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AIBU?

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AIBU to ask DS16 to wear lighter clothes in spring

56 replies

happyandhealthy4 · 09/04/2026 22:26

It's spring and it's getting warmer, yet DS16 is still dressing in a black puffer jacket and black tracksuits. I've been telling him to stop wearing dark clothing at this time of year like a gangster but he is refusing to listen. AIBU to tell him to wear different clothing?

OP posts:
UniquePinkSwan · 10/04/2026 08:48

My DS is like this. Wears jumpers and jackets in the height of summer. He has autism so I’m assuming it’s a comfort/sensory thing

Maray1967 · 10/04/2026 08:47

coolcahuna · 10/04/2026 08:39

Nah, won't work until they realise ! My 17 year old has just realised shorts are alot more comfortable in the summer as are white t shirts but he had to get there himself!

Yes, same here. DS18 appeared in shorts last summer for the first time in years. We both stared at him in shock.

Funnywonder · 10/04/2026 08:46

Pizzahncher · 10/04/2026 08:44

I'm 40! When I was 16 I wore a thick white puffer jacket with Hooch plastered all over it with a massive hood and a fur trim. I wore it everywhere in the blazing sun 🤣 including sitting on the beach with my CDs falling out my pocket (yep, sandy CD's)

It even had two dangly white Pom poms for good measure.

Don't worry I'm neither a drug addict or a gangsta 🤣

Edited

This really made me laugh🤣🤣

loislovesstewie · 10/04/2026 08:46

Apparently it was minus 2 last night where I live, factoring in wind chill. It was flipping cold yesterday evening too, I had the heating on. It might be April, but it's not warm everywhere. Leave the boy be.

Pizzahncher · 10/04/2026 08:44

I'm 40! When I was 16 I wore a thick white puffer jacket with Hooch plastered all over it with a massive hood and a fur trim. I wore it everywhere in the blazing sun 🤣 including sitting on the beach with my CDs falling out my pocket (yep, sandy CD's)

It even had two dangly white Pom poms for good measure.

Don't worry I'm neither a drug addict or a gangsta 🤣

Funnywonder · 10/04/2026 08:43

Aw, leave him alone. His clothes are his security blanket, particularly if he’s wearing the same ones day in, day out. I’m sure he’ll take his puffer jacket off if he gets too warm.

Mind you, my eldest has ASD and used to struggle to dress for the weather. In primary school, he would wander out in his polo shirt in a blizzard, yet in summer he insisted on wearing the full sweatshirt and coat ensemble. He’s 17 now and sticks his head out through the back door to check if it’s cold, so he finally got the memo😆

Zoraflora · 10/04/2026 08:41

I would let him wear whatever he likes. He is 16.
Does he have lighter clothes in his preferred colour. If not, I would offer to buy some if he doesn’t have his own funds.

OhBettyCalmDown · 10/04/2026 08:40

Why are you telling him what he should wear?!? Beyond making sure small children and vulnerable people are dressed appropriately for the weather you shouldn’t be telling anyone what to wear.

coolcahuna · 10/04/2026 08:39

Nah, won't work until they realise ! My 17 year old has just realised shorts are alot more comfortable in the summer as are white t shirts but he had to get there himself!

BauhausOfEliott · 10/04/2026 08:37

Firstly, he’s 16, not 5. Let him wear what he wants. He’s almost an adult FFS.

Secondly, it’s not the 1950s and there are no rules for seasonal colours any more.

somanychristmaslights · 10/04/2026 08:36

You’re expecting a 16 year old boy to listen to you about what he wears?? That’s made my morning 🤣. All the lads round here are always dressed in black, as others have said, pick your battles.

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 10/04/2026 08:35

You've got to be kidding right? I wear black all year round, I look good in black. It's really got nothing to do with you what he wears. Leave him be.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2026 08:34

A couple of years ago I was out one evening with a group of my vintage Goth friends - black is our standard - suitably tailored for mutton, not lamb. We started getting heckled by a group of young scallywags outside McDonalds, with the usual funeral / Halloween epithets. On turning round, the group were themselves clad entirely in the black uniform described. Obviously the irony was lost on them, but it gave us a chuckle.

NoraLuka · 10/04/2026 08:34

I’ve put YABU because wearing unsuitable clothes is part of being a teenager, don’t waste your time fighting it. There’s nothing you can do apart from making sure he has money to buy different clothes if he wants to.

Back in the day it was wearing sparkly vest tops/football shirts even in the negative temperatures, now it’s puffa jackets in spring. Just wait a few years and he’ll be wearing the t shirts and things!

Nannyfannybanny · 10/04/2026 08:27

It's the fashion init! My 14 year old dgs lives in black,mind you,he hardly wears a coat, I spend all my time asking "aren't you cold". His 16 year old sister has actually bought a couple of white items of clothing recently

Mogbiscuit · 10/04/2026 08:25

Forget it OP, he's a teenager and therefore needs to wear a black puffer jacket at all times.

MagpiePi · 10/04/2026 08:23

I had a friend whose teenage son would only wear white. Their washing machine was forever on the go.

I let my kids choose their own clothes as soon as they had their own opinions. Pick your battles!

ValidPistachio · 10/04/2026 08:11

He's 16. Would you allow him to dictate your outfit choices?

TwoShades1 · 10/04/2026 08:09

Aside from ensuring that he has access to some suitable clothing for warmer weather, it’s really up to him what he wants to wear day to day.

socks1107 · 10/04/2026 08:03

I’d leave him be: he’s 16 it’s up to him what he wears and if he’s hot that’s his fault

Hollowvoice · 10/04/2026 07:54

Seriously?
My DC are a bit younger but it's been years since I could last "tell" either of them what to wear! I can suggest they might be a bit hot/cold in their chosen outfit but there's no "telling"

Lomonald · 10/04/2026 07:54

One of mine was emo.at 16 lighter clothes was maybe taking the black hoody off , honestly just leave him to wear what he wants.

Sartre · 10/04/2026 07:51

Leave him alone. My 16 yo DS wears black 24/7, I don’t think I’ve seen him in another colour for years. I don’t mind because I’m similar!

Catza · 10/04/2026 07:49

This reminds me so much of my mother...
OP, I'm a 42 year old woman and wear black all the time. Yes, this includes workout clothes. It's also way too cold for me just yet to change from my big black puffer coat. I would like to think that I do not look like a gangster.
My mother still hates black but, luckily, she long stopped telling me what to wear.

FloralDeerPattern · 09/04/2026 22:57

I gave 16 yo dd some money to buy some summer clothes this week and she came home and said that she avoided buying black and just bought some bright colours for a change. This girl wears her black puffer and dark tracksuits all the time. She came home with colourful little vest tops and tshirts, denim skirts and shorts and some white trousers. There is some colourful light at the end of the tunnel but you have to let them get there themselves.