To be ground down and exhausted by DS’s constant talking?

Same here, all 3 of mine are like this, I thought it was just what having kids is like! Second audiobooks, or loud music in the car/kitchen while I'm stacking the dishwasher to drown it out!

i have an adult friend that likes to chatter, and usually i just let them talking and be like yes dear etc

I have not read the whole thread, but can you tell him to talk to a stuffed animal instead for a while? I read that advice somewhere. He will still be talking, but not with you.

My DD is the same and is diagnosed with both ADHD and autism. I feel awful as I get overwhelmed sometimes when she doesn’t stop and I find myself drifting 🤦‍♀️
As she gets older she has started recognising when she’s been doing a constant monologue and says she will stop for a bit as she has been “machine gunning talking” as she calls it 🤣

No advice OP, but OMG I FEEL YOUR PAIN. I think my DS has used up his reasonable allowance of words by about 8am most days.

My child has never grown out of this. It’s almost like a nervous energy. Or that silence makes them uncomfortable.

As they have got older I have been more blunt about conversations being a two way thing. No improvement. The school run is the worst. She doesn’t stop for breath. Doesn’t care if I respond. And re-tells the same stories.

It’s so fucking draining being talked at all the time.

Sympathies. My elder two are like this. Youngest doesn't talk quite as much but it turns out he has a significant speech delay, oops. Both older ones do have ADHD (as do I and I can talk your ear off as well) but I don't know that it's an ADHD thing specifically, I think it's a fairly common issue. However, I do have to say that because of this I actually don't really know what's normal.

With DS1, who used to talk even in his sleep, it got better when he got to the age that he and his friends all got phones and could phone each other up instead of rabbiting on to me constantly 🙈 and now obviously he is a teenager and mainly grunts, although if I catch him in the right mood (usually the key is it has to be after 10pm when the internet has shut off for the night) he will happily rabbit on about all sorts to me for a couple of hours until one of us goes wait, shouldn't you go to bed??

DS2 is on medication now for the ADHD but if anything it has made the talking worse as he will now monologue to you for hours about his special interests, though he is less likely to repeat your name and insist that you respond with the correct amount of enthusiasm. He just doesn't notice. He will keep explaining the intricacies of every single minecraft mod until your brain leaks out of your ears.

Joking aside, some of the stuff in this webinar is genuinely useful. Despite the channel name, the advice is not just for ND children but any child who has "intense connection needs" (which I think is code for "wants to talk to you 24/7 and/or be in full body contact at all times")

Some other things which have helped have been asking DS2 and 3 to wait their turn - I was so used to the constant talking that I would just let them talk over each other because I could follow both at once, but I realised that wasn't especially helpful, either for DS2 to learn how much space he can expect to take up in a conversation, or for DS3 to practice speaking more clearly. And also saying explicitly that I needed to take a break when I did need to and sometimes doing so in another room, which is hard to do when your youngest is so little.

Yes my eldest didn’t stop moving or talking from the moment he opened his eyes until the moment he (eventually) went to sleep, although still restless through the night. We do have periods of teen silence now though, I still get surprised at his younger brother just sitting there not saying anything sometimes.

Have you tried a visual timer? You could use it so at dinner time he can’t talk until the sand runs out or the timer runs down to zero.
Visual timers work well (particularly with ND children) as they can see the time and know there is an end coming up. You could also use it as an aide to model reciprocal conversation.

Oh god the following. I have two spaniels
as well and I can’t turn around sharply because there is always either DD or a dog behind me.

Sounds like me.Just diagnosed ADHD with autistic traits.Hyperactivity come out physically and verbally for me.
Repeating things helps ideas and thought stick.58 when I got diagnosed.
I think it's called verbal processing.

DD10 does not shut up. It's always me she talks to. I have such a hard time listening for an entire day. I love her so much and so want to be an attentive mother but sometimes my brain just filters her out and then I realise she's looking to me for a response and I have nothing. Literally no idea what she's been saying. If I leave the room she follows me.

It's tough going.

Mine talked all the time. All the time. But to be fair they come from a family that talks all the time. You need more adults OP to be talked at, also is your DC anxious, I always felt one of mine talked to secure attention rather than to have a conversation if you see what I mean.

My son is 6, so a year older than yours. This time last year I vividly remember googling ‘why do I find my 5 year old son so irritating?’ The chattering shite about nothing, screeching for no reason, nonsense noises, etc.

I find him much, much easier now - he just really went through a really flipping annoying stage at age 5, but he’s largely grown out of it.

Very similar situation here.

Constant yapping, I am overstimulated, overwhelmed, stressed and cross.

I also do not suspect ND, although I suppose it’s not impossible. I do suspect it’s an attention thing, but he already gets SO much attention. and it’s a vicious circle, becuase I will give him loads of attention, he will want more and do the incessant talking / questions….and I completely disassociate. Which is bad, I know it is, but it gets to a point I just can’t take anymore. I don’t get time alone with my thoughts, can’t have a bath in peace (he talks through the door at me), can’t read a book or watch tv….so I end up scrolling on my phone, MN or YouTube videos and just completely disassociating. It’s a horrible waste of time and I feel awful ignoring him for something as low rent as YouTube videos, but I can’t do anything that requires concentration (reading a book etc) and I sometimes just need a five minute break from it.

Husband also does not respond quickly so I also end up snapping “please answer him!” to stop the constant “dad, dad, dad…dad, look. Look at this dad, dad. Dad”

its just awful. I’m hoping he grows out of it.

you have described me too.
one of mine has adhd/autism and f me its a nightmare. Constantly talking and I feel like a grumpy mess towards them its so so hard and i feel awful!

it is so hard to be happy around them sometimes. I plan lots of days out/helpful activities and roll with it. Staying in all day and not having a plan is a living nightmare!

I know this is light hearted but today my throat is literally sore from telling her to stop talking (we were doing something together where I needed to concentrate), in increasing tones of exasperation.

As a friend once joked ‘you’re not allowed to hit them anymore’.

I spend a lot of monologuing children. Often I don't respond to everything and when I need to will just interrupt and redirect them. Sometimes I'm quite blunt and honestly I don't think any of them are ever really offended by it as I think half the time they are not that bothered about you listening as they are busy listening to themselves.

At the dinner table I would give him talk tokens, once they are gone no more talking until dinner is done. I would also make him leave the cinema for constant talking as it is so unfair on people around you.

😂 considering the thread we’re on with non stop talking children driving us crazy - it was plausible!

Both! I like your style!

100% been there, both mine were non-stop talkers (especially 4-8), but then so are their parents, to be fair.

One thing I found actually worked, with the nonsense stuff (things like asking 'Why is that place far away?' yes, I genuinely had that) I started saying something like 'That doesn't make sense, I'm not going answer it'. It made it easier to cope with it without your head exploding.

What does AD stand for?
My imagination is going wild 😂
is it annoying daughter or adopted daughter?

We are big cinema and theatre-goers. My death stares are pretty lethal. I was pleasantly surprised that AD2 sat through a kids’ theatre production for an hour last week. Not so much the mother sat behind us who was performatively explaining everything to her child. In a normal voice. To be fair to your DS and my AD, they are growing up in a loud world where very few people now respect the etiquette of being considerate to other people. I wouldn’t rule out ADHD. Also, just to point out to all the people here who are doing the whole my kid does this because they are super-bright and ask incredibly clever questions schtick: neurodivergent children can also be very intelligent.