How to treat children in a coaching environment

Ah the guardian says it so it must be true
god this place used to be funny with some chatty interesting threads from thoughtful articulate posters
now it's this sort of bollocks

I have two sensitive children and they would not be upset with any of this. There is a big variation of high fives and jokes etc. One coach makes my daughter do a high five high up out of her reach so she has to jump. Buddy is no issue either. it all sounds absolutely fine.

It’s an odd approach to look up buddy or she high fiveing was invented.

Both are fine - buddy is friendly. The ‘too slow’ malarkey has been about for ages. I think sports coaching for 6, 7 😉 year olds is less formal than you are used to and perhaps you would be suited to something else.

I have started working in a sporting teaching environment with children

The best thing for everyone concerned here would be if you found something else to do.

Your thinking is so twisted, dramatic and downright unfathomable about such mundane non-issues it really doesn't seem like a good fit for you.

If the coach is liked, does good coaching and isn't doing anything that would be a safeguarding conncern, then he is entitled to coach in his own style.

I was pulled up for being ride by another coach. I am not rude and no-one else thought I was being rude, it's just how I am (ND, so less filter than some) and it's very good-natured.

It didn't suit her, that's fine but her coaching style irritates me, so I have moved on from doing sessions at the same time as her. Neither of us is wrong, we're just different and we will probably appeal to different people.

Buddy is fine. It's nice and neutral.

People can be different, that's life.

Calling a pet name "horrific" is a ridiculous overreaction. As is thinking there's something wrong with playing the "too slow" high five game which has been around at least as long as I have (born in the 80s) I highly doubt anyone has been left traumatised by being too slow to high five someone 🤦

This is an opinion piece, in effect, you seem to be citing it as some sort of evidence?

Also on the coaching - my son’s football coaches use mates and buddy all the time - it’s not school and it’s a great way to build rapport in a team. I don’t think we could use you as a coach 😀

Buddy has been around for eons. As has guys, mate, people etc. I feel like you are quite literally looking for offence here. Using a word you do not like does not equate to "the decline of the English language".

And ‘Buddy’? Definitely a horrific Americanism!

I think maybe you should reflect on why, in your mind, a harmless, friendly way to address someone is 'horrific' just because it's most commonly used in a different country. The rabid anti-American comments on MN actually make my jaw drop sometimes. I'm not American, but there are Americans on MN. They must find it very unpleasant.

If I had complained about that to my parents when I was 7, they would have suggested that I should get a grip.

If any of the children find it distressing, I’m sure that will be obvious. However children can have a sense of humour.

on the off chance this is not a wind up - my CHRIST you need to get the stick out of your bottom. You would hate the holiday clubs we run (always full with waiting lists a few days after dates launch and with mostly repeat kids). I mean obviously if a child could not cope with the high five game then we’d move on but please!!!! If my child came home complaining I’d a. Explain it is a joke and b. Use the opportunity to teach them to get a grip.

You're bonkers, sorry.

I use buddy as a generic word for all children, including my own. I've never thought of it as horrific. Am not American!

And the down low too slow thing has been around since I was a kid, I can't see that as being disrespectful.

I can assure you when I was growing up after being born in the *checks birth certificate 70s too slow in the context of high five was all over my childhood. We did it to parents, teacher, friends etc..... and they all did it to kids as well.

One of my grandson's has caught me out with the high five thing a few times which he thinks is hilarious! He also calls his little brother 'bud' or 'buddy' so he's obviously fine with both things. I think they are fine, actually.

I was a shy and sensitive child and none of this would have bothered me, unless I was being singled out as 'too slow' compared to everyone else in the group, which isn't usually how the 'low five' joke goes. My uncle used to do a variant: high five! low five! quick five - too slow! and I thought it was hilarious.

'Buddy' is American but it's not remotely offensive and I'm guessing the coaches don't know all the children's names. It wouldn't have bothered me as a child, and for context, I used to object to being called a kid ('I'm not a baby goat!') so I do understand linguistic pedantry. A buddy is a friend. Nothing wrong with that.

@TheRedEngine i work with words for a living and there is nothing wrong with using buddy as a generic term like that. It may be American in origin but so are lots of things (inc the high five). Not a reason to shun them as such.

It’s odd that the coaches see the DC once and never again but maybe this coach is trying to get a bit of a rapport in that short time. Btw if we are debating language, maybe save a term like “horrific” for situations which actually are. Otherwise you are seriously diluting the impact of the word.

So it was around in the 70’s as PP said.

Most people don’t live life by looking everything up and sticking rigidly to ‘guidelines’ they’ve read, there is nuance and context in everyday life.

@TheRedEngine
Are you by any chance ND?
I am, and this sort of behaviour would have irritated me as a child, however as someone who has worked with children for almost 30 years I can assure you that the majority of children would be fine with this sort of interaction.

It true that someone with a lot of experience with children could probably sense which kids were more inclined to different types of engagement, and would be able to target their interaction, but on the whole, this is run of the mill stuff. Especially if the person involved only has the one session with the kids.

You seem very rigid. I’m not sure kids coaching is for you.

April fool?

I genuinely don't think this is the right job for you. There is absolutely nothing horrific about being called buddy.