AIBU to hate what's just happened at work?

Your manager us an arse. He needs feedback on how to improve, sounds like 'jobs for the boys' culture. Personally, I'd reply to the email (in a week's time) to that email, ccing in senior managers.

This. No apologies or detail about who sent it to you- that someone did shows senior people see your value and see through Steve, and if he asks say I’m not going to be walking through who sends me what. It’s enough for you to know that someone saw that and thought I should know about it.

Can you ask the person who fwd to you too raise it? Or "reply all" and point out you've been ignored.

Don't let it drop

I think Steve is positioning Paul internally given he is new. It was not about taking credit away from you.

I think you are just going to have to level with him. Say it has got back to you via a concerned and quite annoyed colleague who shall remain nameless that you appear to have been completely sidelined/ignored instead of getting the recognition you deserve. Just make the point calmly that you understand why he wanted to acknowedge Paul, who is new and so far doing a good job, but it shouldn't have been at your expense and he could just as easily have included both of you in the email. Especially given that Paul's input has been minimal in comparison to yours.

He should be more mindful of how this sort of thing appears in future. After all, it's not you that chose to pick up on it. It's a mutual colleague who has observed this and brought it to your attention because it feels unfair and unprofessional.

OK, that's not on. Can I suggest that you don't say "I won't work these hours in future", though?

That's your decision to make, I am not saying you should work those hours. But I think in this email it will sound sulky and it doesn't need to be said. Tactically in this email I would simply say: you know I led this project, you know I worked long hours to make it happen, you know that the work to get Paul up to speed and in a position to make a contribution was mine, and I am very disappointed in view of our longstanding professional relationship that you took the time to reference his contribution to this project to the SLT without in any way acknowledging my actual leadership of it over [x] period. I am aware that someone else on the SLT did flag my leadership of this project but am surprised and disappointed that you as my line manager did not do this in the first place."

This is pathetic and an example of men helping men in an organisation.

I would forward the email to Steve (removing where you got it from) and just say WTF!!!

That's all you need to do.
Then wait for his pathetic attempt to suck up to you.

☝️ and what about saying to Steve, “it has been brought to your attention” and it unfairly reflects on you and your team that a single person was praised for the work.
Call him out on it but do it dispassionately.

Women will always be disparaged for being emotional when raising issues.

Good for you. I'd copy someone senior in on the email. Need a paper trail of the blatant sexism. It def sounded like Paul had arrived to save the day. If your company is worth it's salt it wont want good people like you walking away because a man has found himself a wee man pal to promote.

Paul was only brought in to cover 1/3 of the project whereas OP was (I assume) 100% so that's a huge difference in effort.
I'm not saying that justifies 12 hour days btw

The patriarchy is alive and well.

Yanbu, how infuriating.

Really the senior manager needs to take this up with Steve if they thought it was off.
I also think you are a bit of a mug doing 12 hour days while Paul is merrily doing his 9-5.

This isn’t a bad idea. Although I’d not use it to show off and be passive aggressive,

but an email to the team, copying senior management, thanking everyone for their efforts, call out a few team members for praise, mention their contributions, I’d not mention Paul at all. And don’t say whay you did. It won’t go down well. Just congratulate everyone on a job well done and a project delivered successfully.

I wouldn't even bother going to chat to Steve. Nor mention that you'd seen the email. I'd draft an email to everyone saying now that the project has been launched, I'd like to, in my capacity as project leader, talk about how the project development went, what we can all learn from it, how I managed it, how we managed to successfully integrate the newcomer (Paul) and if anyone has any questions, please let me know, and what we think we can do better next time.

I agree. Why aren’t the senior management, who were sent this email, calling him out?

"Paul was thanked for his leadership, organisation and diligence" This makes the email even worse, as it could be read as suggesting that Paul had to come in and take over as leader and a clumsy, veiled swipe at your leadership.

I'd definitely send out an end of project thank you email as project lead. I'd also take this up with Steve and consider taking this higher / to HR if he is not willing to correct the impression he has given to senior management. I would also be looking for other positions.

That’s not disingenuous, that’s passive aggressive and unprofessional.

That’s not disingenuous, that’s passive aggressive and unprofessional.

Personally I wouldn't say I was disappointed the way it was handled as that is attacking Steve. I would wrap it up in concern for Steve and the optics of looking biased towards Paul.

I would say something along the lines of you were surprised firstly not to be copied on an email to a member of your project team praising their efforts. (even if you are both the same level, you are the project lead). But you are concerned for Steve that this may look like favouritism (or discrimination) to some people, as you know several people who have done a fantastic job and helped the project, but they have not been mentioned.

I think I'd have a word in person with Steve. I wouldn't do this over email. Easier to say face to face, I just wondered why you'd acknowledged Paul's work and not mine in that email, so thought I'd better check in and find out whether there was a reason for that.

Put the ball in his court to explain why he didn't acknowledge you. Although I'd put money on it being good old-fashioned boys-own misogyny.

This is exactly what I would do.

Why hasn’t that someone who emailed it to you cc’d you into the email, expressly asking why you haven’t been acknowledged?
id go and see your boss, and just say I’d like it putting out there that I don’t appreciate people coming to me, telling me that you’ve publicly acknowledged the great job he’s done and clearly sidelined me.
its nice to know that besides doing the majority of the work on the project, i also made sure he was upto scratch on the job role he’s been doing, besides doing my own job, so thanks, i now know how valued I am as a team member.
walk away then and let him stew!

This is a great suggestion, as it corrects the false narrative given to senior management and makes Steve look silly for not having acknowledged you in the first place.

The only thing I’d be concerned about it is that is doesn’t help you to address Steve directly, and may cause him to treat you even more unfavourably. If you decide to do this, perhaps meet with Steve after you have sent the email. Could go either way, but I really do like it!

If Paul was Paula people would be speculating about an affair and favouritism arising from that. Gay men can and do also operate in this way, just saying…

Wow, apparently sexism at work is not only alive, it's doing great!
I'd probably start quietly looking for a new position somewhere else.
I don't think you can change the culture within the workplace. It could only backfire.