Do nursing staff not wash patients anymore or change sheets?

Fine. But this chimes with the experience of my friend who trained as a nurse a few years ago. The first few months of her course were online, took only a couple of days a week and were just tick box questionnaires about disability and diversity training. She had already worked as a nursing auxiliary and her view by the end of her training was that there was a massive gap between theory and practice. She went into private nursing.

They were going to let you insert a suppository??

I don’t think it’s nurses who do the actual nursing now, is it?

Nurses seem to do more medical stuff, whereas the ones in green do healthcare and the ones in red, who are on the ward a lot, it seems to me, do the sweeping floors, bringing tea and noticing things.

She’s been hospitalised with meningitis, ffs! How is she supposed to “advocate for herself” when she is so sick? 🙄

@keepswimming38 Someone - nurse or HCA - absolutely should be changing her sheets. And no, it shouldn’t have to be you. You are not being unreasonable at all. I’m sorry your daughter is going through this. I hope she makes a swift recovery. Sending love to you. X

This. Post birth I was in the bed I’ve given birth on with most of the associated gunk for over 24 hours before they changed it.. I kept asking for them to help me to the shower and change my bed but they were always ‘too busy’. I eventually got help when the breast feeding nurse came to talk to be about breast feeding. I basically said ‘stuff that’ please help me to the shower. I promptly collapsed as I got out of bed (had lost a lot of blood) and she got me in the shower. I then heard her doing a horrified stage whisper to some member of staff to come and change my bedding as it was a real mess. I ended up thinking the NHS is like a third world country and they expect friends and relatives to do the ‘grunt work’.

My partner had stayed until 9pm the previous day but because I had a drip for most of it they wouldn’t let me shower and then when it was removed was told I would be going up to the ward ‘soon’ and I could shower there. DP was taking paternity after I left hospital due to the mistaken belief I would be looked after whilst there and it was better he was available for when I came out. I also have never understood some people’s obsession with having a private room (which is what I had on that occasion) as it’s even more of an excuse to forget about/ignore you.

Some nurses really can’t be arsed!

It’s not that nurses “can’t be arsed” it’s that the role has fundamentally changed over the past 30–40 years. Modern nursing is far more complex and clinically focused than it used to be.

Registered nurses are now responsible for care planning, discharge coordination (often starting on admission), referrals to allied health professionals, MDT working, supervising students and newly qualified staff, administering medications (including IV therapy), and maintaining detailed, legally accountable documentation. At the same time, patients are more acutely unwell and have increasingly complex needs.
When you factor in chronic staffing shortages and resource constraints, it simply isn’t always possible for nurses to deliver all elements of hands-on personal care alongside these responsibilities.

That said, compassionate care absolutely matters, and it should never feel absent, that’s a valid concern and something the profession continues to reflect on and improve.
HCA's key role is providing personal care, allowing the RN to complete the care he/she is qualified to do.

There is also, at times, a tendency in the UK to view nursing through somewhat rose-tinted glasses focusing on how the role used to be, without fully recognising how much it has advanced and expanded. Alongside that, nurses often feel there is less appreciation of the complexity and responsibility of the modern role compared to some other countries.

I do agree that the standard of hospital food in the UK is very poor, and that has real implications for patients with conditions like heart failure and diabetes. Nutrition should be treated as part of clinical care, not an afterthought. I'm from an EU country where catering is done in house and patients choose their meals from a menu. Meals are also tailored for those with diabetes, cardiac and renal issues.

I know that nobody on my ward could shower because they were virtually bed bound. Ortho trauma so broken hips, legs etc.

As soon as they can get to and use bathroom unaided then they kick them out. So a lot of them probably didn't bathe for the week they were there. But most were only there a week or so.

Nurses changed sheets if someone peed the bed. But I didn't notice them doing it otherwise.

Except I had an RMN and could shower as had been there weeks, so while I was showering my RMN would change my bed. But until I could shower nurses didn't offer to bed bathe me.

I had one lovely friend and when she was leaving I gave her a hug and she smelled really bad. So the answer is no, they don't really bathe you or help you wash.

