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AIBU?

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Original poster

Stopped from taking my child into a changing room.

132 replies

LemingsLemon · 07/04/2026 23:10

went to my local John Lewis today- more to buy some things for DD, but found a blouse that was on sale so decided to try it on

Went to the changing rooms- I had 3 items for DD (2 dresses and a pair of trousers) and the blouse. Went over to the changing rooms, pleasantries exchanged and attendant handed me a card with my number of items. DD was fast asleep in her small, umbrella fold buggy. Changing rooms are quite large- could have fit me and DD in th buggy in there with room for me to try items on.

Assistant stopped me as I was pushing her into a cubicle and explained it wasn’t allowed. Apparently in case I stole something and stashed it in the pram?!!? Assistant offered to keep an eye on DD for a few minutes while I tried my blouse on. I said I don’t know you, why would I trust a stranger with my daughter unsupervised. Assistant called a manager over who asked me to leave.

Safe to say I won’t be going back

AIBU to think this is batshit?

OP posts:
MyDeftDuck · 08/04/2026 07:05

It does sound a bit extreme….after all, the assistant had given you a numbered card for the items you’d selected. Take it higher up the JL management chain, you deserve an apology at the very least.

Mt563 · 08/04/2026 07:04

CurlewKate · 08/04/2026 06:59

I do think it’s bonkers. But I also do wonder a bit what you think might have happened to your dd being watched for a couple of minutes in a shop with you in earshot.

I really can't imagine in this day and age that a company would be happy with an employee assuming responsibility for a child, even for a few minutes.

CurlewKate · 08/04/2026 06:59

I do think it’s bonkers. But I also do wonder a bit what you think might have happened to your dd being watched for a couple of minutes in a shop with you in earshot.

Hwart · 08/04/2026 06:56

Their reasoning doesn't make any sense. Presumably she could see you only had one blouse and would therefore know when you come out if you'd stashed it. If you'd already stashed items in the pram then the changing room makes no difference.

Definitely email them.

Coconutter24 · 08/04/2026 06:54

Isittimeformynapyet · 08/04/2026 05:58

If they've already hidden stuff what's the point of going into the changing room?

Show quote history

Remove tags

pariswindow · 08/04/2026 06:51

John Lewis gets more and more bonkers. I stopped going in there years ago. I do shop online with them, but imagine the cost of processing my returns is far higher than if they provided a clean and safe store and suitable fitting rooms.

Imdunfer · 08/04/2026 06:48

Tag remover and goods hidden in pushchair. Tags removed from hidden items once in the cubicle, all hidden again, clothes "to try on" returned, and thief walks out through security barriers.

We all have to be treated like thieves when people behave like that.

Blueberryme · 08/04/2026 06:39

Being asked to leave a shop is last resort so it sounds to me like there is a chunk of conversation missing from your OP.

John Lewis pride themselves on their customer service so you either had an over zealous manager ordering you out of the shop from the little conversation that you have listed in your OP, and should consider then taking it further; or as I’ve said above there is a lot of conversation missing as I doubt JL managers order customers to leave for no reason other than you politely questioning their changing room policy.

pizzaHeart · 08/04/2026 06:38

LoveOwnCompany · 07/04/2026 23:27

They gave you a card with a number on for a reason. They just needed to check the number of items you come out with, like they normally do. The buggy is irrelevant and shouldn’t have even been mentioned. YANBU.

This 100% ^
Ime they would give you card for a blouse and suggest to leave items you are not trying in a basket with the assistant and pick them up on the way out of the changing room.

JulietteHasAGun · 08/04/2026 06:33

Well if they thought she’d already hidden stuff in the pram why did they let her leave?

either they think she has stuff hidden already in which case call the police. Or they don’t think she has stuff hidden in which case count the items out and in.

newornotnew · 08/04/2026 06:29

I think this warrants a written complaint, to find out if it is general policy. If it is they should make it clearer so that parents with pushchairs know they are not welcome to try things on.

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 08/04/2026 06:23

Isittimeformynapyet · 08/04/2026 05:58

If they've already hidden stuff what's the point of going into the changing room?

