??!!!

Uhnoseriouslyy · 10/04/2026 22:35

Your cousin shouldn't of hit your boyfriend. However it's his reaction as your boyfriend refused to move out of his seat. I can see why your cousin did it. But doesn't make it right.

I'd be reconsidering your relationship with your boyfriend. He sounds nasty.

PyongyangKipperbang · 10/04/2026 22:31

Velumental · 10/04/2026 21:51

What are your boyfriends redeeming qualities?

Show quote history

Well quite.

This is a "who is more wrong" situation. BF is a total arsehole, and cousin needs help to manage his anger. However, as cousin is 9 he is less culpable.

Suspect that BF didnt want OP to say anything as then he would have to admit to being beaten up by a 9 year old.

ThatLemonBee · 10/04/2026 22:30

You need to tell , that not normal behaviour for a 9 year old , o have one at home and she wouldn’t think about being this violent ! Is this normal for him?

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 10/04/2026 22:28

I would tell the parents but maybe not immediately today or in front of the child. Find a good calm moment.

Id have gone right off the boyfriend. I can’t abide adults teasing child - or any
teasing really but this especially. Sounds like BF was trying to feel like a big man by asserting himself over a child.

It’s very troubling that your cousin
acted with such extreme violence but wouldn’t be able to look at the boyfriend in the same way.