The ‘child’ in this case is 20, and if she’s anything like my own young adult DD then there’s absolutely no way that she’d want her mother helping with personal care. DD had major surgery aged 17 and required bed baths, catheter care etc for a few days afterwards both in high dependancy & on the ward. The nurses & HCAs did it (without asking!) in the most dignified way possible. I’m a HCP and there’s no way that I or any of my colleagues would assume that a parent should do all of the personal care for their 20yo. It’s inappropriate.

I hope your daughter gets well soon OP

So you're talking about a drip and machines not just a cannula. The cannula is just the needle in your arm/hand

No not normal.

They should be helping with washing (i.e she does some bits and they help her with what she can't manage) or bed bathing depending on what your daughter can manage currently. They should be changing her sheets daily because of infection control measures. This can be done by an HCA, but if she is weak and needs help rolling over in bed it will need 2 people minimum. They normally do this first thing in the morning. Nurses are all trained to do this and have to help the HCA's as there are not enough staff to wash everyone who needs assistance otherwise.

They should be recording her food and fluid intake in a chart especially if her intake is low, the HCA should do this but her named nurse should be monitoring it. It should be in the nursing documentation, you can ask to see it with your daughter's permission.

When my usually self caring husband was in hospital with Covid he was bed bound and too weak to wash himself, the nursing staff did it as we were not allowed on the ward. When I was in HDU they washed me when I was bed bound and offered to help with a shower once I was mobile after surgery. Staff have washed my mobile elderly father using a bowl of water on all his hospital stays.

In paeds they will expect you to do what you would normally do for your child re: feeding and bathing using the shower/bath on the ward, but if they are very unwell or have mobility issues then they will bed bath them. They should be changing the sheets for the child, but often parents just do it anyway as they put their own parent beds away for the day or if the baby soils or vomits. I didn't mind doing this with my kids as I would do it at home anyway.

Definitely complain and request that these things are done.

Dd was in for a week a few years ago aged 17 and didn’t have a change of sheets once. She ate 3 meals a day in that bed, was offered a shower every other day inbetween drips. I genuinely didn’t realise I could have asked for the sheets and done it myself otherwise I would have.
I remember years before when my mum was in, her sheets were changed daily in the morning - I honestly presumed that was still the case until on about day 4 when dd said her sheets were getting a bit smelly.

Can I ask what research you’ve done on nurse training? If it from reading the daily mail/express then I’d suggest you try to go a little deeper into a subject you seem to know very little about.

Won't stuff like bowel movements and eating be recorded on a patient's notes? So no need for staff to ask the patient. Last time I was in hospital overnight washing (bed bath or offer of assistance to shower) was done quite early in the morning, definitely long before visitors came in. Think beds normally changed then too. Of course, if OP has been at her daughter's bedside for 20 hours a day then she will have a better idea what care has been offered.

at no point are you told on a NHS paeds ward that you are expected to provide hand on care

Very few parents who are sat with their child need to be told to change a nappy, or to keep them clean or to help them eat. Generally parents choose to stay with their child because they are ill and often frightened by such novel surroundings but if you can't stay then of course staff will care for your child (if all parents unilaterally decided to go home there would undoubtedly be a problem but usually it's just a few who are absent at any given time)

@TheFaithfulWeaver ”I do still think the pools of her blood and pus along the corridors should have been cleaned up in a 5 hour window.”

You’re not wrong, no one should have to risk catching hepatitis just by walking along a hospital corridor. Some of these stories are horrendous too.

We need staff and there are people out there who still want to do this work, anyone seen the student midwives story recently? Maternity care is getting worse with more dying ffs. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4g6p5ge617o

It really isn’t worth working hard in this country with the horrendous fees to train and low wages - nurses are not on enough for what they have to do or their responsibilities. That’s probably why the new ones have to have their eyes on advancement, @livedexperienceangel

It does not seem as if complaints and warnings of unsafe care mean anything to our politicians they have let us down for decades.

This country is going down the plug hole because of the bleeding out of public funds by the richest. Bernie Sanders has it right about America, we of course have copied America for years. We pay less per capita for the NHS than France or Germany do for their healthcare. Beats me how they claim we are unproductive when we’re running around all day, I think it’s all lies. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2026/apr/01/billionaire-wealth-tax-trump

As PP said if you have a child hooked up to 3 drips, heart, oxygen monitors and more, how in hell was I supposed to wash or dress him or change the sheet for the third or fourth time again.
And even with a less significant illness at no point are you told on a NHS peads ward that you are expected to provide hands on care. For people who have never experienced life in a hospital ward before then, its a huge learning curve. The reality that you can't work, are on 24/7 care duty while on the wards and are strongly discouraged from leaving, but will not be fed or watered is crazy. With no sleep cause of cryingchildren, parents and endless beepingmonitors. Either get better staffing or tell parents the reality.

