Who was in the wrong here?

OP, it makes me smile that you say you're not taking sides, but then make it very obvious whose side you're on with 'A took great offence' and 'A won't let it go'.

That said I totally agree with you and I can't hide my feelings either.

I advise you to avoid poker.

The person leaving did jokingly say to B “you owe me a speech” and B replied with “I haven’t had enough to drink yet!”

The whole office needs to give its head a big fat wobble. And the managers need to jump hard on any heads that want to keep on fighting this stupid fight.

It was perfectly fine for both to give leabing speeches.

It sounds as though one was quite formal and "official" and the other was more personal. If this reflected each speaker's relationship with the persn leaving this was perfectly appropriate.

A & B need to get over themselves, and your managers need to sort the dispute (preferably by telling people they are all growed up now and should put away childish things).

Nothing wrong with more than one person making a speech at any event. It would be weird if there was only one person to speak at a wedding, funeral etc. If anyone makes a speech at a birthday or retirement party or any other event, I think it’s fine for others to say a little something too.

It sounds like A wanted to be the centre of attention and felt that B was stealing their thunder. But it wasn’t their party, the guest of honor was someone else. A was UR imo.

It's such stupid immature and unprofessional behaviour from A regardless of who was "in the right" it's not really a big deal (or shouldn't be)

Sounds like an episode from the Office.

I hope A realises that nobody gives a damn about the speeches after the event, but everyone will remember them kicking off and causing a row.

What was said in the row anyway? “I’ve known them longer than you”, “well my jokes got more laughs”…..? Can we assume much alcohol had been consumed by this stage??? 🤣

On the face of it who really cares, but it may have seemed that B was trying to one up or undermine A. We can't know unless we were there. Best to just move on.

A is in the wrong. It was supposed to be a nice thing for a colleague so if B had some nice things to say then why shouldn’t they. A is a self centred dick making it about them instead of the colleague who was leaving.

Sounds a bit like the scene from Bridesmaids where Annie and Helen are fighting over the microphone to do the speeches.

The colleague who’s left has had a lucky escape from A and B it sounds. Weirdos.

Both are slightly at fault, they obvs don’t get along and there’s rivalry there. A should get over it but B shouldn’t have reacted to the bait and certainly not get it get to sides taken in an office.

A is being very precious, which is often because of an insecurity. Anyone who takes themselves that seriously is quite sad imho.

B did nothing wrong.

Depends on the dynamics in the office. In the surface of it it’s no big deal but the B in my office would do this sort of things as a point scoring exercise. She thinks she’s the best at everything.

I think I would have been inclined to think B a bit of a twat to make an additional speech unless it was materially different in content/purpose. Otherwise it seems a bit like trying to make out A's speech was lacking and also a bit "look at me, aren't I great".

My friend's knob of a brother did that at her wedding started making his own speech right after the best man. Those on our table rolled their eyes. I've known him since school and he's such a show off who just loves the sound of his own voice.

On the other hand maybe A is the knob. Sounds like B was closer to the leaver and leaver actually wanted B to speak. So perhaps A was unreasonable by grabbing the task due to a petty rivalry with B. Might explain why A was so openly pissed off when B made a speech anyway.

This explains why B did the speech later, so i don't think they did anything wrong. They were clearly close. Was one of them more directly managing the leaving colleague than the other? A sounds ridiculous.

B definitely implied by doing a speech later that A's speech wasn't enough in some way. It would be fine if she'd said 'A's already given you our thanks but I want to add my personal thanks and share..x y, z...' or even 'I promised [leaver] I'd say something when they left so here's my story about when...'

But to just stand up as if A never had is weird.

The real victory here goes to the colleague who no longer has to put up with this BS

I suspect A can't stand B for other reasons and this really put them out. If I was A and this person did a speech as you describe and I had little respect for B (think of the biggest dickhead at your work) then I would be annoyed. But I also would recognise that the annoyance was subjective and I might privately msg a friend who also thought B was a dick and make a smart ass comment. Or go home and tell dh or a friend about this work idiot. Absolutely no way would I approach B and get confrontational about it. I also wouldn't tell other colleagues that is annoyed me as I would be aware of how juvenile it sounds.

If I was B and innocently (while pissed) made a speech to be met with A's anger i would probably think A was being ridiculous but I would still say 'sorry I didn't mean to offend' and move on. I wouldn't involve colleagues and make a thing of it. However if B did react appropriately and its only A keeps going on about, it then I'm all team B.

If they are both going on about it and trying to recruit supporters I would lose all respect for both. They are making massive fools of themselves.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

What kind of arsehole gets upset because two people said nice things about a colleague instead of one?

How can that possibly be a bad thing?

This is what I think. There may be stuff the OP is not aware of, even if they share an office. Or alternatively, there is some other conflict, and it’s not about undermining, just that A and B dislike each other.

In my experience at these dos, there's a little pause for speeches and a presentation, and then that's it, back to eating/drinking/dancing whatever till the end of the evening. It was really rather odd of B to pop up and make a speech when speeches were well and truly over, and I would have found it rather cringey.

However, that would really be the end of it. It's probably far from the only embarrassing thing someone has done at an office event, and normally most people would forget about it within a couple of days at most. I can't see any reason for A to take massive offence or for anyone to get into a war about it. If anything, A could take the high ground and just laugh about how B made a bit of an idiot of themselves.

A is being a dick! 🤷‍♀️

Why was A offended by Bs speech?
Would A have been offended by any second speech or this one particularly?
What was it that offended A specifically?

sorry, whole…