AIBU to consider a date with a man who is sectioned under the MH act

I can't see what the harm in having a date with him would be. It's not as if you are moving him in with your DC and marrying him next week. You are aware of his issues and are accordingly wary - this is a healthy sign. As long as you can keep appropriate boundaries and are in a good state mentally yourself, and you like his company, then why not?

What? This literally happens every day. Why do you think it’s so outrageous?

My god, I have been sectioned many times and at no time was there was any question about me being able to consent to a relationship. "Can he consent?".. fucking hell.

Personally, I would be waiting until they were home, because when you are in hospital, the priority should be getting well and not forming a new romantic relationship. Although there is nothing wrong with wanting a relationship when you are in hospital.. it would just be an extra pressure.
Maybe just be friends for now and see how things go.
Good luck.

What do you mean why? The reasons people get sectioned are pretty benign. Refusal of treatment, potential danger to themselves or others. It’s not like going to prison where there is some potential moral judgement to be made. It’s medical treatment.

This would wildly depend on why he’s sectioned for me and his relationship history.

Am I being delusional ?

Yes. You aren't supposed to date anyone from support groups. It's one of the main rules as you could spiral each other. Walk away.

This
I am not against dating someone who has been sectioned. Mental health crisis can happen to anyone..
I feel it would be better to wait for crisis to recover

Be his friend for now op. It’s always good to have contacts who have been through something similar. He will probably be quite fragile for a while but you will likely be a good support for each other if you keep to some boundaries.

What an utterly horrible response. What’s your knowledge of people who have been sectioned? Why do you also mention homelessness? Let’s hope you and your close one’s never experience something like this.

@babypickles Given that you have similar issues OP, you might be the right person to understand him and his circumstances better than others. I think you need to first be friends and obviously let him settle in his new living arrangement. Take it slowly, keep yourself safe and see how it goes.

It's hard to comment without knowing more.

I was admitted to hospital for severe PND, I started on medication, received support from a psychologist and stabilised. This doesn't in anyway mean I wouldn't be capable of being a loving and supportive partner, made a full recovery.

A close friend had bipolar and takes her meds but has struggled to maintain a relationship - when she goes through relapses she needs space to be on her own to recharge and recover, sometimes for days or weeks, she isn't able to speak to or engage with others during these phases, and partners have found that hard, and the emotional ups and down of relationships are also destabilising for her, so she has chosen to remain single.

This person may have had a single mental health episode triggered by a trauma and may make a full recovery. Or they may continue to need medication but be able to fully function with this. Or they may be in an unstable cycle?

@babypickles seeing as you met him through a support group what is your mental health like. And don’t answer that , I’m asking rhetorically. I just want
you to think could you cope with a vulnerable partner if your mental health is also less than stable?

Before I met my DH, I dated a really lovely man who’d been in and out of mental hospital his whole life. It had ruined his first marriage and his relationship with his young children. I decided that life was not for me, or one that I could inflict on my kids. He went on to marry again, is now divorced again. It’s not something that you should be aiming for in a relationship.

If you're sectioned you're not really in control of your life in any shape or form. You're bound to the ward and it's rules so I don't think it would be easy to start a meaningful relationship. You're also considered to not be capable of making reasonable decisions about your day to day life.

I would say friendship yes, but anything serious I'd only consider once the person was well enough to live in the community.

Even then I'd proceed with caution as being with someone who is unwell enough to need inpatient treatment, they might not ever be able to fully recover.

Being with someone very mentally unwell can be extremely distressing and negativity impact your own MH sadly.

Also think it’s really inappropriate for OP and others to be joking about being delusional 🙄

What sort of section is he under and what is his background?

some people are so poorly for life that a romantic relationship is pretty much you being a carer. Some people love to be needed like that, of course.

some people are sectioned after being extremely unwell and recover to live a full life

However, it sounds like your potential date is on a 6 month section. It seems unlikely this id his first section which indicates a very poorly man who is or will be in and out for life.

My DH has 2 siblings who have schizophrenia and bipolar. One takes the medication that is prescribed and leads a very normal life, has a full time job and you would never know she had any mental illness. She has been sectioned several times about 10+ years ago, she then got a definite diagnosis and prescribed medication and has been fine since. I wouldn't describe her as vulnerable.
His DB has the same diagnosis but refuses to take medication and every year like clockwork he has an episode that requires sectioning, sometimes for up to two months (it's prolonged as he refuses medication once he's in a position to consent). In the first weeks of him being an inpatient he would not be in any fit state to be in a relationship, even if it's just over text. After the episode calms he is fairly 'normal' and has full capacity, but they always keep him in for longer to try to convince him medicate. Apart from the psychotic episode, which lasts 3 days-2 weeks, I wouldn't say he's vulnerable more a PITA.

Oh I have a friend know someone like this. Gets involved in ridiculous relationships thinking she can ‘fix’ them; and is then surprised when it’s not plain sailing,
OP - you don’t know him. You know severely mentally unwell him. I’d say be a friend to him but you seem like hard work so maybe do him a favour and leave him be.

Some very nasty and ignorant comments here btw.

I had a relationship with a man who at points in the time we were together was sectioned.

I was very yoing and looking back it wasn't wise on my part.

He was very fragile and vulnerable and of course extremely up and down both emotionally and in his recovery

Could you consider being a friend for now ? And see how his recovery goes

Where is your self esteem that you are seriously thinking of dating someone who is objectively VERY mentally unwell and unlikely to be a stable partner for a very long time?

Why would you choose to become embroiled in such inevitable drama?