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Original poster

To not understand what this parent was thinking?

461 replies

Frequency · 08/04/2026 20:59

While out with my rottweiler x this afternoon, I noticed he was panting more than I was comfortable with, so I abandoned our walk and took a detour to the nearest shop to buy him a bottle of water.

I crouched down at the edge of a very wide path to give him a drink. I wasn't paying attention to what was around me because I was watching the dog, and no one had any reason to be near us anyway. The pavement is about 8 feet wide on that street, if not wider. We were right at the edge, by the shop window.

The second I stood up, there was a toddler, eye-to-eye with my dog. He must have run up behind me while I was kneeling. He was literally nose to nose with the dog, reaching his hands out to grab/stroke the dog's face.

My dog is friendly but a little wary of small children, so I tend to keep him away from them.

Luckily, DD was with me and had spotted the kid and managed to hold his hands before he grabbed the dog's face and loudly told him, "Sorry, he's scared of kids, and he's just trying to have a drink, can you leave him alone, please?" She had to say it loudly because his mum and her friend had continued walking and were now a good 10 feet away from us. At this point, the mother then shouted at her other small child (around 7 or 8) to "get the baby," so the dog now had 2 kids to contend with while the mother kept walking away, ranting about how the young girl was supposed to be "watching the baby."

DD has anxiety and was really shaken by it, and can't stop thinking about how much worse it could have been if our dog were not friendly, or if the kid had managed to grab the dog's face and spooked/hurt him.

I still just cannot fathom what the mother was thinking, allowing her toddler to run up to a strange dog who was obviously eating/drinking, get nose to nose with him to try to grab him, and then send a second child over after she's made aware he is not a friendly dog?

Surely it is common sense to know that nose-to-nose with a strange, large breed dog, who is eating/drinking, is not a safe place to be, no matter how friendly the dog is?

OP posts:
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11
Thisle · 09/04/2026 06:36

Treadcarefully11 · 08/04/2026 22:58

The entitlement of dog owners never ceases to amaze me.

One child is worth more than all the dogs in the world combined.

I mean, I kind of agree, but then one has to parent one's child and keep it safe and Op was not being the entitled one in this situation.

Missey85 · 09/04/2026 05:26

TeenLifeMum · 08/04/2026 22:18

Completely this parent’s fault and bad parenting but, if you think there’s any risk your dog may react badly in such a situation you should have a muzzle on him/her.

Exactly right 👍 my friend keeps both her dogs muzzled and their friendly dogs

Dunderheided · 09/04/2026 05:16

I feel that pedestrians have the right to walk along a street and not have to maintain a high level of vigilance, beyond what is usually required in caring for a young child that can walk.

To paraphrase the OP,

Control your dog around dangers, not just young children, but also strange adults, heavy traffic, cars pulling up onto the pavement, or any number of other accidents which could have befallen the dog in that area.

If you're unable to control them verbally, use a leash and consider asking a friendly dog trainer for training tips .

TheGrimSmile · 09/04/2026 04:51

Oh, he's beautiful. All the mumsnet dog haters are out in force again 🙄

mathanxiety · 09/04/2026 04:40

CaffeineAndChords · 08/04/2026 22:17

Oh don’t be so ridiculous. What a stupid comment. It’s usually the ‘intimidating’ looking dogs that are the most goofy and lovely. The little ankle biters are more likely to bite or attack you. Coming from someone who’s worked in kennels and a veterinary practice!!!

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Indeed - chihuahuas immediately spring to mind.

SatsumaDog · 09/04/2026 04:30

Any dog is unpredictable when taken by surprise by a small child like this. It doesn’t matter what breed.

To allow a small child approach any dog like this is madness. It’s lucky her daughter was there to keep the child safe.

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 03:46

Such wit!😉

DeftGoldHedgehog · 09/04/2026 03:41

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 03:02

No dog is bomb-proof, nor should they be expected to be. They are sentient creatures who experience pain and fear as much as any other sentient being. Mine has never shown any aggression, but that doesn't mean he never, ever would under the wrong circumstances. Any dog can, which is why we need to teach children how to interact with them safely.

And also why you need to muzzle your dog!

There were two people at fault here. The parent of the child and the owner of the dog.

Muzzle yourself.

DeftGoldHedgehog · 09/04/2026 03:40

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Why respond to the OP like that? What a dick move.

