AIBU to ask my partner to move out over benefits?

OK.

Attendance Allowance is a disability benefit that people over state pension age claim when they have care needs.

But they can only earn £195 a week to continue claiming carers allowance so the partner would have to drop working hours hugely?

In this case the op is sick. But how many people out there are playing the system? Living apart to maximise benifit gain?

Am I getting mixed up with "Attendance Allowance" then ? 🤔

You are not allowed to earn more than a very small amount per week while claiming carers allowance

Well, it sounds like OP doesn't have any savings unlike her partner so it doesn't sound like she is better off.

You keep mentioning being on benefits in your posts as though that automatically means someone is worse off than a person not on benefits. The truth is that the OP could easily be bringing in more than her partner each month with child and disability related benefits, then the added non-income benefits (e.g. glasses, dentists, fsm) on top.

No.
I'm saying they could apply for a Carer's Allowance.
Lot's of people have a Carer's allowance and work.

And this thread is what is wrong with the benefits system. If the partner moves in there is still the same amount of money coming in...but the op doesn't want to lose their benefits...
What if, just saying, the benefits system works so that if the partner moves in, they get the same money...if she moves out the op reverts to the benefits they were on previous...like with a computer etc...i mean I'm supposed to enter my tax details on line now, so why can't benefits work online? I met a guy I know today who is almost blind, his meta glasses read the labels in shops for him....it's not impossible to get a system where the op comes off benefits without you worry surely?

You get charged a handling fee by the optician to use your existing frames, and they won't guarantee they won't break them. It's as cheap to buy new frames.

and my son will likely never work due to having cancer and complications that then came from it. He didn't even need a STC but still had complications.

We don't even know what OP's health issue is.

Well you're either dependant on her or dependant on the state, the more stable option is to be dependant on the state, either way is shit, not 100% sure this isn't rage bait, as you've already had a few takers.

I thought I was fairly left wing before reading this.

I managed to get back into work despite having AML twice then a STC + have 2 kids in primary school and am pretty sure I am at least 10 yrs older than the op

Its hardly true love is it

Are you really suggesting someone quits their job so they can claim carers? It's not a massive amount of.money.

Why not apply for a Carers Allowance and they can be the carer?

So there's your answer. It's financially detrimental and it's going to cause problems for you and your children ( and for your partner if they need to sleep during the day). The summer holidays are going to be very stressful. Better to leave things as they are and live separately

That's how it works. I know people who aren't on benefits who struggle with prescription charges etc.
Being a couple means u share financial resources.
Good luck with your decision

and that would feel dishonest to me. If you have savings, you don't need to borrow money from someone on benefits because that is what savings are for.

£2800 isn’t a lot of a family of 4 as that is what you will be and I’d lose benifits then she will be paying for most of what you do /have /want /need and your kids

do you get cms for both kids ?

This is the key point isn't it? The discussion about money is irrelevant really. If you truly wanted to live together then you'd find a way to make it work.
I think you need to be honest with your partner about how you feel.

Be honest. The money issue could be overcome. You dont want her to live with you, you find it disruptive.

£2800 isn't a massive buffer for a self sufficient adult and is way below the amount of savings UC are interested in so I don't know why you suggest it could go into the family pot.

£1K per month due to her earnings is different and would need to be included in your family budget if you carried on living together. But then you don't seem to enjoy it so why would you, even without the finances?

Check into your schools individual policy. Ours still provides Pupil Premium and free school meals for 6 years after becoming financially ineligible.

"I was always under the impression that she doesn’t earn very much, living on the breadline - because that’s what she has always told me - now it transpires that she earns a lot more than she said and also has quite a bit in savings."

You would not be asking her to move out "over benefits" - you'd be asking her to move out because for two years she's been lying to you. Doesn't matter whether those lies have been explicit or by omission - I'd feel deliberately misled and unable to trust her again. What else could she have misled me about?

Edit:
Having now read all your posts, the shifts she works having such an impact too - no, she absolutely needs to move out, this is not a viable domestic set-up.

Either your partner pays you the £1,000 plus half the bills, or she moves out.