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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do people have no shame any more?

264 replies

tachetastic · 06/04/2026 15:38

I don't know if the worst part of this story is the fact that its theft or the fact people don't care.

I was in Tesco this morning buying eggs (the normal type, not chocolate) and a couple were standing by the egg display swapping the eggs from two half-dozen boxes of the fancy premium brand eggs into a box for 12 Tesco own-brand eggs. They weren't even being subtle about it. He was just standing there holding the boxes while she swapped the eggs over. He then double checked that the designer eggs she had put in the Tesco box were all unbroken, and then they put the expensive box containing the cheap eggs back on the shelf and put the cheap box with the expensive eggs in their trolley, and off they went.

During all of this I and three other customers were just standing openly watching them and casting glances at each other.

The difference in price was probably about 50p per box, so about a quid in total. But is that the point? Are the eggs so much better that it's worth a heist, or are people just so pissed off with the CoL crisis that anything they can do to feel that they are getting something for nothing is worth while?

The couple so clearly didn't care that I couldn't see the point in telling them it was theft, but when they left I moved the two boxes containing the cheap eggs to one side and left them open, so nobody would pick them up not realising they weren't the fancy eggs.

AIBU, this is fine and large supermarkets have it coming?

or AINBU, this is still theft and cheeky fuckery of the highest order?

And more interestingly, what cheeky fuckers have you seen lately who could beat this?

OP posts:
Hurrydash · 09/04/2026 23:33

OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 23:32

What is the point of these new guidelines? Whom do they benefit?

Shoplifters.

OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 23:32

What is the point of these new guidelines? Whom do they benefit?

Hurrydash · 09/04/2026 23:30

MyLimeGuide · 09/04/2026 19:26

Kier starmer wants to de-criminalise shoplifting. I think you can successfully steal up to £200 worth and get away with hit. What a hero that guy is!!

i think you are referring to the new shoplifter sentencing guidelines introduced by this Labour Government.
Estimates put the number of shoplifters likely to avoid a custodial sentence as a result in the many thousands.
I believe some of the details you cite are inaccurate but it does seem reasonable to describe the guidelines as a shoplifters charter.
How much Keir Starmer supports this change may be open to debate. He doesn’t really seem to be control of much of what this government is doing.

POTC · 09/04/2026 20:15

I'm manager of a charity shop. We've had to close the toilets because toilet rolls kept getting nicked, and last week someone nicked the coasters off the table in our small coffee area. Nothing surprises me now!

grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 20:12

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 19:34

@grumpygrape: He potentially put other people at risk.

Wasn't it the shoplifter who put other people at risk?

It was Walker Smith who instigated the physical interaction.

JustbrotherscarlenaNsoul · 09/04/2026 20:05

MyLimeGuide · 09/04/2026 19:26

Kier starmer wants to de-criminalise shoplifting. I think you can successfully steal up to £200 worth and get away with hit. What a hero that guy is!!

Don't know where you got that from as it isn't true.
A quick Google tells a different story.
Daily Mail perhaps pedelling more lies perhaps.

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 19:37

MyLimeGuide · 09/04/2026 19:26

Kier starmer wants to de-criminalise shoplifting. I think you can successfully steal up to £200 worth and get away with hit. What a hero that guy is!!

On the upside, that will save me a fortune on my weekly shopping.

Will you have to scan what you're stealing to make sure you don't take more than 200 quid a time, or is it assumed that thieves are honest?

OP posts:
tachetastic · 09/04/2026 19:34

grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 19:26

I don’t know, because, rightly, Waitrose won't comment on his specific case, but he has agreed/admitted he knew he shouldn’t have tackled the thief or thrown anything. He knew the rules. He potentially put other people at risk.

@grumpygrape: He potentially put other people at risk.

Wasn't it the shoplifter who put other people at risk?

OP posts:
MyLimeGuide · 09/04/2026 19:31

OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 19:30

Well that's Starmer for you. Useless and with no respect for the normal law-abiding, hard-working person.

Agree.

OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 19:30

MyLimeGuide · 09/04/2026 19:26

Kier starmer wants to de-criminalise shoplifting. I think you can successfully steal up to £200 worth and get away with hit. What a hero that guy is!!

Well that's Starmer for you. Useless and with no respect for the normal law-abiding, hard-working person.

MyLimeGuide · 09/04/2026 19:26

OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 19:09

There needs to be a major crackdown on shoplifting, and shoplifters should be sent to jail, every time. Even for just a Freddo or a grape.

