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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU / Ridiculous re putting extra mileage on my car

339 replies

MileageWoes · 09/04/2026 11:28

DH works from home, I work full time in the office. He is having major car trouble and will be without a car for the next few weeks. Obviously he doesn't need a car for work but he has a hobby that he travels to so is using my car morning and evening to do this. It's a 40 mile round trip, twice a day so means that he's putting over 500 miles extra on my car every week! I think he should cut back to once a day until he gets his own car back and he thinks I am being very unreasonable as it will only be for 3/4 weeks.

I WILL NOT BE DISCLOSING WHAT THE HOBBY IS! (I don't want to out myself and it's really really not relevant to my question)

OP posts:
WhatWouldDianeLockhartDo · 09/04/2026 11:37

Is the hobby driving aimlessly? Does he support family life? I’m flabbergasted.

JacquesHarlow · 09/04/2026 11:37

So he's going to add 2000 miles to your car @MileageWoes

The pertinent questions are

  • Will that invalidate your insurance, do you have a very mileage sensitive policy where you've set a limit of 4000 miles a year because you just pop to the shops?
  • Do you have a PCP where you have a mileage limit, and you have to pay more to the finance company if you exceed it?
PixelDreamer · 09/04/2026 11:37

PsychoHotSauce · 09/04/2026 11:35

500 miles a week. Apparently. I'm struggling to work out what kind of hobby would need attendance twice a day, every day though.

Show quote history

Horses...

budgiegirl · 09/04/2026 11:36

You really begrudge your DH putting miles on your car? That wouldn't even cross my mind - but then again, we have two cars and we share them, so we don't really have a 'his car, her car' mentality, either to cars or to finances.

Or is this really about something else - do you resent your DH's hobby, do you disagree with the way you run your finances etc? Are the miles actually a red herring to something deeper going on?

WhatWouldDianeLockhartDo · 09/04/2026 11:36

Do you have a limited mileage allowance that this would put you over? Is your car on its last legs and 500 miles extra could be the death knell? Is there another way you will be affected that we don’t know about? You’re being completely unreasonable. You’re married and sharing a life together, no?

if it’s not causing you hassle or moving your work hours around who cares?

HobnobsChoice · 09/04/2026 11:35

It's 500 miles a week. Not annually. Reading the post properly will give you a clue

PsychoHotSauce · 09/04/2026 11:35

toomuchfaff · 09/04/2026 11:32

You're begrudging your DH use of the car for a hobby they enjoy because its resulting in 500 annual miles.

That seems ridiculous to me. What is wrong with your marriage that 500 miles on the car is a breaking point?

500 miles a week. Apparently. I'm struggling to work out what kind of hobby would need attendance twice a day, every day though.

Bobloblawww · 09/04/2026 11:33

That is a ridiculous amount of time and mileage for a hobby regardless of whose car it is.

toomuchfaff · 09/04/2026 11:32

You're begrudging your DH use of the car for a hobby they enjoy because its resulting in 500 annual miles.

That seems ridiculous to me. What is wrong with your marriage that 500 miles on the car is a breaking point?

TheMillionthBeautyAddict · 09/04/2026 11:31

Sorry when is he actually working (or is he a roadie for The Proclaimers?!?!)

5foot5 · 09/04/2026 11:30

I don't have a strong opinion about the car mileage but I am sure I won't be the only one agog about a hobby he does twice a day, every day. Potentially HIBU for that.

Moonnstarz · 09/04/2026 11:30

Do you have separate finances? If so then maybe ask him about whether he will be contributing to car maintenance and if he is going to be paying for the fuel. If you have shared finances (and you do say he is your husband) then surely vehicles are shared and if you wanted to use his car in the future you would be able to.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 09/04/2026 11:30

How are your cars funded? Car/insurance/fuel/tyres? I wouldn’t begrudge my DP use of my car for a few weeks, but he’d do the same for me.

VickyEadieofThigh · 09/04/2026 11:29

Do you not need your car, if you work outside the home?

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