AIBU to question entering my dyslexic daughter for the Kent 11+?

56 replies

Pigwig22 · 01/04/2026 09:17

My daughter is in year 4 and we are trying to decide whether to go for the Kent 11+. I don’t think we should as I’m concerned she’s unlikely to pass, my husband thinks put her in for the experience and see what happens.

She has dyslexia and I don’t feel she does that well at school, but I guess I have nothing to compare her to.

She has come on massively this year in maths, getting 90-100% in arithmetic tests but only about 50-60% in maths reasoning meaning she’s expected overall in maths. This is an improvement to previous years.

In English her compression scores are very good (80-90%), but grammar is just ok (50-60%) and spelling is where her dyslexia really shows 0-3 out of 20 is standard. She would be expected in reading and WTE in SPAG because of the spelling.

We have done some little bits of non verbal reasoning at home and this is her dyslexic super power! I’ve never really known her her one wrong and she sees it almost instantly.

Verbal reasoning is ok if she reads it and close
to full marks if I read it to her as due to the dyslexia she misreads some words. Could she have a reader for this in the 11+?

I think we’d have to work her hard to achieve a pass with the above (is it even possible with this starting point and lots of tutoring??). She already has a dyslexia tutor for the spelling so I guess we would be dropping that and focusing on the 11+ which feels counterproductive long term in what will actually benefit her.

But my biggest concern is if grammar would really be right for her anyway. She can get a bit sad about bad exam marks (ie the spelling test low scores) and they don’t even matter yet. I also feel if (and to me a big if) she scrapped in then she’d be bottom of the class and it would destroy her confidence.

But my husband says stick her in the test without tutoring and see what happens, it all builds resilience he feels.

I think it worth saying we don’t like any of the comprehensive schools near us so our alternative would be private school (I am also nervous about her passing those tests, our top choice would be Radnor Sevenoaks so I think not super selective?). Because of this my husband also argues go for it as we could save on the fees if she did get in.

So AIBU to think it’s a waste of time and potentially detrimental to put her in for it with the above considerations? Or is it all character building anyway?

OP posts:

User79853257976 · 01/04/2026 10:03

anotherdaytogo · 01/04/2026 09:42

And Kent does not have comprehensive schools - it’s either grammar or a non selective secondary school. Any school saying it has a grammar stream is just giving a label to its top set.

Comprehensive schools are non-selective secondaries.

Heronwatcher · 01/04/2026 09:53

I think the key thing is not whether she would pass the test, it’s whether the school is right for her long term. I decided against it for my eldest on that basis. Main reasons were I wasn’t that impressed with the SENCO, he doesn’t respond to being “pushed into” things (needs to make his own mind up that he wants to be good at something), the days were super long because he’d have a longer bus journey (he wouldn’t get home until 5.30) and I just generally didn’t particularly like the ethos of our local grammar school- very much seemed like it was trying to emulate the private schools and/ or about 30 years behind the times! That said it does get excellent results and I think for the right child it would be good. My eldest is about to start his GCSEs at the local non grammar though and is predicted 7s for most things so I think it was the right those for us. He’s also doing loads of extra curriculars like music, DofE, youth club and seems relatively happy and well balanced.

Have you been to the school(s) she’d go to and spoken to the SENCO? Worked out what would be the alternative? If not I’d definitely do that.

anotherdaytogo · 01/04/2026 09:42

And Kent does not have comprehensive schools - it’s either grammar or a non selective secondary school. Any school saying it has a grammar stream is just giving a label to its top set.

Greenqueen40 · 01/04/2026 09:41

My son is at a super selective grammar, he has a massive amount of work to do and there are very high expectations in terms of ability. Don't put pressure on her which she may not be able to maintain when she actually gets there.

anotherdaytogo · 01/04/2026 09:40

My DD is at a Kent grammar and has dyslexia. She has 25% extra time in exams, uses a laptop and gets a 30min one to one per week with a teacher for general writing help. She cannot spell and has little regard for key Spag conventions. However still managed a 7 in English GCSE. Plenty of others at the school are dyslexic too. Now doing A levels in essay subjects. My point is dyslexia won’t stop your DD being successful if she is otherwise clever enough and in terms of that I mean in the top 20% or 30% of her class now. Dyslexia does not mean she will be at the bottom of the year group. It means you learn differently. Not that you are less intelligent. At our grammar school the students at the bottom of the year group are those who just don’t put the work in regardless of how smart they might actually be. Definitely tutor your DD. Everyone else will be tutoring whatever they may say!

Nodwyddaedafedd · 01/04/2026 09:32

You have described my daughter to a T. We have decided not to. If we heavily tutored she could get in but she's very sensitive and there's little Sen provision at the school for dyslexic kids. I feel that the struggle when she gets there (yr7-9) may well destroy her mental health (they are likely to fly 9-11). But one of the local comps is nicer- even if it doesn't have the best scores. So we are trying to move into that catchment and heavily tutor.
There's no right answer.
I would look at your child and the local schools carefully. And move if you have to.

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