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AIBU?

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Shocked by what my BF did to me

212 replies

Catchase1 · 09/04/2026 19:17

This happened at the weekend but has kind of dragged on to the week. I don’t live with my boyfriend but we’ve been together a few months and we spend every other weekend at one of our houses. We were at mine this weekend just gone. We have a quite ‘jokey’ relationship and banter a lot. On Sunday, he hovered over my face (having taken his shorts down) and broke wind. I was in bed on my phone at the time. I went mad at him and he kept defending it as a joke and says that I always joke about doing it to him. I said yes, a joke. I’ve told him I want space, he has attempted to apologise over messaging and asked to call me. I just feel like it’s a line crossed even if it was done purely as a ‘joke’. Is it me or is that the ultimate disrespect?

OP posts:
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Hohumitsreallyallthereis · 12/04/2026 10:09

rwalker · 12/04/2026 08:44

Did you miss the bit where she said she would do it to him

Yes hence why I questioned her “banter”.

Megifer · 12/04/2026 09:54

rwalker · 12/04/2026 08:44

Did you miss the bit where she said she would do it to him

She didnt do it though.

TittyGajillions · 12/04/2026 09:39

rwalker · 12/04/2026 08:44

Did you miss the bit where she said she would do it to him

Obviously she didn't miss anything, read it again.

rwalker · 12/04/2026 08:44

Hohumitsreallyallthereis · 12/04/2026 08:12

I’d dump him and also seriously think about what adult “banter” should be like because it’s not joking to fart in someone’s face. Grow up!

Did you miss the bit where she said she would do it to him

The13thFairy · 12/04/2026 08:17

I can't understand how you would joke about doing this. It's not funny. It's utterly gross.

Hohumitsreallyallthereis · 12/04/2026 08:12

I’d dump him and also seriously think about what adult “banter” should be like because it’s not joking to fart in someone’s face. Grow up!

NeedingASafeSpace · 12/04/2026 08:06

So, OP, did you forgive him for the fart?

Daisymay1000 · 11/04/2026 21:09

AStonedRose · 09/04/2026 20:28

It's sexual assault.

Dump dump dump

Sexual assault hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. It’s a bodily function. Don’t pretend u don’t let rip 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Dersie · 10/04/2026 19:32

Its one thing joking about it, and whole other thing to act it out.
Bin him, it reeks of disrespect, excuse the pun

ChampagneLassie · 10/04/2026 08:40

I remember my ex once farted in bed and trapped me under duvet. He thought this was hilarious. I was really upset. I made my feelings known and we moved on but we were married and owned a house by that point. If it had been early days that might have been if for him. And I think what your fella did was worse. BUT you encouraged this with your jokes about it.

Megifer · 10/04/2026 08:38

Id expect a young child to be all confused and not know where to draw the line between a joke and actually doing it, not an adult.

Naunet · 10/04/2026 08:33

JillyGiraffe · 10/04/2026 06:07

This! It’s absolutely disgusting, but YABU! You can’t ‘joke’ that you’ll do something to him and when he actually does it tell him it’s a line crossed. Forgive him and ‘banter’ a little less..!

Of course she bloody can. Saying something and doing something are completely different. I bet you've said in the past comments along the lines of "I'll kill him when I get my hands on him" - humans with functioning brains realise you do not mean this literally.

katepilar · 10/04/2026 08:29

Has he just attempted to apologize or did he actually apologize?

I find you talking about doing it to start with is weird so its difficult to judge where the two of you really are re gross jokes.

EverythingGolden · 10/04/2026 08:06

How is the relationship otherwise? I wouldn’t personally end a relationship over this, especially in the context of him having got a bit carried away with the ‘banter’ and realising his mistake. But something has obviously crossed the line pretty seriously for you OP so there may be other things going on here that this is not so out of character?

Manicmondayss · 10/04/2026 07:53

Those types of relationships where you prank each other sounds so puerile. I’d definitely dump him but it seems you enjoy that kind of stuff. He obviously went too far but seems sorry.

ScrollingLeaves · 10/04/2026 07:41

AgentPidge · 09/04/2026 19:20

It's in really poor taste but it sounds as if he doesn't know where you draw the line. If he's apologised and learnt his lesson, I'd forgive him.

I think this too about him not knowing where to draw the line, especially as you wrote he said that,

” that I always joke about doing it to him”.

I wouldn’t be able to stay with him though. This whole ‘bantering’ relationship you have together seems a bit uncomfortable, superficial, and lacking in real emotional intimacy, and lacking in respect.

Els1e · 10/04/2026 07:30

For me, he's not a keeper. But if you generally enjoy the 'banter', then just let him know this was beyond a line

curious79 · 10/04/2026 07:16

There’s no coming back from this one

blubberball · 10/04/2026 07:14

I just wouldn't want my relationship to be like an episode of Jackass. Nah

Pricelessadvice · 10/04/2026 07:07

I find farts funny, but this knocked even me sick!
Gross.

LaughingCat · 10/04/2026 07:04

I mean…it’s classic Family Guy-style humour. These threads come up on Dutch ovens/farting on or at the OP every so often. People fall into two camps: utterly horrified and couldn’t care less. Neither one gets the other. Neither are wrong - but if you care and your fella doesn’t @Catchase1, you’ve now made it clear what your boundary is. Agree to disagree now, no harm that the joke fell flat, but if he does it again then that would be disrespectful as he now knows your feelings on it.

OhWise1 · 10/04/2026 06:59

If you joked about doing it to him, how is he supposed to know it is beyond the pale? You have told him and he apologised
Tbh though you both sound as grim as each other!

catipuss · 10/04/2026 06:54

School boy humour (from you too) how old are you both?

thewonderfulmrswatson · 10/04/2026 06:52

he's a joke more like. Immature prick.

MyDeftDuck · 10/04/2026 06:44

What a vile, disgusting thing to do!
Ask your BF if he would be happy for you to wipe his face with your soiled underwear………..what he did to you was equally as gross!
There would be no going back for me, he would be history!