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AIBU?

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Are other full-time working families finding there is nothing left?

936 replies

fatface001 · 31/03/2026 08:40

Alarm went off at 5:30 this morning, then an hour stood on a packed train into London for the commute. We are a normal family: one child and two full-time jobs. I’ve always enjoyed working and have always worked hard, and I don’t mind that at all — but I do expect that full-time work should still mean there’s something left at the end of the month for a normal life.

But that really doesn’t feel like the case anymore.

There’s nothing left at the end of the month. Everything has been stripped back, all non-essentials have gone, and even basic things around the house are being put off or done ourselves because there isn’t spare money for trades. It’s just constant cutting back.

What’s hard is that we’re both working really long hours and doing everything we’re “supposed” to do, but it still feels like we’re going backwards rather than getting ahead.

When I hear talk about “those with the broadest shoulders” contributing more, I honestly don’t recognise it anymore in real life. It doesn’t feel like anyone in our position has anything left to give — it feels like the pressure is entirely on ordinary working households just to stand still.

I’m not looking for luxuries — just the sense that working still gives you a bit of breathing room. Right now it doesn’t feel like that at all.

Is anyone else feeling the same?

OP posts:
VeterinaryCareAssistant · 01/04/2026 13:08

angelos02 · 31/03/2026 09:43

£30k a year? Does that include child benefit? Anything else? 'Free' school meals?

🤣🤣🤣🤣
You won't get free school meals on 30k a year! 🤣🤣

For what it's worth I got my P60 which showed i earned £14,800 this financial year. Husband earned similar and we get no UC or extra top ups. Grown up kids though so no childcare or anything.

Kirbert2 · 01/04/2026 13:08

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:47

Being a carer is a choice not an obligation. I believe Scandinavian countries do not apply tax if you are handicapped, but other disabilities do pay tax on benefits.

What other choice do I have, exactly? If I don't care for my disabled child then the state would have to which would certainly cost more than what I currently get in benefits.

angelos02 · 01/04/2026 13:08

hattie43 · 01/04/2026 13:05

That fluffiness is for the fairies . It’s survival of the fittest now in this country . If working people no longer see value in going to work where do we end up then . This Labour government needs outing and someone else coming in needs to make work pay . When people work and can’t even afford a pizza on a Friday evening we’re in trouble . Going to work these days means paying for an over burdened welfare state whilst we have no defence , shitty roads , shitty health service shitty education and nothing works .
The welfare state needs disbanding and the only state help should be for those who are completely disabled . Companies and businesses should not be paying such low wages the state needs to top them up . If they are they need to revisit their business model . I also think there’s a world of difference between someone being so disabled they cannot do anything and today where any affliction means all types of work is ruled out . When I starting working there were 3 disabled people in my office , a blind lady ran the telephone lines and reception , a Learning disabled man worked in the post room and a veteran with one leg became an office manager . I can’t in later years remember working with anyone disabled .

Absolutely - every word of this. There'll be no welfare state at this rate as everyone will just sack off working as it really isn't worth it. The gap between working and doing jack-all is getting so narrow.

Katypp · 01/04/2026 13:07

Kirbert2 · 01/04/2026 12:25

Even if they can't work due to a disability or because they are a carer?

In my world, yes. The threshold should be for everyone. It is very unfair that someone on a low wage is taxed, and someone who gets most types of benefit isn't.
It's the same money and has to buy the same things.
I can think of no justification why someone earning £13,000 is taxed and someone getting the same amount in benefits isn't.
Can you?

hattie43 · 01/04/2026 13:05

glitterpaperchain · 01/04/2026 10:53

They've been shafted by the government so it's ok to spout hatred at poor people?

Why should people be nice? Maybe because in difficult times community is all we can cling onto? Would be good if people came together, supported each other, rather than turned against each other. I don't know how to explain why you should be a nice person

That fluffiness is for the fairies . It’s survival of the fittest now in this country . If working people no longer see value in going to work where do we end up then . This Labour government needs outing and someone else coming in needs to make work pay . When people work and can’t even afford a pizza on a Friday evening we’re in trouble . Going to work these days means paying for an over burdened welfare state whilst we have no defence , shitty roads , shitty health service shitty education and nothing works .
The welfare state needs disbanding and the only state help should be for those who are completely disabled . Companies and businesses should not be paying such low wages the state needs to top them up . If they are they need to revisit their business model . I also think there’s a world of difference between someone being so disabled they cannot do anything and today where any affliction means all types of work is ruled out . When I starting working there were 3 disabled people in my office , a blind lady ran the telephone lines and reception , a Learning disabled man worked in the post room and a veteran with one leg became an office manager . I can’t in later years remember working with anyone disabled .

VeterinaryCareAssistant · 01/04/2026 13:03

Starlight1979 · 31/03/2026 09:37

I don't understand people on six figures spending all their money.

It's not that hard to understand. They have higher out-goings. You aren't going to find many people earning six figures and living in a 2 bed terrace in a working town.

Well if they did they might have more money.