Kier starmer wants to de-criminalise shoplifting. I think you can successfully steal up to £200 worth and get away with hit. What a hero that guy is!!

grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 19:26

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 19:20

@grumpygrape: How many times does an employer have to warn an employee, who agreed he already knew he was breaking the rules, before ending their employment ?

I don't know. How many times did they warn him? Four or five? Two or three? Any?

I don’t know, because, rightly, Waitrose won't comment on his specific case, but he has agreed/admitted he knew he shouldn’t have tackled the thief or thrown anything. He knew the rules. He potentially put other people at risk.

grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 19:23

OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 19:09

There needs to be a major crackdown on shoplifting, and shoplifters should be sent to jail, every time. Even for just a Freddo or a grape.

Shop thieves come in all shapes and sizes. I think there should be more support for drug abuse which is one of the key drivers for theft from shops. I don’t think incarceration works for addicts.

I have no data but would suggest theft out of necessity is low, to sell on to feed addiction is higher, and the highest loss is probably from planned organised crime gangs.

CCTV and communications are helping Police tackle the organised gangs but as they are able to commit crime and move on geographically so quickly it’s difficult to tackle.

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 19:20

@grumpygrape: How many times does an employer have to warn an employee, who agreed he already knew he was breaking the rules, before ending their employment ?

I don't know. How many times did they warn him? Four or five? Two or three? Any?

OP posts:
OonaStubbs · 09/04/2026 19:09

There needs to be a major crackdown on shoplifting, and shoplifters should be sent to jail, every time. Even for just a Freddo or a grape.

grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 19:05

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 12:54

I think it's a question of degree of response. They should have made clear to him that what he did was against their rules and perhaps even given him a warning. But at the end of the day, he was doing what he thought was the right thing to do, even if it was against the rules, and that should have been recognised.

Waitrose is also a huge company and as part of the John Lewis group prides itself on how well it treats its staff. It misread the room massively in this case. People generally have had enough with people thinking they can take things because people are too afraid to act, so to throw the book at a loyal staff member who made a bad decision with the best of intentions was downright stupid and they need to be criticised for that.

How many times does an employer have to warn an employee, who agreed he already knew he was breaking the rules, before ending their employment ?

Don’t forget he admitted to a physical tussle and throwing something, either of which actions could have harmed an innocent bystander.

Waitrose/John Lewis have to consider their position from a ‘what if a customer, or that member of staff, had been harmed in the tussle or by something being thrown’ position.

Some shop thieves carry all sorts of weapons nowadays and shop staff must consider the safety of innocent customers as well as their own safety.

Wot23 · 09/04/2026 14:17

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 12:54

I think it's a question of degree of response. They should have made clear to him that what he did was against their rules and perhaps even given him a warning. But at the end of the day, he was doing what he thought was the right thing to do, even if it was against the rules, and that should have been recognised.

Waitrose is also a huge company and as part of the John Lewis group prides itself on how well it treats its staff. It misread the room massively in this case. People generally have had enough with people thinking they can take things because people are too afraid to act, so to throw the book at a loyal staff member who made a bad decision with the best of intentions was downright stupid and they need to be criticised for that.

I agree that dismissal is heavy handed but with employment law the way it is the employer must have had impeccable grounds for "gross misconduct" per the employee rules to have gone as far as dismissal rather than a "warning".

Obviously we do not know if there is backstory that has not been made public. I am NOT implying there is one.

tachetastic · 09/04/2026 12:54

grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 10:44

I think a lot of people are wrongly criticising Waitrose. Walker Smith admitted he knew he was going against the rules when he physically tackled the shoplifter he also admitted he threw something at the person as they left, in frustration.

Broke the rules, could have got himself, the shoplifter or customers injured in the physical tussle and then with throwing something.
Walker Smith wasn’t even a security guard and knew he was breaking rules. The shoplifter could have been like this one who stabbed a security guard. It’s just not safe to tackle people and be a have a go hero.

I think it's a question of degree of response. They should have made clear to him that what he did was against their rules and perhaps even given him a warning. But at the end of the day, he was doing what he thought was the right thing to do, even if it was against the rules, and that should have been recognised.

Waitrose is also a huge company and as part of the John Lewis group prides itself on how well it treats its staff. It misread the room massively in this case. People generally have had enough with people thinking they can take things because people are too afraid to act, so to throw the book at a loyal staff member who made a bad decision with the best of intentions was downright stupid and they need to be criticised for that.

