Sorry, this is long.
I have three teens. None of them are tidy, really (is this teens?! Is it us?!? Why can I not have at least one tidy one?!?)
We live in a converted bungalow, with a huge master bedroom/en-suite and another small bedroom upstairs, and two further larger bedrooms downstairs.
Teen 1 is 19 and has the other upstairs bedroom. I very rarely see in his room, but I think he's fairly messy. However he does do massive tidy ups (often in the middle of the night) and guts it. It doesn't really affect anyone.
The other two teens are 16 and 14. They are grim. I can't actually go into their rooms without it ENRAGING me.
The youngest can be cajoled into tidying, especially as her allowance hinges on her being compliant and clearing up.
It's the middle child. Through no fault of her own, her room is at the front of the house and so any footfall in the house passes her room. It's a pit. Clothes, make up, books, drinks bottles - you name it, it's on the floor. It's the stuff of nightmares.
She is otherwise excellent. Helpful around the house, takes the dog out, is academic, studies very hard, has a part time job and is just generally very motivated and lovely.
So, would you disrupt all of that to make a point about the room? It will lead to a fall out, strained atmosphere and I'm not even sure it'll end up with a consistently tidy room. But it feels wrong to let her live in what is essentially squalor.
WWYD?