AIBU to say DP must take responsibility for his elderly dog

Wow! Must be a lot of hot air balloons in your area.

Order food online with a repeat prescription. Book regular dog walker to come every day to walk her at his expense. Ask MIL to help out where necessary and get the useless excuse for a human being clear up any accidents. God help your poor kids if anything happened to you

Poor dog, I feel so sorry for the poor thing 😞

we have an older German Shepard who started to have the occasional accident, a vet trip and a more sensitive diet seemed to be the answer but the real game changer was getting a local dog walker, she comes 3 days a week every single week even if we have a day off we don’t cancel, he’s 13 years old, he’s got arthritis and he’s not doing well but he absolutely loves the dog walker and it’s made our lives so much easier not having to juggle who’s job it is to cover walks. 3 30 minute walks per week costs us £36 and I’m more than happy to pay it, I highly recommend you do the same. It takes a huge load off

Firstly, to minimise the mess, make sure you shut the dog in one room when you do go out.

Also, it does sound like your DP has dumped responsibility on you. He needs to be letting the dog out regularly and clearing up the mess too.

Your boyfriend or girlfriend needs to book dog into a kennel during the day.

Don't be so absolutely absurd. He's forgotten to book the dog walker - he isn't beating it to death.

Nobody sane leaves their partner because they made a mistake.

Sounds like you are going through an awful time all round, OP.

There is no silver bullet solution for this that anyone will be able to suggest, sadly.

From everything you say I don't think your husband is an out and out cunt generally? He has just dropped the ball big-time on the dog front, currently.

Tell him the impact it is having on you, and that it needs to change. He needs to get the dog walker booked for days he can't do it, and the kibble on some kind of repeat order.

I know it's not a magic solution, but if he takes more responsibility for things like this, hopefully that will help a little.

Good luck.

Honestly just LTB what a waste of space

This is animal cruelty. You should both be ashamed. He doesn’t love the dog.

He is a cruel excuse of a man.
And you are standing by and enabling his cruelty.
That poor old dog.

Not your problem. His dog his responsibility. You have to make it clear and be resolute in terms of care of the dog it is you or the dog

Absolutely this!

I’d be making it clear the dog either goes to live with mil or gets put down if he isn’t going to take responsibility for it when he’s there and also when he’s away! Make it VERY clear the dog staying in your house with you looking after it is not going to continue and whether this means he leaves with the dog then you don’t care but you’ve had it up to here with looking after HIS dog!!!

I agree with above, best for the dog to be PTS.
Your waster husband refuses to take responsibility and you are drowning juggling it all.
An incontinent dog around children is not acceptable.
I so admire when women point blank refuse to have animals that they know will be left to their sole care.

My children wanted a dog but with their super busy lives and their inability to be relied on to do regular chores without reminding, there was no way I was listening to promises to the contrary.
I wouldn't entertain it.
They can get a dog as adults in their own home.

I know so many women who were caught out.
Unsurprisingly when the dog eventually passed and their kids mentioned another dog, it was shut down so quickly.
I actually like animals too, but don't need nor want the responsibility of it.

I'd do the kind thing and get the dog PTS. She is being neglected, your house is becoming a literal shit tip and that can't be good for your DC.

That poor poor dog is being neglected. I could never respect anyone who would forget to book a dog walker, forget to get food and leave their dog to pee and poo all over the house and i could never sit and watch it happen. What a terrible shame.

You lost me at perimenopause tbh. It's a life change that every woman goes through, not a disability You are both badly neglecting this dog and it's cruel. I've got a very much loved 12 year old dog and he can barely go more than 2 hours these days without having to empty his bladder. I really wish I hadn't opened this thread.

Exactly this! shame on you!!!

What is the point of such a lazy selfish waster?
Could you manage without him financially?
Think about it.
I couldn't stand that mess in the house.
Time for some hard decisions i think.
What a loser.

If he can’t walk the dog he needs to throw his money at it and have a walker once or twice a day. Poor dog. Anyone would mess locked in a house for hours no access to toileting.
Forgetting to book a walker is horrendous, I’d no more leave my elderly dog uncared for than a child. They are totally reliant on you.

Your DP is a champ amongst men isn’t he! He makes sure the only responsibility he has is work and leaves you and dog struggling. He needs to pay you back for what you have paid out and you need to make sure you get a dog walker to ensure the dog gets walked.

You said he adores the dog more than his children, but he cannot manage even the absolute bare minimum of caring for the dog (toileting, food,walk)?!?! Do your children need removing by social services then, because presumably he seriously neglects them too if they are even lower on his list of things he "cares" about?!

I would leave this awful, lazy, neglectful man. Seriously. He SAYS he loves the dog, but none of it is true. His actions are screaming that he does not care. How are you trusting a word coming from his mouth?

How could you choose THIS fail of a man to listen to, respect, have sex with, and choose to present as the optimal father figure to your precious children? It's about so much more than just the dog being actively, harmfully neglected in your own home (although that poor animal needs putting out of the misery he CHOOSES to inflict on it). What a piece of shit he is.

I'm interested to know if he was the sole carer for the dog before you got together as you said they came as a package. If so did he do better then or has the dog always been neglected?

I'd get rid of it - the partner, I mean. How can you have any respect for someone who fails to meet the very basic care needs of a living thing that is totally reliant on them. Failing that he pays for a daily dog walker, booked in advance and bulk buy food. But honestly, this behaviour would be a deal breaker for me.