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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do people have no shame any more?

264 replies

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 15:38

I don't know if the worst part of this story is the fact that its theft or the fact people don't care.

I was in Tesco this morning buying eggs (the normal type, not chocolate) and a couple were standing by the egg display swapping the eggs from two half-dozen boxes of the fancy premium brand eggs into a box for 12 Tesco own-brand eggs. They weren't even being subtle about it. He was just standing there holding the boxes while she swapped the eggs over. He then double checked that the designer eggs she had put in the Tesco box were all unbroken, and then they put the expensive box containing the cheap eggs back on the shelf and put the cheap box with the expensive eggs in their trolley, and off they went.

During all of this I and three other customers were just standing openly watching them and casting glances at each other.

The difference in price was probably about 50p per box, so about a quid in total. But is that the point? Are the eggs so much better that it's worth a heist, or are people just so pissed off with the CoL crisis that anything they can do to feel that they are getting something for nothing is worth while?

The couple so clearly didn't care that I couldn't see the point in telling them it was theft, but when they left I moved the two boxes containing the cheap eggs to one side and left them open, so nobody would pick them up not realising they weren't the fancy eggs.

AIBU, this is fine and large supermarkets have it coming?

or AINBU, this is still theft and cheeky fuckery of the highest order?

And more interestingly, what cheeky fuckers have you seen lately who could beat this?

OP posts:
tachetastic · 06/04/2026 20:57

latetothefisting · 06/04/2026 20:56

I bought some nutella, got home and there was a hole in the foil wrap and a finger sized hole in the spread 😬

Please tell me you didn't eat any.

OP posts:
latetothefisting · 06/04/2026 20:56

SquallyShowersLater · 06/04/2026 17:27

Well it's clever, I'll give them that. Did you not say anything to them? Or to the staff? I would have. They may not care about stealing from Tesco but what about stitching up the poor customer who pays for premium eggs only to get budget ones?

I bought a packet of Ibuprofen from Asda a few weeks ago, got outside, went to take a couple and somebody had already beat me to it. 😡

I bought some nutella, got home and there was a hole in the foil wrap and a finger sized hole in the spread 😬

Heyhelga · 06/04/2026 20:56

I swear so many people have totally lost the plot since lockdown. Just feels like law and order is in the bin at the moment.

FishFingerCrumbs · 06/04/2026 20:53

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 20:52

So they should be allowed the posh eggs?

Then who gets the cheap eggs in your ideal world? Or are there no cheap eggs because all eggs are created equal?

Food should be free for all. 👊

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 20:52

FishFingerCrumbs · 06/04/2026 20:46

You're privelaged. Rule of law is colonialism and from the patriarchy. Capitalism is bad. ✊

So they should be allowed the posh eggs?

Then who gets the cheap eggs in your ideal world? Or are there no cheap eggs because all eggs are created equal?

OP posts:
AntiqueBabyLoanSmurf · 06/04/2026 20:50

pinkstripeycat · 06/04/2026 19:43

I saw a couple with 2 older children load a trolley full in Morrisons and walk straight out. They swiped a Christmas tree as they left. No one stopped them and loads of people saw them go. They got in to their 2024 7-seater people carrier and left.

The same week, in the same supermarket, 4 male members of staff chased a homeless man around the store as he tried to steal a 2 pint carton of milk. He dropped it down his joggers and it fell out the bottom as it was so heavy. They kept chasing him and 2 of them piled on him before frog marching him out of the store.

Purely thinking from the supermarket's pov - and I'm not saying that it's right or fair in any way - but the family clearly did spend a lot and probably do so every week. Plus they also have a position of power: claim to be respectable members of the community, threaten to go to the local paper, tell all of their associates and be all over social media to expose the shop for 'falsely' accusing them of theft etc.

In stark contrast, the homeless man probably comes in to nick stuff all the time without ever spending any money, might put off other customers if he's dishevelled and stinky, and won't come across as respectable or an upright citizen whatsoever. Moreover there's only one of him and, if he lives out on the streets, sporadic diet (and may be an alcoholic and/or junkie), he's physically highly unlikely to be able to put up much of a fight. To be blunt - and not excusing theft - he's very low-hanging fruit for their security guards.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:47

FishFingerCrumbs · 06/04/2026 20:46

You're privelaged. Rule of law is colonialism and from the patriarchy. Capitalism is bad. ✊

Who is?

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:47

Ilovelurchers · 06/04/2026 20:43

Interesting one, OP.