XenoBitch · 01/04/2026 13:01

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:53

By this logic doctors, surgeons, nurses and care home managers should all be tax exempt. What about fire fighters? Ambulance crews? You’ve got to draw the line somewhere.

Those are jobs and are a choice.
Looking after a disabled family member that you live with is not.
I bet my UC that they would rather their disabled family member was not disabled to start wth.

Violese · 01/04/2026 13:00

PerfectPairofBoots · 01/04/2026 12:04

There is a lot of misinformation in this chat
We don't spend 44% of taxes on benefits at all, the 44% is from the total amount spent on welfare, 55 % of that is pensions, see below for figures, a very small percentage is out of work benefits

see chatgpt.com/share/69ccfaa3-e34c-8332-8e04-250d336a123b

Pensions are a benefit. Just like any other benefit. Read the legislation behind it. There is no difference between pensions and any other benefit. Such a common misperception, made because so many pensioners have a thing about claiming benefits.

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:56

Coffeeandbooks88 · 01/04/2026 12:50

So you would stick your child in an institution then instead of paying the parent to be a carer? It isn't a choice! It is what you do as a parent!

No, I’d pay the tax if that’s what it came down to. As would most I suspect. Too many are able to opt out of a tax system others cannot escape.

Quickdraw23 · 01/04/2026 12:54

Haven’t read the full thread but yes I agree.

i would say we are an average income family, with a household income around £75000 pre tax. Two adults, one baby.

Partner works full time compressed to four days, I dropped to 4.5 days and compressed to four days after mat leave. Baby about to start nursery 3 days a week. For me to stay at full time hours with four days of nursery would have meant me paying to go to work and leave my child in nursery the extra day per week. I couldn’t compress full hours to four days and still make nursery pick up.

we live in a totally unexciting small city in the south west in a two bed terraced house. Mortgage is £1000 per month, £600 of which is interest. We only run one car which is very big standard. No holidays. Will maybe go camping once the baby is a bit bigger. One small dog. We don’t have expensive gadgets or jewellery. Theatre maybe once a year. Meal out maybe once per month. Takeaway once per month. No cinema trips. Clothes are majority hand me downs, Vinted or second hand. Hair cuts every 3ish months, no beauty treatments. Batch cooking - mostly vegetarian. Shop at Lidl or Aldi. Very low alcohol consumption.

we do have a loan that we will be paying off for the next two years because we needed IVF and didn’t qualify for NHS help, about £300.

we do manage to save a couple of hundred pounds a month living like this, which gets gobbled up but house repairs/vet expenses on a regular basis.

we are not hard up and I try to take a minute each day to be grateful for what we have - our health, our safety, our beautiful baby. But i would say that job wise in terms of level of seniority and salary we are equivalent to what my parents were earning in the late 90s, and we are living a VASTLY different life.

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:53

JacquesHarlow · 01/04/2026 12:51

Being a carer is a choice not an obligation

Wow. Yeah @80smonster we all know that legally no one has an obligation to be a carer.

What you don't factor in with your pithy little phrase, is how little it takes into account people's feeling of obligation due to lack of choice (finances, lack of support, love etc).

So yeah, you can pull away all the support for carers if you want, based on it "being a choice", but society would fall apart without the role carers play.

By this logic doctors, surgeons, nurses and care home managers should all be tax exempt. What about fire fighters? Ambulance crews? You’ve got to draw the line somewhere.

JacquesHarlow · 01/04/2026 12:51

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:47

Being a carer is a choice not an obligation. I believe Scandinavian countries do not apply tax if you are handicapped, but other disabilities do pay tax on benefits.

Being a carer is a choice not an obligation

Wow. Yeah @80smonster we all know that legally no one has an obligation to be a carer.

What you don't factor in with your pithy little phrase, is how little it takes into account people's feeling of obligation due to lack of choice (finances, lack of support, love etc).

So yeah, you can pull away all the support for carers if you want, based on it "being a choice", but society would fall apart without the role carers play.

Coffeeandbooks88 · 01/04/2026 12:50

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:47

Being a carer is a choice not an obligation. I believe Scandinavian countries do not apply tax if you are handicapped, but other disabilities do pay tax on benefits.

So you would stick your child in an institution then instead of paying the parent to be a carer? It isn't a choice! It is what you do as a parent!

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:47

Kirbert2 · 01/04/2026 12:25

Even if they can't work due to a disability or because they are a carer?

Being a carer is a choice not an obligation. I believe Scandinavian countries do not apply tax if you are handicapped, but other disabilities do pay tax on benefits.

Crikeyalmighty · 01/04/2026 12:47

Winter2020 · 01/04/2026 12:45

I think if a resident parent chooses to claim benefits the income of the non resident parent should be assessed and maintenance should be paid into a state account to repay the tax-payer some of what they are forking out. Then non payment won't affect the resident parent but can be treated like non payment to HMRC is treated.

I also think parents that choise to cksim genefits should have to choose a resident parent and if they don't the courts should. This is so the parents can pay to raise their own child to the best of their abilities before asking anything of the tax payer. Rather than the "have them 50:50" so no-one pays maintenance and the tax payer picks up the tab.

