is my husband right?

I think you support your children to achieve their ambitions and activities, as far as is possible. Obviously, there can be financial or time restrictions, but if it is possible I think we should do it.

My DC’s take part in sport which requires traipsing up and down the country (with horses in tow) and spending a fortune to do so. It’s had so many benefits- the obvious of being active, developing discipline and resilience, learning about commitment and team working etc- but also less “obvious” positives. Such as taking responsibility for organising their studies around their sporting commitments- they are competing at a high level, but aren’t going to be going to go on to do it professionally, so are very aware that if their academic outcomes start to suffer due to it, we’ll curtail the sport. Also, due to travelling and being away we’ve spent had lots of time togetherwith few “outs” and this has been an opportunity to have some really lovely chats about all sorts of things and improved our relationship more than I would ever have appreciated. They also appreciate the time spent with them and the sacrifices DH & I have made, and so on. So, I’d say if you can do it for your son, then you should- he’ll always remember that you gave him opportunities.

At this stage it sounds like you (well your DS) has nothing to use by attending the trial and seeing what happens.

If he does get accepted, presumably the academy will be fully aware that teen boys grow in fits and spurts and are different shapes and sizes, and will be able to manage that?

if your husband's main concerns are logistical, I think this is the time to have a serious talk with your son. If he wants this opportunity, what can he expect from you, what can he not expect from you? If he is serious this might mean (for example) him having to take public transport even though it is slower, having to give up other hobbies to devote more time etc. Is he prepared to do those things?

At a loss to understand why a father would not take his son and supports his dreams even if they come to nothing. Your husband is a poor excuse for a parent.

Is your husband usually lazy and selfish?

My son is a similar age and build to yours and v sporty and I do everything in my power to get him to his various clubs, he loves it. His dad bellyache a bit about him missing family stuff but it makes him so happy, plus he has made great friends through sport and is out living life rather thsn on a screen. All pluses as far as Im concerned. Good for him.

My DS is in an academy and it is hard work and takes up a lot of time. So few of the boys actually make it, but they all love it. If you’re not 100% committed, and it really does have to be the entire family that are committed, it’s worth it. Your son will resent you both if you don’t let him though.

I guess for me it depends if it’s actually logistically possible. Can your husband actually manage the driving? Are there buses? My kids are super busy but we have stuff for each of them every night and one car so we are maxed out logistically.

He has an opportunity that he would love to take?
I can't understand why your DH is against it
I mean, I know zero about football, but it seems he already plays in a team, but a better team want to give him a trial?

If you don't let him, in the future he'll resent that fact that he'll never know what could have been.

I don't think any time spent helping your children do something they love is wasted. I think your husband is being a bit lazy because he doesn't want to take him around. This is a fantastic opportunity, especially since they've called him back. I wouldn't want to waste that.

I would support my child if they had a passion and were good at it. My dd does a sport 5/6 times a week including very early mornings, weekends and competitions far away.

What is missing from your post is your son’s wishes. What does he want to do?