I would never report someone for stealing basic foods - I work with too many families who have to take it in turns to skip a meal..... You never know if someone is shop lifting out of sheer desperation.

However, in this case the couple could clearly afford eggs, they just preferred the fancy-schmancy ones.

Still doubt I would report it myself - I just wouldn't feel strongly enough about it to risk the possible fall out - but I wouldn't judge someone who did, either.

Stealing is still wrong though. If they get caught and want to spin a sob story then that’s up to them.

FishFingerCrumbs · 06/04/2026 20:46

You're privelaged. Rule of law is colonialism and from the patriarchy. Capitalism is bad. ✊

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 20:46

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:44

Do you really imagine the court staff would have nipped out to get a bag of shopping for him?

No, but it would make a nice ending to the story, wouldn't it?

OP posts:
Ilovelurchers · 06/04/2026 20:45

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:38

Presumably if there is a H&S rule like that, there is some reason for it. I would absolutely have reported - thieving scum

"scum" is a very harsh word. If you feel so strongly about people committing such a minor theft, what on earth would you do people who actually steal items/amounts of any significance - tax evaders for example? Bring back the death penalty?

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:44

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 20:24

That's awful. I hope the magistrate found a way to find him not guilty, or if not then the court staff had a bag of shopping for him to take home with him when he left.

If the couple today had been sneaking a cheap box of eggs, loaf of bread and packet of ham I would have understood. The thing that got to me was the pettiness that they were willing to pay for eggs, but they wanted to end up with better eggs than they were paying for. It felt like one-upmanship rather than a couple on the breadline.

Do you really imagine the court staff would have nipped out to get a bag of shopping for him?

Ilovelurchers · 06/04/2026 20:43

Interesting one, OP.

I would never report someone for stealing basic foods - I work with too many families who have to take it in turns to skip a meal..... You never know if someone is shop lifting out of sheer desperation.

However, in this case the couple could clearly afford eggs, they just preferred the fancy-schmancy ones.

Still doubt I would report it myself - I just wouldn't feel strongly enough about it to risk the possible fall out - but I wouldn't judge someone who did, either.

XenoBitch · 06/04/2026 20:40

greenteaandlimes · 06/04/2026 20:38

You should have said something to them or to security, OP. You’re part of the problem!

Ha, some of us have done just that. Nothing gets done.

greenteaandlimes · 06/04/2026 20:38

You should have said something to them or to security, OP. You’re part of the problem!

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:38

AntiqueBabyLoanSmurf · 06/04/2026 20:36

I don't understand the people saying to tell a member of staff. Firstly, they could get violent and/or abusive; secondly, they're surrounded by eggs, which would not be pleasant to be pelted with; and thirdly, if all they can be sure of is that some items from two sections were tampered with by miscreants, their strict H&S rules might stipulate that they have to throw away everything on those two shelves.

I always pick up my intended egg box and open it to check for broken ones - making sure to gently wiggle them all to make sure they're loose, as sometimes they break underneath and you don't find out until you get them home and find they're firmly stuck in the box and make a huge mess (as well as losing some of what you've paid for)... but if I check an egg box and it isn't to my satisfaction, I just put it back and decline to buy it - like any product.

Presumably if there is a H&S rule like that, there is some reason for it. I would absolutely have reported - thieving scum

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:37

ReadingCrimeFiction · 06/04/2026 20:28

I have told members of staff when seeing this sort of thing before.... only to be rhe recipient of a shrug and a "there's nothing we can do and head office have told us not to challenge people like this and risk us getting hurt".

This lack of shame, and the corresponding knowledge that if we challenge it we risk ourselves, js a huge problem in our society and I worry about it a lot.

I challenged a man for leaving his rubbish on the train the other day. I wasnt rude or aggressive. He got very aggressive eith me and told me it wasnt his. I have no idea if he was telling the truth. I suspect not because if he was, surely a rational response would just be, "its not mine". I am not sure what he expected but I felt like he wanted to get into a physical altercation. I just ignored him. But it sums up the problem.

But you just said you didn’t know if it was him that dropped it?

I would only report someone if I saw them stealing

AntiqueBabyLoanSmurf · 06/04/2026 20:36

I don't understand the people saying to tell a member of staff. Firstly, they could get violent and/or abusive; secondly, they're surrounded by eggs, which would not be pleasant to be pelted with; and thirdly, if all they can be sure of is that some items from two sections were tampered with by miscreants, their strict H&S rules might stipulate that they have to throw away everything on those two shelves.

