AIBU long wait for a lift

How long did you wait for him, around an hour? Surely that’s better than waiting 2 hours for an Uber? I’d give him some slack considering he’s spent around 2hrs and 20mins of his day driving around for you

And he’s totally unsupportive of you when you are clearly in need of a bit of TLC.
There is literally no point to him at all.

Agree with everything this poster has said. Contact Women’s Aid to see how they can help you.

Sounds like you’ve got yourself a shit unsupportive partner and a shit lazy father for your children.

Taking you to hospital isn’t a favour it’s what you do for your partner and you should want to do it.

To add to my previous post - my ex treated me similarly when I was in hospital - I was an afterthought. I was young and naive, I tried not to let it bother me, I thought I was being over-sensitive and unreasonable. Well no, it should have damn well bothered me! It showed what he thought of me, it showed how low I was on his list of priorities! I ended up wasting years on someone who clearly didn’t prioritise me. The signs were clearly there, HE was giving me the signs. I was too naive to listen to them.
I got there in the end, but only after many wasted years.

I would have got myself a coffee and my book and enjoyed the peace and quiet while waiting for the uber.

BUT.

The bigger issue is that your husband sounds like a waste of space. Spending his time on gaming and not being able to cope with his own kids or look after his wife with any compassion? What does he actually contribute to the relationship apart from his sperm?

I am dismayed that your husband would view this as a favour. I don't mean to sound twee, but surely it's his duty as your husband?

He’s useless, thoughtless, clueless and then denies he’s done anything wrong!

I’d be telling him sharpish he needs to start being a proper Dad and supporting you through this period of ill health

Sorry u r going through this difficult time pretty much alone. Do the kids help? Friends & family?

OP he is useless and abusive.

Restricting your painkillers?
Hurting you where you have surgery?
100% deliberate.

Contact Women's aid, you are very vulnerable.
Tell family and friends you need help and protecting.

His behaviour is abusive and not normal.

“he had been finishing his computer game”
I could never be with a man who would act like this. Gross, immature.

I do think if people haven’t been through lots of health stuff, they don’t always realise how draining it is. (Obviously he may have been, of course). Hope you get better soon and get lots of tlc.

I don’t think you are being selfish at all. You should have been picked up pretty promptly.

Why didn’t he just wait for you? He could have took the kids to the cafe inside. I don’t understand why he’d leave you there stranded without checking first if Ubers were even available.

He sounds horrible OP. Once you’ve recovered I would look at LTB.

You are not over sensitive or over emotional. He prioritized his game over you waiting for him outside a hospital. Utterly outrageous, I would absolutely take my DH’s head off (not literally) if he did this. Hope you feel better.
oh and incidentally husbands don’t do favors for their wives, they support and help them!

If that’s his argument then he’s a dick! He’s your husband for Christ’s sake - surely it’s not too much to ask to expect him to pause his game and collect you asap from the hospital? I’d be fuming too.

Oh he’s abusive and deliberately making you suffer more.

Sorry you’re going through this OP, but he obviously is. It probably wasn’t accidental that he elbowed you in your wound, that’s awful.

Only thing you are being unreasonable about is letting him have the medicines and list. You need to take over that yourself as he clearly doesn’t have your best interests at heart.

I think he should have taken them to the park or out somewhere!

I might have waited for the Uber if I knew they’d all gone home but easy to say when you’re not in pain after an op

Tbf, I would have waited for an uber. Wouldn't be asking OH and kids to come back and then drive bk home again. But that's just me 🤷‍♀️

A divorce would be my response, I divorced one of my useless ex h's for not engaging with our kids. So I was ineffect a single parent before the divorce he was just added clutter on the seatee.
There were a couple of other smaller things but that was the main one.

Hey you, sounds like you've been having a tough time and your partner seems to be less than supportive just when you need him most.

Having had several hospital procedures myself I know how different it feels to hv someone there to cover the logistics compared to not.

Hope you are home soon and have a smooth recovery. Don't leap back into being "the capable one" - make sure you look after yourself and give yourself proper time to physically heal.

Not sure what to suggest about your partner - it sounds like they are either generally hopeless or, more likely, a master of strategic incompetence. Whichever it is - you don't need to automatically fill the gap.

Hope you feel better soon.