Zapx · 09/04/2026 03:29

Poppinjay · 08/04/2026 23:09

Any dog could be dangerous when scared. We have a golder retriever that is trained to work with children and adores them. She reliably responds appropriately when approached by children, including the just-walking baby that grabbed her nose for balance once. However, I would never leave her alone with a child and I am regularly shocked by stupid parents who allow their children to approach her without knowing a thing about her.

The OP's point is that dogs should be treated like traffic, steep drops, heavy machinery. You don't allow your children to run up to them and grab them. If you do and your child gets hurt, that is on you.

I don’t think this is the case really. The law would normally not agree with you on that. If your dog is in a public space (as the OPs clearly was) and something happens, the law will almost always side against the dog owner. Some wiggle room around the OP or the dog being attacked. Dog owners are meant to anticipate that members of the public can, and do, act unpredictably (eg kids, SEN).

JMSA · 09/04/2026 03:16

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Couple of dicks here, but it’s not the OP or her dog.

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 03:16

But yes, spooked or hurt dogs can and do lash out, which is exactly why the child should have been supervised by his parent and should be taught not to approach strange dogs.

Yes, I agree the parent was at fault here. But surely you can see that the reason you have given above is also reason why you need to muzzle your dog?

You were in a public, shopping area. You cannot guarantee that the young children you pass by will be supervised every second. You cannot. What you can do is muzzle your dog so if he is spooked at least he can’t bite.

The child’s face was level with your dog’s for heaven’s sake! I’m with your DD…the potential consequences just don’t bear thinking about!

Original poster
Frequency · 09/04/2026 03:07

DD has anxiety, her immediate concern was what if the next dog is not friendly like ours is, followed by what if he gets spooked or hurt and tries to bolt into heavy traffic and his lead slips my grip, followed by what if he gets spooked or hurt and barks or jumps about, and the child then bolts into traffic, followed by what if I the mother shouts at me if I hold the child...

That is how anxiety works, she catastrophises.

I was concerned the interaction would set back his counter-conditioning.

But yes, spooked or hurt dogs can and do lash out, which is exactly why the child should have been supervised by his parent and should be taught not to approach strange dogs.

OP posts:
Galtymore · 09/04/2026 03:02

No dog is bomb-proof, nor should they be expected to be. They are sentient creatures who experience pain and fear as much as any other sentient being. Mine has never shown any aggression, but that doesn't mean he never, ever would under the wrong circumstances. Any dog can, which is why we need to teach children how to interact with them safely.

And also why you need to muzzle your dog!

There were two people at fault here. The parent of the child and the owner of the dog.

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 02:58

Frequency · 09/04/2026 02:34

I'm unsettled because the next dog the unsupervised child runs to and tries to grab might not be friendly, as I said in my OP. I was also mildly concerned that my dog might become fearful of children, had the child actually managed to grab him, and had hurt or spooked him.

DD has anxiety and was really shaken by it, and can't stop thinking about how much worse it could have been if our dog were not friendly

If you can advise on how I can use a muzzle to mitigate those concerns, I will take it into account. Nowhere have I posted that I was worried my dog would bite. He's never shown any signs of aggression.

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Do spooked dogs never, ever lash out then?

Why was your adult DD so worried?
What did she think would happen?

I suspect she was concerned your dog would react badly. You said as much in your OP —
“DD has anxiety and was really shaken by it, and can't stop thinking about how much worse it could have been if our dog were not friendly, or if the kid had managed to grab the dog's face and spooked/hurt him.”

How much worse it could have been if the kid had managed to grab the dog’s face and spooked/hurt him…

I’m sorry, OP, your story doesn’t add up. You’re changing it. You left out the last part of that quote in your reply to me because you know what you said in your first post doesn’t sound good and gives reason for alarm.

Muzzle the dog.

Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · 09/04/2026 02:54

Fellow owner of a large guarding breed here (until recently), I have lost count of the stupid shit parents allowed their children to do around her. Small kids tried to climb on and ride her, both when she was standing and lying down. Little baby and toddler hands in her mouth, eyes, ears. A posse of them swarming her from all directions at the vets while she was cowering beside me, scared and dying.

And don't get me started on the owners of little aggressive yappy dogs who thought it was soooooo cute when they tried to bite her face or heels.

Original poster
Frequency · 09/04/2026 02:42

No dog is bomb-proof, nor should they be expected to be. They are sentient creatures who experience pain and fear as much as any other sentient being. Mine has never shown any aggression, but that doesn't mean he never, ever would under the wrong circumstances. Any dog can, which is why we need to teach children how to interact with them safely.