OP posts:
grumpygrape · 09/04/2026 10:44

I think a lot of people are wrongly criticising Waitrose. Walker Smith admitted he knew he was going against the rules when he physically tackled the shoplifter he also admitted he threw something at the person as they left, in frustration.

Broke the rules, could have got himself, the shoplifter or customers injured in the physical tussle and then with throwing something.
Walker Smith wasn’t even a security guard and knew he was breaking rules. The shoplifter could have been like this one who stabbed a security guard. It’s just not safe to tackle people and be a have a go hero.

Shoplifter jailed for stabbing security guard outside Preston store

https://news.lancashire.police.uk/news/2025/october/shoplifter-who-stabbed-security-guard-in-preston-jailed-for-more-than-22-years/

Hurrydash · 09/04/2026 01:04

Waitrose policy on not having staff challenge shoplifting is in my opinion nuts. However that’s up to them.

I guess any blackguards finding this out will feel free to go into their nearest store and help themselves.

However, I would question the commercial sense of sacking an employee of 17 years for challenging a shoplifter.

Have the decision makers there not heard of social media? Waitrose reputation has taken a very hard PR knock. All the more so now Iceland have offered the victim of their incompetence a job.

Maybe Waitrose need to take a long hard look in the mirror.

AntiqueBabyLoanSmurf · 08/04/2026 14:34

SquallyShowersLater · 07/04/2026 19:14

On a recent shopping trip I saw an elderly gentleman browsing the alcohol aisle and later he walked past me at the checkout clearly carrying a clinking carrier bag.

Are you sure he didn't pay though? I regularly load up my own bag with stuff when I am doing a light shop and don't need a trolley, because I find it easier and more comfortable to carry than the wire baskets. But I simply empty it out at the till and pay for everything then load it all in again. If the staff want to stalk me around the shop, worried I might be stealing, or watch me on cameras they are very welcome to. I don't steal and they can't assume I do until I actually leave without paying, which I don't.

But do you nevertheless tell the staff or other customers that you are stealing it, like this chap?!

AntiqueBabyLoanSmurf · 08/04/2026 14:32

Wheelchairbarbie · 07/04/2026 16:39

It's not easy to be on here cracking jokes no one appreciates.
Well done for not chickening out

It's a pity that it wasn't a bunch of CF blokes doing it in Tesco in Dundee - then we could have referred to them as 'Alba men' at no extra charge.

<gets coat>

JMSA · 07/04/2026 19:51

AntiqueBabyLoanSmurf · 07/04/2026 16:45

I read that out loud in Hyacinth's voice Grin

😂

SquallyShowersLater · 07/04/2026 19:14

On a recent shopping trip I saw an elderly gentleman browsing the alcohol aisle and later he walked past me at the checkout clearly carrying a clinking carrier bag.

Are you sure he didn't pay though? I regularly load up my own bag with stuff when I am doing a light shop and don't need a trolley, because I find it easier and more comfortable to carry than the wire baskets. But I simply empty it out at the till and pay for everything then load it all in again. If the staff want to stalk me around the shop, worried I might be stealing, or watch me on cameras they are very welcome to. I don't steal and they can't assume I do until I actually leave without paying, which I don't.

4kids2cats · 07/04/2026 18:23

MrsEmmelinePankhurst · 06/04/2026 15:44

Not the point of your OP, but I’m hoping that somebody else had already done the egg swap with these exact same eggs, so that the CFs actually DID go home with the cheaper eggs rather than the (presumably) free range ones, as the “expensive” ones were actually cheap ones that had already been swapped 🤞🤞

I think non-free range eggs and chickens should be illegal. (Also not the point of your OP, sorry !)

CFs haunt the supermarkets where I live. I’ve seen people brazenly walking out with bottles of wine, packs of chicken breasts, packs of cheese etc… without batting an eyelid. Also at our local Lidl there are all the plants and bags of compost etc stacked up outside the store and people literally help themselves 🤦‍♀️

On a recent shopping trip I saw an elderly gentleman browsing the alcohol aisle and later he walked past me at the checkout clearly carrying a clinking carrier bag. And two men in the coffee aisle were discussing how expensive coffee is and one said “Well only if you pay for it”. The other asked what he meant and he shrugged and said “I just take it”.