To be ground down and exhausted by DS’s constant talking?

My ds requires me to repeat things otherwise he will say it non stop. "Volcanoes make lava. Volcanoes make lava" x200 until I say "yes, volcanoes make lava" and then he can move on. But if I just say hmm or yes or wow how interesting he won't. It has to be a parrot style repeat of what he says.

That is a very good idea - I will suggest it to my friend. However, her son also has bought into conspiracy theories in a big way (one of his main topics of conversation/monologues) so I doubt he'd trust AI to talk to - although he might, it's a good thought, thank you!

Surely this where a little robot/online A.I. friend would be a help
A.I. Confidential series on bbc had a man in California whose partner was A.I. generated. They are designed to be supportive in conversation, kind.

I agree. Some of these children need to be told to shut up and punished if they do not.
Some parents think it’s charming. It isn’t.

My Dd used to be like this and I now have a 5 year old granddaughter like this.

I told my dd and now my granddaughter that my brain and ears need a rest so no more talking for 5 minutes. No exceptions!

It really does work. I first thought of it when I was driving because it was getting dangerous as I couldn’t concentrate properly.

And think it is absolutely fine to tell dc to be quick occasionally.

Just in reply to the pp who said they improve as they get older, if it is ADHD.

Not always. My long time friend has an AuDHD son in his thirties. I regularly have her turning up on my doorstep in tears because he talks AT her, incessantly, all day from the moment he gets up. She is at her wits end because he will never leave home and she sometimes simply can't stand it. He repeats too, doesn't listen to her at all and simply repeats sentences linked to whatever his special interest is.

I really hope your little lad grows out of it!

I think you just described my 5 year old😂

To be honest I think its part personality and part age. My 5 year old is meeting expectations in reception but he's 'high energy'. Verbally and physically.

No advice but my 12 year old has always been like this it drives me round the twist. Sometimes it gets to the point I can completely tune him out - if I don’t I’ll end up shouting.

I’ve just accepted it is the way he is.

To be honest, if I were Roger’s mum, I would be enjoying my peace and quiet browsing the middle of Lidl - perhaps purchasing a kayak or two - and taking advantage of the special offers on fine wines with which to raise a toast to SILENCE.

Once upon a time there was a little boy called Roger. And Roger loved to talk.

From the moment he got up, until the moment he went to sleep he was talking. Blah, blah, blah. Prattle, prattle, prattle.

The thing was though that Roger didn't have enough to say.

But because he loved to talk, he would ask his mummy questions that he already knew the answer to like 'What time is it mummy? Or he would tell her things that she already knew: 'I've got a super watch mummy'.

And all day long it went on: prattle, prattle, prattle, blah, blah, blah.

If he's just piped down and looked at a book or played a game he would have had new things to talk about.

But he didn't see that, so he just carried on: prattle, prattle, prattle, blah, blah, blah.

Now Roger's mummy loved him, so she didn't want to say 'Pipe down Roger; you're just prattling', in case it hurt his feelings.

So she learned to close her ears and let all the prattle, prattle, prattle, blah, blah, blah wash over her.

Now one day Roger and his mummy went to Lidl.

When they got out of the car, Roger's mummy was finding the pound coin and the shopping bags, so she didn't notice a hungry wolf in the car park.

Roger noticed the hungry wolf and he said 'Mummy, there's a hungry wolf over there'. But mummy just heard blah, blah, blah, prattle, prattle, prattle, cos that's what Roger mostly said.

Then the wolf began to run towards Roger, growling and slavering and Roger cried out 'Mummy, there's a hungry wolf growling and slavering and running towards us'. But mummy just heard blah, blah, blah, prattle, prattle, prattle, cos that's what Roger mostly said.

And then the wolf grabbed Roger in his slobbery jaws and swallowed him up. And while he was being swallowed Roger shouted 'Mummy, I'm being swallowed by a slobbery, hungry wolf'. But mummy just heard blah, blah, blah, prattle, prattle, prattle, cos that's what Roger mostly said.

And now Roger is no more. He's been eaten up and swallowed by a hungry wolf.