Yep that’s a good idea

eggsandsourdough · 01/04/2026 12:47

glitterpaperchain · 01/04/2026 12:37

If working for a business still leaves you so short of money that you need to top up with benefits then that business is costing us money and we need to recoup it

You have many different circumstances, what a single person earns may be plenty for them to lve but what a married couple with 3 children earns doesnt touch the side for them to live even with a strict budget.
So should companies then look at each individuals family status and their outgoings?

Many many companies pay decent, above the national living wage but its still not enough.

Many families arent getting topped up with benifits because they dont "earn enough" they are topped up due to many different reasons, marriage breakdowns, childcare, or more children than they can afford.

Winter2020 · 01/04/2026 12:45

Crikeyalmighty · 31/03/2026 23:03

@Katypp. Yep - and I know like myself you are social minded but not an idiot - it’s one reason I disagree with maintenance not being used as part of the calculation - maybe disregard for 6 months but if it proves to be consistent and reliable and it can be pretty large in some cases- it should go into the income pot for calculations - if it stops then it can be reassessed - I think a lot of people think it’s the odd £200 or so if you are lucky- this isn’t always the case-

I think if a resident parent chooses to claim benefits the income of the non resident parent should be assessed and maintenance should be paid into a state account to repay the tax-payer some of what they are forking out. Then non payment won't affect the resident parent but can be treated like non payment to HMRC is treated.

I also think parents that choise to cksim genefits should have to choose a resident parent and if they don't the courts should. This is so the parents can pay to raise their own child to the best of their abilities before asking anything of the tax payer. Rather than the "have them 50:50" so no-one pays maintenance and the tax payer picks up the tab.

Crikeyalmighty · 01/04/2026 12:42

@eggsandsourdough yep but you are only paying that level of personal tax if paying both a highish sakary AND dividends on top - many do not - and pay next to no NI as many pay minimum of £12570 as salary -.and pay majority as dividend of which up to 50k are at 8% and no NI - and often then get their corp tax right down by sticking big sums into pension -. I myself am on that position so as stated I know the score - so a lot pleading poverty doesn’t wash with many - a great many are paying very little tax or NI .

Coffeeandbooks88 · 01/04/2026 12:39

january1244 · 01/04/2026 09:29

@OneShyQuail it’s not an outdated figure, it’s last years figure!

And with subsidised childcare why can’t people work more? There was a PP on this thread saying she ‘gets away’ with working one day a week because with her partner working also they are just over the AET threshold to claim without being hassled. How is that fair when two full time working parents are having more and more tax taken to pay for this.

I have no family nearby and look after a child who is likely autistic and has never done more than a morning at nursery. I work weekends and school holidays though if you think I am lazy.

glitterpaperchain · 01/04/2026 12:37

eggsandsourdough · 01/04/2026 12:32

But why should they pay more tax? Because they are more sucsessful, because they have worked harder? Wheres the benefit then and why would any corporation or potential corporation start their roots here.

I think approx 48% tax on their earnings and then 25% corporation tax on profits is plenty.

If working for a business still leaves you so short of money that you need to top up with benefits then that business is costing us money and we need to recoup it

youalright · 01/04/2026 12:33

TracyLords · 01/04/2026 12:26

does it include any benefits though? UC? PIP? Child benefit?

Yes but thats within the 30k yearly income, I'm not just counting mine and dp wages

eggsandsourdough · 01/04/2026 12:32

glitterpaperchain · 01/04/2026 11:48

I don't think all business owners are 'lavishing it up'. I own a business. I think taxation on business needs to completely change too, so huge corporations pay more but small local business should be treated differently

But why should they pay more tax? Because they are more sucsessful, because they have worked harder? Wheres the benefit then and why would any corporation or potential corporation start their roots here.

I think approx 48% tax on their earnings and then 25% corporation tax on profits is plenty.

XenoBitch · 01/04/2026 12:31

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:29

Personally, I don’t think someone working hard for a low income should pay any more tax. They are already contributing via their work. Those who claim and take expensive services should really pay in some form. Otherwise you are essentially decentivising anyone in a low income job. Why not sit on your arse and let others pay eh?

Why should someone that gets even less in benefits have to pay tax? You don't make any sense.
So someone who earns less then £12k - pays no tax.
Someone on benefits but also on less than £12k - pays tax.

That makes no sense.

80smonster · 01/04/2026 12:29

XenoBitch · 01/04/2026 12:24

So then people earning less than £12k should be taxed too. That will go down well 🙄

Personally, I don’t think someone working hard for a low income should pay any more tax. They are already contributing via their work. Those who claim and take expensive services should really pay in some form. Otherwise you are essentially decentivising anyone in a low income job. Why not sit on your arse and let others pay eh?

TracyLords · 01/04/2026 12:26

youalright · 31/03/2026 09:46

That's everything yes and no free school meals as kids to old and to young. Our mortgage is £600 a month, no childcare costs, no debt, no credit cards, 10 year old car,

does it include any benefits though? UC? PIP? Child benefit?