AIBU to be angry my sister left my 16-year-old alone?

Actually on a re-read I think your sister should have stayed. It must have been annoying for her friends to she b had to see your dd home, it wasn't their responsibility.

It's fine. I would have stayed if it was my niece just to have been there, but if she sees your sister often I understand why she didn't.

I’d understand if she was 6, but not 16. She’s 2 year off adulthood. You’re definitely being unreasonable and need to give her some independence and help her with life skills.

YABVU. I know many 11 year olds ago who travel in and out of London every day for school, lugging back packs that weigh more than they do, for extra challenge!

Your Dd really should be able to cope with finding a map on her phone and retracing her route.

Maybe you could help her/spend some of the summer holidays getting her to plan and navigate a few day trips with you or with friends to boost her confidence?

A lot depends on the specific 16yo, but it sounds like it might be miscommunication, or just a difference in expectations, between your sister and your daughter.

I think it's probably normal and even preferable that your sister didn't stay and sit with them while they were talking, but it seems strange that she and your daughter didn't discuss what would happen after the meeting - for example, if sis was going off temporarily to run some errands, daughter would call her when ready to meet back up? Or, if sis planned to go on with her day on her own and expected daughter to make her own way home after the meeting, wouldn't she have at least said goodbye, see you again soon, give my love to your mum, etc?

I'm guessing that your sister thought her "job" was making the introduction only, not really taking care of or chaperoning her niece (although meeting her at the station rather than at the cafe maybe gave a different impression to your daughter). I'd make sure you have the full story from your daughter and then ask your sister what happened rather than going in all guns blazing. If your daughter is feeling fine about it all now, I probably wouldn't be too furious.

I somewhat think that's unfair. Had the OP known her daughter was not going to be with her aunt and travelling home alone (OP should've asked being mum), then perhaps she could've run through everything with her, indeed teaching her how to navigate the tube etc the night before, showing her a tube map or route to walk etc.

It's still new to someone no matter the age, let alone 16 and can be a little overwhelming. I can understand the OP's concern but I don't understand blaming her sister. OP should've asked what's what.

So did I, but we were together with friends. I presume that's the difference? First time in London, and alone may be overwhelming. I know adults who are nervous about going into London for the first time.

Tbh, had I been the OP, I would've checked with my sister what the plan was at the start and not presumed anything. Not the sisters fault imo!

But are they not capable because they havent been taught to be? is it the parents treating them like children no matter how old they are the issue?

I seem to be in the minority, but after living and working in London I am on your side.

There is also a difference between a 16 year old knowingly going to London alone to one discovering they were going to be left alone in London. When people with ill intentions see vulnerability that’s who they target.

Also all 16 year olds are not equal. Sure there are 16 year olds capable of many things, but there are also 16 year olds who aren’t ready to be treated as an adult and that’s ok too.

Agree with almost everyone else.
YABRidiculous.

Blimey, my mates and I used to go up to London all the time for whole days when we were 14/15. No mobile phones in those days, either. Or bank cards; just an estimate of how much cash we might need to last us until we got home.
We survived.

She's 16 not 8. Let her live.

I would have expected that DSis would have left the young folks to it. She would not have wanted or needed to have been the third wheel there.

Your DD is 16. It was day time and Aunt had accompanied her to the cafe. How difficult was it to reverse the moves or ask for assistance? It was beneficial for your DD to be left to arrange her own travel home.

She used her nous and asked for assistance.

DD could have also - used google maps, phoned her Aunt, phoned you, phoned a taxi etc.
To work it out like she did was fine.

Congratulate her and revise what and how you are teaching your young adult daughter independence.

And tbf the vast majority of 12 year olds in London are capable of getting around on public transport to go to school or hobbies!

Any of the 16-years-olds I know would be mortified to have their Auntie sit in on what was meant to be a professional/grown up conversation!

My DS is 15 and in year 11.. won’t occur to me that I should stay if I offered similar to someone else’s DC. I think it was totally fine, and I can’t understand why you are outraged.

My children were dealing with public transport to get to school every day from age 11 onwards. I'm sure your daughter would have coped even without help.

Your sister and her friends did you and your daughter a massive favour, and you ae "beyond furious" about it? That's just ridiculous. She had the sense to ask for directions, they helped her, nothing bad happened.

Absolutely! If my sister left my 16 month old with strangers, I would be “beyond angry” too!

Oh wait, 16 year old? YABU.

It’s not the bloody 1980s - I’m sure she has a smartphone and could have looked up directions to the train station. If she isn’t capable of that, why not?!

Bobbins.

another non returning OP. Now there's a shocker.

Parenting has dropped to very low levels in the uk.
In other parts of the world kidsa are getting trains bus and walking to school way younger than 16.

Danger is all around us, we have to get on with it, raise kids the right way and street wise.

If you mollycoddle your kids they don't know how to get to a train station independently.

I am guessing she came across as pretty childish if they felt the need not only to walk her to the station, but also to wait for her train with her. Plus her account of what the meeting was like. They sound like kind people but I imagine they were a bit peeved by having to look after a total stranger's child. Or at least I would be - maybe they're nicer than me!

When my dd was a baby we somehow left her alone with an a -z for about 5 seconds (she was about 1, I think). She managed to eat some torn out sections of it and we kept finding bits of London in her nappy!

Shes survived fine to 17! 😂

Never said she should be angry at her sister, I said the opposite.

Being walked to the train station with the people she had a meeting with because she didn't know how to get there, who then stayed with her until on the train wasn't much initiative?! She was pretty much babysat the whole way.

She’s 16! Surely she can meet people in a public place without issues? And surely she can find her way to a station with google maps?

We live in London. So my child - 17 and 12 - move about London without me. Ok so I wouldn’t ask the 12 yo to find a new place without going over the route first, but he has done when transport has been cancelled.

My dd was going to Brighton with friends well before the age of 16 if you want to reverse it.

Apron strings!!