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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is anyone being unreasonable here?

32 replies

ineousa · 08/04/2026 21:42

My friend is getting married next Christmas (2027) and is really keen to have a winter sun hen do before the wedding, so we have been invited to Tenerife. There is no pressure to go if anyone doesn’t want to go. The MoH has added all the hens who want to go into a group, and there are about 20 of us. The problem is that the flights have not yet been released. The MoH is keen to book accommodation now and then get flights once they’re released. However, others are not keen to do this in case we can’t get flights and lose money for accommodation. The MoH is worried that if we don’t book accommodation we’ll struggle to get somewhere for 20 people nearer the time. MoH has pointed out that there are daily cheap flights from our nearest airport to Tenerife daily and flights almost certainly won’t be a problem.

It is really upsetting the hen that there is no resolution. She would like to book it sooner rather than later and book the flights once they’re released, as that is what her husband to be has done for his stag and his friends have been happy to do so.

Which is more sensible?

YANBU - book accommodation now and flights later - there are daily cheap flights which will be releases

YABU - wait and book everything together but risk losing the accommodation

OP posts:
ColdAsAWitches · 08/04/2026 22:15

This is such a non-issue! Book somewhere with free cancellation. It's bloody obvious.

BlueMum16 · 08/04/2026 22:13

ineousa · 08/04/2026 22:09

People are concerned that if we book the accommodation then find that the flights are really expensive or not on for some reason then we’ll lose the money we’ve paid for the accommodation.

Book accommodation with easy cancellation or pay on arrival?

Statsquestion1 · 08/04/2026 22:12

Reserve something on booking.com??!!

Fast800goingforit · 08/04/2026 22:11

Book something cancellable. It should be possible this far out.

ineousa · 08/04/2026 22:09

ohyesido · 08/04/2026 22:01

I’m not sure I understand what the issue is with booking accommodation now and flights nearer the time? Tenerife isn’t a remote location with few flights. If it makes the bride happy I’d go with that

People are concerned that if we book the accommodation then find that the flights are really expensive or not on for some reason then we’ll lose the money we’ve paid for the accommodation.

OP posts:
ohyesido · 08/04/2026 22:01

I’m not sure I understand what the issue is with booking accommodation now and flights nearer the time? Tenerife isn’t a remote location with few flights. If it makes the bride happy I’d go with that

Shoxfordian · 08/04/2026 21:44

I think you have enough time to wait a year to book something but if she wants a specific place then just book it