I always pick up my intended egg box and open it to check for broken ones - making sure to gently wiggle them all to make sure they're loose, as sometimes they break underneath and you don't find out until you get them home and find they're firmly stuck in the box and make a huge mess (as well as losing some of what you've paid for)... but if I check an egg box and it isn't to my satisfaction, I just put it back and decline to buy it - like any product.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:35

nevernotmaybe · 06/04/2026 20:32

Easy to live your life by that last sentence. Others care, and will put themselves out there to do so.

How quickly will you drop that idea if the consensus would hold it against you? It's not up for you judge the circumstances ICE would take someone away in the US, would you be there reporting people?

That’s a hell of a leap.
Consensus of whom? General public? MN? People I care about?

nevernotmaybe · 06/04/2026 20:32

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:20

Wow. You clearly missed your manners lessons.

Of course there are grey areas but unless you know the person who is doing the stealing you have no way of knowing why they are doing it. Someone stealing formula for example could be doing it to feed their child or they could be selling it on.

If I see it happen, I’m reporting it. The circumstances aren’t actually for me to determine.

Easy to live your life by that last sentence. Others care, and will put themselves out there to do so.

How quickly will you drop that idea if the consensus would hold it against you? It's not up for you judge the circumstances ICE would take someone away in the US, would you be there reporting people?

Batties · 06/04/2026 20:31

pinkstripeycat · 06/04/2026 19:43

I saw a couple with 2 older children load a trolley full in Morrisons and walk straight out. They swiped a Christmas tree as they left. No one stopped them and loads of people saw them go. They got in to their 2024 7-seater people carrier and left.

The same week, in the same supermarket, 4 male members of staff chased a homeless man around the store as he tried to steal a 2 pint carton of milk. He dropped it down his joggers and it fell out the bottom as it was so heavy. They kept chasing him and 2 of them piled on him before frog marching him out of the store.

How should people have stopped them?

If they did have a car, it would be on CCTV and the supermarket would have reported it to the police.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/04/2026 20:30

Actually I was wrong, I wouldn’t report someone old or if I knew they were homeless. I would however report anyone else (and have)

ReadingCrimeFiction · 06/04/2026 20:28

I have told members of staff when seeing this sort of thing before.... only to be rhe recipient of a shrug and a "there's nothing we can do and head office have told us not to challenge people like this and risk us getting hurt".

This lack of shame, and the corresponding knowledge that if we challenge it we risk ourselves, js a huge problem in our society and I worry about it a lot.

I challenged a man for leaving his rubbish on the train the other day. I wasnt rude or aggressive. He got very aggressive eith me and told me it wasnt his. I have no idea if he was telling the truth. I suspect not because if he was, surely a rational response would just be, "its not mine". I am not sure what he expected but I felt like he wanted to get into a physical altercation. I just ignored him. But it sums up the problem.

Midlifecrisisaverted · 06/04/2026 20:25

MrsEmmelinePankhurst · 06/04/2026 15:44

Not the point of your OP, but I’m hoping that somebody else had already done the egg swap with these exact same eggs, so that the CFs actually DID go home with the cheaper eggs rather than the (presumably) free range ones, as the “expensive” ones were actually cheap ones that had already been swapped 🤞🤞

I think non-free range eggs and chickens should be illegal. (Also not the point of your OP, sorry !)

CFs haunt the supermarkets where I live. I’ve seen people brazenly walking out with bottles of wine, packs of chicken breasts, packs of cheese etc… without batting an eyelid. Also at our local Lidl there are all the plants and bags of compost etc stacked up outside the store and people literally help themselves 🤦‍♀️

I daren't even not declare a carrier bag 😭 Did it for the first time about a month ago and was waiting to be arrested all the way home... Never again!

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 20:24

MrsDeltaB · 06/04/2026 17:36

In a former life I worked as admin in a magistrate’s court. I still remember the 83 year old fella who had been arrested on Sunday for shoplifting-the details of which are listed on court papers. Two chicken breasts, a small pack of spuds and a tin of mixed veg.

For some reason, this made me a little sad.

That's awful. I hope the magistrate found a way to find him not guilty, or if not then the court staff had a bag of shopping for him to take home with him when he left.

If the couple today had been sneaking a cheap box of eggs, loaf of bread and packet of ham I would have understood. The thing that got to me was the pettiness that they were willing to pay for eggs, but they wanted to end up with better eggs than they were paying for. It felt like one-upmanship rather than a couple on the breadline.

OP posts:
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