I am sorry to hear this and I wish your daughter a speedy recovery.
To share my personal experience, I was in hospital for a couple of weeks early last year before and after giving birth. I was in a private room both times. I generally found the midwives and care assistants to be very helpful, I am blind so needed extra support when I was in hospital alone for a week pre-birth, though my husband stayed with me for the week post-partem so the staff didn't need to help me much with personal care after birth. A CA came in every day to clean the bathroom, empty bins, etc. The only problem was that my sheets were never changed. I slept in the bloody sheets I had come back from theatre after my c-section in for most of the week I spent there, only being changed when I finally got up the courage to mention it to one of the staff the day before we were going to leave. In the staff's defence, we ended up staying there longer than expected due to non-medical reasons so they might have thought the sheets had already been changed or that we were leaving the next day so no need to do it. Also, I suppose my husband and I really should have said something if nobody had noticed, I think we just didn't want to make a fuss and I guess we had other priorities as slightly shell-shocked new parents! It's really only now that I look back at that and think that sleeping in blood-stained dirty sheets for a week while trying to nurse a newborn and recovering from abbdominal surgery may not have been the most hygienic situation!
My advice is not to be as reticent as we were, I think it absolutely falls within the remit of ward staff, nurses or care assistants, to help your daughter with personal care and changing sheets, so, if this isn't being done, please go ahead and ask for it. I know you shouldn't have to ask but my own experience shows that's the only way things get done sometimes.

This is one of the crassest comments I've seen on MN and it's a competitive field.
I'm guessing you have never been gravely ill.

I'm sorry your daughter is so ill OP and I'm glad you can be there. When you are very ill it affects mind and body whatever your age. You don't have the capacity to "advocate" for yourself, you can barely think.
I was in hospital with a serious infection a few years ago and I could barely remember my name I was so ill. Definitely ask, loudly, I think you'll find they rush to do it.

It's actually nothing new, I remember DS1 being in hospital 30 years ago and there was no personal care given. The only "nursing" was doing OBS. He was slightly different as he was a baby at the time and it seemed that the parents were expected to do it. One poor mother, a lone parent, had three other children and she was forced to leave her sick baby. None one member of staff went to that child day or night when he cried.

I’m sorry to hear she’s so unwell OP, you must be so worried about her. I hope she’s back on her feet as soon as possible.

I think your daughter would probably prefer your personal care rather than the nurses, but I do understand where you are coming from.

I think that what's so awful about NHS at minute - you'll either get really good care or awful and there's no way to know before hand .

If you talk about awful things relatives and we have experiences some poster construe that as bashing NHS staff.

Dsis and I both complained to Pals and others about poor manterity care in our respective areas - result was we got worse care - so with elderly relatives we couldn't be there 24/7 with no we didn't complain - and then after sometimes we have but if there been deaths well it's not top of your mind. Then it's somehow your fault for not complaining - or not peristsing with complaints - not that a basic level of care should be standard.

I' don't know if it's a money or staff issue because even now wards in same hopsitals some seem able to do basic care others don't.

Undoubtedly but the care still needs to be done. It seems from this thread that quite a lot on a ward is due to the senior nurse running it and their expectations. It would also seem that expectations on some wards definitely need to be raised.

Nursing has evolved. It's generally the HCAs job to be changing sheets and to be involved in personal care, but they've probably all gone to work in a newly opened Aldi for better pay and less responsibility.

People need to be careful what they wish for. Complaints about doctors being paid too much, now nurses take on some of that responsibility and have passed lots of personal care to HCAs. Complaints over how much bank/agency staff are being paid. As a result wards are expected to work short staffed rather than use agency/bank. Complaints the NHS costs too much. NHS has to find efficiency savings (some are looking at over 20% for their CIPs this year). Well then you can't have sheets changed every day. Sheet washing is all contracted out, so washing less saves money, etc etc.

Agree with this
Nursing is a lot more complex than it was in the "call the midwife " era