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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to expect confidentiality after raising concerns with a charity?

160 replies

HarvestSky · 01/04/2026 06:57

I was dissatisfied with the teaching methods in a specialist subject at school. I contacted a local charity that specialises in that subject and provides teaching for teachers. I wanted to find out whether what the school was doing was best practice, and how they could improve through training courses. However I must have mentioned the school's name rather than keeping it generic as I wish I had done. Now the charity has fed back to the school through personal contacts that I told them xyz about the school's teaching, and the teachers are annoyed.
Should I have expected a reasonable degree of confidentiality from the charity or am AIBU for dobbing the school in?

OP posts:
Original poster
HarvestSky · 01/04/2026 07:10

I had asked for their advice in how to help show the school there might be a different best practice.
They took my email and said they would pass it to their teaching department to reply to me.

OP posts:
ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/04/2026 07:10

PoppinjayPolly · 01/04/2026 07:08

Breeze in, tell the school… “HALT!!! Everyone stand back!!! We the experts have arrived!!”
Interested op if you are ex RADA and its drama, or a Nobel Physics winner and it’s science teachers you know so much better than?

Show quote history

Edit, I can see you said OP now.
Is that question aimed at me or the OP?

IAxolotlQuestions · 01/04/2026 07:10

So you wanted to raise an issue but disempower anyone from actually dealing with it?

in answer - yes, you were likely unreasonable.

They probably kept your name out of it, but the school can connect the dots.

Also, you cannot unilaterally impose an obligation of confidentiality. They would have to agree.

TheRealMagic · 01/04/2026 07:09

Did the charity feed back that you had said it, or that 'a parent' had? If the former then that's completely inappropriate. If the latter then I don't see how else they could have done anything in the way you wished them to - how could they raise concerns about the teaching without saying why?

PoppinjayPolly · 01/04/2026 07:08

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/04/2026 07:06

What were you expecting them to do if not speak to the school?

Breeze in, tell the school… “HALT!!! Everyone stand back!!! We the experts have arrived!!”
Interested op if you are ex RADA and its drama, or a Nobel Physics winner and it’s science teachers you know so much better than?

plims · 01/04/2026 07:08

Are you a parent of a child at the school?

There are quite a few scenarios in which information cannot be kept confidential. For example, if they was a risk to the wellbeing of children at that school.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/04/2026 07:06

What were you expecting them to do if not speak to the school?

SpiceGirlsNeedAComeBack · 01/04/2026 07:06

Did you speak to the school first? Do you have experience in teaching yourself? It was obvious they would contact the school though in that regard yabu.

Original poster
HarvestSky · 01/04/2026 07:05

Yes, I contacted the school twice, but I felt fobbed off by their replies. I have a lot of knowledge of the area which is why I contacted an organisation I respected as a third party.

OP posts:
PoppinjayPolly · 01/04/2026 06:59

Did you speak to the school first? What’s your background knowledge of the subject yourself since it seems your first action is to contact an external group and tell them the schools rubbish at this and the teachers need additional training?