(Actually, now, he's wolf poo)

And Roger's mummy wishes that she's said to him 'Pipe down Roger, you're just prattling'

And Roger doesn't wish anything because he's gone. Swallowed by a hungry wolf.

But if he could wish things, he would wish that he hadn't always been saying blah, blah, blah, prattle, prattle, prattle.

I do think it’s important to tackle it rather than endure it. It’s being aware of others and understanding you have to take turns in a conversation, remain on task and show interest in what the listener is saying. At 5 these are improranf skills to work on.

My DS talks constantly, holding monologues about his interests. He has ADHD (but only recently identified - he is 11. Before that everyone just thought he was very talkative). It is draining. But also very tricky because younger DS (3 years younger) never gets a word in, so have to actually say to him that now is not his time to talk, to enable younger DS. It also means they fight a lot because one is quite annoying and doesn’t let the other talk.
physical exercise helps - much harder to talk when you are running/ playing/ swimming, plus it calms him down after as well.
not giving answers… but redirecting… what do you think? Why do you think that?how about you look in your dinosaur book?
That is great, but right now I need some quiet time - you can stay with me and read your book quietly, or go and play…
ultimately- he will need to learn that he cannot be the only person who talks all the time, and that there are some situations when he cannot talk.
it is unlikely to go away, and very hard to manage.

YANBU that sounds very full on. I think play dates & holiday club during school hols are your solution. Has he got a friend you can invite over & interact with? Then he might get invited back?

I was going to recommend headphones and podcasts or music for OP! I tell DS I need it for my calm down and it does help me have more patience

Sorry to throw another pop diagnosis in, could be way off the mark but for she have any other signs of Tourette’s? Any ticks etc?

I understand completely.

DS (11) is getting better. The car remains where he will have a one sided conversation effectively with himself or ask me questions that he then doesn’t listen to the answer to. I just tune out once I feel myself getting cranky which I realise isn’t great but better than snapping.

Mine are 7 and 9 and the same. DS used to not speak (delayed) and I have to remind myself to be grateful he’s speaking 😂

I think it’s ok to set boundaries. Talking all the way through a movie is an absolute no no and you should have taken him out.

I often say I need quiet time with no one speaking to me.

And I’ve become pretty expert and going ‘uh huh. Uh huh. Gosh’ when I’m not listening at all.

sounds like a mix of him talking TO you/asking questions, and then the general level of noise he generates even when playing independently?
two suggestions-

1. teach him to put his hand on your arm when he actually needs a response; could also try getting him to wait until you’ve finished whatever else you’re doing before he asks the question, but that might take a bit longer!
2. get yourself some loop earplugs (or similar) you’ll still be able to hear him, but it will take the edge of the constant noise

Yeah but this is where I just told mine to zip it as I’m tired of talking and need some quiet time and would be turning up the music in the car or it’s time for them to go and do something on their own and they can talk to their teddies if they want. If they continue to talk to you, just do the zip it motion and ignore them.

My son is like this. This was constant since he learnt how to talk until maybe 2-3 years ago when he "calmed down" and became more self-conscious (he is 11 now). He was also a hyperactive toddler/child. I have no advice really, it will get better at some point as years go by. Maybe try to refocus his energy and interest him in maths, so that there is at least some academic benefit to his excessive talking.

I saw someone refer to their springer as a clinger spaniel on Facebook the other day and thought it was spot on!

What would happen if he talked into his/your phone then played it back to himself?

It is developmentally normal, it's because they don't have an internal monologue until they are older so they have to voice every thought out loud.

This is how most kids are, isn't it? My 8 yo is like this, tbh I don't listen, I tune out and say "oh boy" "hmm" and "yeah true" now and again. What's funny is my son knows I'm not listening and has pointed it out, but he doesn't care and keeps talking.

Embarrassingly, I know I was Iike this as a kid also. Sorry mum and dad!

I would talk to him about conversations and how important it is to listen. When he starts I would answer but then ask a question and repeat but it’s my turn to talk now, please answer my question. I’d keep gently but firmly bringing him back to the point.

Id try putting a film on at home but a short and when he talks stop the film
and explain you want to listen to the film and keep firm with that.

You need to help him because Its likely he’s doing this at school and you don’t want it to impact his friendships.