Control your children around dangers, not just dogs, but also strange adults, heavy traffic, cars pulling up onto the pavement, or any number of other accidents which could have befallen the child in that area.

If you're unable to control them verbally, use a leash and ask a friendly dog owner for training tips Wink.

OP posts:
Original poster
Frequency · 09/04/2026 02:34

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 02:04

OP, clearly there was very poor parenting involved here, but if you’re unsettled by the interaction to this extent I think it clearly shows that your dog needs to be muzzled in public places where the public can interact with him.

You can’t control the behaviour of small children that pass you by on the street, so you need to be absolutely 100% sure of your dog and it’s abundantly clear you are not.

Muzzle him please, for eveyone’s sake!

Edited

I'm unsettled because the next dog the unsupervised child runs to and tries to grab might not be friendly, as I said in my OP. I was also mildly concerned that my dog might become fearful of children, had the child actually managed to grab him, and had hurt or spooked him.

DD has anxiety and was really shaken by it, and can't stop thinking about how much worse it could have been if our dog were not friendly

If you can advise on how I can use a muzzle to mitigate those concerns, I will take it into account. Nowhere have I posted that I was worried my dog would bite. He's never shown any signs of aggression.

OP posts:
Galtymore · 09/04/2026 02:20

Yes, both the parent and OP were at fault here.

Tinytimmy123 · 09/04/2026 02:19

Treadcarefully11 · 08/04/2026 22:58

The entitlement of dog owners never ceases to amaze me.

One child is worth more than all the dogs in the world combined.

For all those suggesting muzzling all dogs, a muzzled dog can jump around, push and pull when on leash especially if startled.

In this scenario the mother berated one child for not looking after the other but she herself initially was completely unaware of what was even happening. Would you allow your child ro run up into the face of a random person ? ... people can be unpredictable too. Teach your children about dog etiquette like you would other people/stranger etiquette.

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 02:18

OhWise1 · 09/04/2026 02:15

Did you take the dog into tbe shop or did you leave it outside with your kid?

OP’s DD is an adult (23).

OhWise1 · 09/04/2026 02:15

Did you take the dog into tbe shop or did you leave it outside with your kid?

Galtymore · 09/04/2026 02:04

OP, clearly there was very poor parenting involved here, but if you’re unsettled by the interaction to this extent I think it clearly shows that your dog needs to be muzzled in public places where the public can interact with him.

You can’t control the behaviour of small children that pass you by on the street, so you need to be absolutely 100% sure of your dog and it’s abundantly clear you are not.

Muzzle him please, for eveyone’s sake!

ThunderCatsHooo · 09/04/2026 01:52

Your dog should be muzzled if you think a child is likely to be bitten by it, why own such a dog if you are worried it would bite the face off a toddler? By the sounds of it you were on a public path, not your own enclosed land so it would be reasonable to think there might be other people and children around.

I've got fed up of stupid dog owners over the years with their dogs, my children are frightened of dogs as a result of selfish dog owners walking their dogs off lead in the children's play area. If it was up to me all dogs would be muzzled in public and only allowed off lead in designated areas that dog owners must pay to use. We stopped using the country park we live on the edge of because our young children just weren't safe walking along, dogs aren't meant to be let off leads there. Last week I did actually decide to take my children for a walk there and we encountered a dog walker with SEVEN off lead dogs on her own, a narrow path and I have 3 children, how was I meant to protect my children if 1 of them had gone for them? Muzzles for all dogs should be mandatory, any dog can bite and injure a small child, it doesn't have to be an xl bully to do serious damage or worse.

You are at fault here and had your dog attacked this 3 year old you would have been prosecuted and your dog destroyed, rightly so. Children should be safe from these dangerous animals.

MissSophiaGrace · 09/04/2026 01:41

Frequency · 09/04/2026 01:39

He's currently asleep on the sofa, dreaming of all the toddlers he's going to eat tomorrow.

He has this odd/annoying/sweet habit of gathering things he likes the smell of before from places he is not supposed to be to keep him company during the night. I'm not entirely sure where he found my slipper, but the clothes he has appear to be my PJs that were in the washing basket in the kitchen.

He's also been known to take empty food packets from the kitchen bin, utensils from the sink or draining board, and my trainers to bed with him. He doesn't chew them, he just lies with them.

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Oh my goodness, he sounds so adorable. He's the perfect size too, not too big but not small either. He certainly has loads of character.