AIBU to stop my children wasting food at the holiday buffet?

Spot on! I rarely do AI for that reason. Given the state of the planet (which I'm always surprised never feature in these MN discussions), all these choices that privilege choice and self-indulgence over care and consideration for the planet (and others on it) do upset me. However, I have been on one AI holiday recently, and my DC chose what he wanted to eat and went back for seconds if he liked it, as did I. This isn't just about whether there is wastage at the resort, to me it is also about the principle/ethics of care that you are teaching your children.

If you find the waste distressing then I think AI or to be honest any resort with a buffet would be the wrong holiday choice for you.

I absolutely hate food waste but that doesn’t mean they need to clear their plates every time.

Just encourage them to take less and go up for 2nds or 3rds.

Try not to be too restrictive but explain that it’s not going anywhere and they can keep going up.
I think our palate changes once we start eating and so you night fancy something a bit different or more of the same thing once you’re not as hungry.

If they want strawberries, take 3.
Take smaller amounts of the other things too.
Then they can just go back up.

I have never done AI but I do think people probably do go a bit silly at first but then calm down when they know it’s not going anywhere.
So I wouldn’t get stressed out over it.

I don't think it's bad behaviour. I think it's learning how to behave. They do something; your reaction helps them to understand what is appropriate in the future.

My kids used to love the doughnuts and cake at hotel buffets. Never happened at home! Just like the woman I saw at our (exorbitant) hotel in Brazil who had a black coffee and a glass of prosecco for breakfast...

At a youth hostel in Budapest I once saw a Chinese pre-teen enthusiastically eating a doughnut on a fork, dipping it into tomato ketchup.

Indeed. I think either stop worrying about it or stop supporting it really. The food will be thrown away by the dumpster load, whatever your children do or don’t do.

I would really really dislike plates piled high and loads left. But it sounds like they're not doing that, so I would just gently comment "remember not to take more than you want" every time this happens. And praise them when they get it right.

YANBU etiquette dictates that if you help yourself to food then you eat it - otherwise why take it?

However, they are children and need to learn. Encourage them to try a small portion of something if they dont know whether they like it or not and if they do then they can always have some more can't they? And if they don't like it only a minimal amount has been wasted.

it also does occur to me that if someone HATES food waste, then supporting AI holidays is not a wonderfully ethical life choice?

I do get what your saying OP, i also hate food waste

I just remind my kids when they go up there is an infinite amount of food so they dont need to panic.

And if they leave alot ill remind them thats why when they are trying something to just take a little etc

But even as adults we will do it sometimes, ive had some stuff left over or taken something and not liked it so i am more relaxed with it on holiday.

Seriously your DC sound great. Just a little overexcited at a buffet which has happened to the best of us. A few instructions maybe but other than let them learn.

We go for in the middle - don't choose what they put on their plates but will be nearby to remind them to take a small amount and they can always come back for more.
It also stops them eating cakes/donuts/chips for breakfast which I still have no idea why they put them out in the morning and we have stayed a 4 and 5* hotels!

We also go AI for the same reason and found it more expensive to do bed and breakfast then eating out.

The age of children has no bearing on whether they need supervision or not. It comes down to whether they know how to behave or not.

It sounds like you ration /strictly control portion sizes at meal times at home to avoid waste. This is admirable, however, does have consequences.

This is probably the first time your DC have had portion size freedom. They will get some things wrong and get too much - this is normal, particularly with their upbringing

Your DC need to learn portion sizes for themselves. They also need to know that occasionally it is ok to leave food if they are full. You eating the bread just to prove you shouldn't leave waste at an AI is not being a great role model.

I have very fussy eaters in my household, I love AI buffets as it gives my DC a chance to try new things in a relaxed environment

Please relax and see this as a learning experience for your DC

Do you know what happens all the food left after a buffet? It’s binned so you curtailing your children’s food at it is wasting more food.

Personally, I would find food waste distressing - home or elsewhere the principle doesn't change. I would ask them to try everything they fancied - but take very small portions, and then seconds if they like it.

What do you think happens to the uneaten food at the end of the night?

Might not be piled high but one bite and leaving it.

Just because you can doesn't mean you should

If they genuinely don't like it that's fine but encourage them to think about choices, first time serving themselves needs supervision - how do they know what not to do or what items are/if they'd like it etc.

Take them when you get your own food. They can go back for seconds or pudding on their own and you can chill then.

Kids and adults alike often take far too much at buffets, so it's not something children seem to grow out of if they're not taught! I tell my DC that they never know if they're going to like the food they take even if it's something they usually eat, because it might be cooked differently, it's been sitting around etc. So they always take small helpings initially and have seconds if they like it.

It would make me feel bad, too. There are so many kids starving on this planet and the waste makes me feel uncomfortable.
Tell them to take only a little bit of the new food so that they can check if they like it or not. My kids did it when they were smaller in the past and I simply tried to finish what they've left. However, at 9 they should not be allowed to waste so much.

DD was always allowed to serve herself at home, even in nursery they encouraged the older ones. So a AI buffet was not that big thing, it was more the idea of so many new things.

I hate the pilled up plates, food just gets cold, stuff mixes which shouldn't mix.

We always went several times, starter and a plate with bread and butter to share, then when all had eaten, we would go for mains.
If DD wanted to try something new, she would take one or two bites of food and sometimes went and got more if she liked it.

I leave food if I don't like it and she has the same freedom.

Dessert and a shared platter with fruit when all had eaten their main course.

I’d say if you’re really concerned about food waste, AI was the wrong way to go. There must be TONNES of wastage there. You are trying to kid yourself that you aren’t contributing to that if you eat everything you select but that’s like green washing or something as the hotel will have had to cater so that everyone in that hotel, including your family, has a choice of all items, and that will inevitably generate a load of waste.

I would try to encourage them to try new things but not to take too much at once. Inevitably their eyes will be bigger than their bellies when faced with a new and exciting selection of food though. That's if they aren't fazed by the choice and newness, some kids are. Don't expect them at 9 to be better than the average 49 year old. Adults get a bit excited about buffets too.

@constantnc Just tell them it's rude to take lots or food you're not going to eat, so if they haven't had something before then just take a small amount to try it first then they can always get more.