Show quote history

To remove security tags.

Natsku · 08/04/2026 06:22

plainjanesuperbrain2026 · 08/04/2026 06:15

Because private areas provide the necessary time and space to remove security tags, hide things far better and wear stolen clothes under their own garments. Some even shove things into their orifices. It's a thing.

But despite the fact that they are quite correct to be worried about thieves taking things into changing rooms, thieves do that without prams too and the shop's fear of shoplifters does not override a mother's right to have her baby with her at all times and not hand the baby over to some random.

Edited
Show quote history

Ah I see, thanks.

Daisymae55 · 08/04/2026 06:19

Ridiculous. I used to work in a boutique and this is exactly why we gave the cards with the number of items on it. Realistically, you could stash a blouse anywhere, like a handbag, the pram is irrelevant. On the other hand, occasionally we would have prams left outside changing rooms and customers would expect us to watch their kid and our manager was totally against this as it prevented us from doing our job and was an unnecessary risk for us.
I certainly wouldn’t be going back.

Alpacajigsaw · 08/04/2026 06:18

Happened to me in Matalan too when my now 20 year old was a baby. It did make me feel uncomfortable but all was well.

plainjanesuperbrain2026 · 08/04/2026 06:15

Natsku · 08/04/2026 06:12

Then the changing room makes no difference, does it?. And that's why I would offer to let them search the pram.

Show quote history

Because private areas provide the necessary time and space to remove security tags, hide things far better and wear stolen clothes under their own garments. Some even shove things into their orifices. It's a thing.

But despite the fact that they are quite correct to be worried about thieves taking things into changing rooms, thieves do that without prams too and the shop's fear of shoplifters does not override a mother's right to have her baby with her at all times and not hand the baby over to some random.

Natsku · 08/04/2026 06:12

Missey85 · 08/04/2026 05:42

Because they hide the stuff it doesn't matter what number is on the card you could have hidden it before you came

Show quote history

Then the changing room makes no difference, does it?. And that's why I would offer to let them search the pram.

plainjanesuperbrain2026 · 08/04/2026 06:10

Isittimeformynapyet · 08/04/2026 05:58

If they've already hidden stuff what's the point of going into the changing room?

Show quote history

Sometimes shoplifters will put clothes on and wear them out of the store, or take the time to hide things better - but nevertheless they were absolutely bonkers to try to separate a mother from her baby.

plainjanesuperbrain2026 · 08/04/2026 06:09

I would take this further, how dare they try to separate a mother from a baby?! Absolutely bizarre.

Isittimeformynapyet · 08/04/2026 05:58

Missey85 · 08/04/2026 05:45

It's got nothing to do with the girl or the number on a card they hide the stuff so the number on said card isn't counting those items is it? Use your brain

Show quote history

If they've already hidden stuff what's the point of going into the changing room?

Missey85 · 08/04/2026 05:45

TheseWordsAreMine · 08/04/2026 02:35

Why count on the way in, if they dont trust the girl on the way out to count?

It's got nothing to do with the girl or the number on a card they hide the stuff so the number on said card isn't counting those items is it? Use your brain

NormasArse · 08/04/2026 05:45

Did you only say exactly what you said in your OP?

Missey85 · 08/04/2026 05:42

Natsku · 08/04/2026 04:39

If they counted how many items you took in, and will count when taking out then how exactly would you shoplift with the pram? Did you offer to let them search the pram afterwards? I think I would have done that rather than leave and not try on something I wanted to try. I do have sympathy for staff being told they have to follow a rule and prevent shoplifting but no one should be asked to leave their baby out of their sight with a stranger.

Because they hide the stuff it doesn't matter what number is on the card you could have hidden it before you came

Mapletree1985 · 08/04/2026 05:40

I wouldn't be at all surprised if shoplifters regularly use prams stash their stuff.

GeorginaWilby · 08/04/2026 05:34

I'm sorry, I voted you were being 'unreasonable' by mistake. I feel so strongly you were being reasonable, I had to correct that.
I'm shocked they expected you to leave your baby with a stranger and then told you to leave when you refused. Shop online.

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