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AIBU?

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Can they get an adhd assessment wrong?

58 replies

ncaibu · 30/03/2026 22:39

I had an assessment for adhd recently, they concluded that I don't have adhd and that my symptoms/traits are a combination of past trauma and stress. I accepted this, but I keep wondering if there's the possibility they got it wrong. I'm not sure I depicted my reality thoroughly. I've been through a long term emotionally abusive relationship recently and didn't tell them that I was still caught up in it, the results of which meant I wasn't myself. One example is that it made me feel very depressed and completely dulled my spontaneity, impulsivity and obsessive urges. I based all my answers to their questions on how I felt at the time, which is not how I am usually. I was just very consumed by the effect the relationship had on me. Is it possible the outcome of the assessment was wrong? It's really playing on my mind.

Also, I believe part of their decision was due to factors from my childhood. They didn't have much info to go on, no school reports etc, but implied that I wouldn't have been able to read a book if I had ADHD (I was a big reader as a child), and that I wouldn't have been able to complete 2 big school projects I mentioned that I enjoyed.
Is this correct?

OP posts:
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KitTea3 · 01/04/2026 21:41

Ultimately part of the criteria for a diagnosis is the fact that symptoms were present in childhood.

I do understand that unfortunately, for many adults ,that can be tricky and hard to evidence. Did the provider assessing you not ask for someone from childhood to confirm/corroborate your experience? Anyone I've known to get a diagnosis has had evidence, be it from parents or school reports etc. whilst I don't personally have unschool reports there were more than enough examples from childhood given that supported the diagnosis.

blossom2026 · 01/04/2026 21:36

ncaibu · 01/04/2026 21:19

Sorry, just to clarify, the pre-assessment isn't a questionnaire, it's carried out by an adhd nurse (may have the term wrong there) after they receive the questionnaire. I think that's why the other poster referred to it as part A and part B, as it was an hour spent with someone who assesses you first and if they think you have enough symptoms you move on to the main assessment.

I actually didn't know about the adhd UK website, I will check it out as, regardless of a diagnosis, it should help me. Thank you x

Ah ok, that sounds like there is a difference in wording, perhaps between different providers. I went through right to choose (just in time before they started pulling it back!) after being on the NHS list for about 18 months. The steps were:

  • GP appointment where I had already chosen my preferred provider from the ADHD UK RTC list. I was very fortunate in that my GP sat and did the online referral there and then.
  • I had already completed the pre-assessment questionnaires for the NHS pathway but was required to complete them again for this provider, along with BP reading and having an ECG.
  • It's possible that as I was already on the NHS assessment pathway, they accepted me for what they call the Assessment A and B (or 1 and 2) - but as I said, that may be what that provider refers to it as. The two appointments were held with separate clinicians, as I think I said in my original reply to you. They were both 60-90 minute diagnostic interviews which went through lots of things including personal history and the effects on life as a child and now.
  • At the end of the second appointment (Assessment B for me!) we discussed diagnosis and options, including titration.
  • I opted for medication and the titration took about 4-6 weeks from there, in a separate appointment. Each time they produced a report, which was send to my GP surgery to be added to my records.

I've only typed that out in case it's of help to others - I know you've decided not to seek out a second opinion!

The ADHDUK website is absolutely fab IMO, there is so much useful info and advice on there. Hopefully it will help you get some more answers and alternative support x

ncaibu · 01/04/2026 21:19

blossom2026 · 01/04/2026 21:12

You're absolutely right and I apologise for not realising you meant the pre-assessment, which would be completed by you based on your answers to the diagnostic questionnaires. My understanding is that the questionnaires would then be considered by a multi-disciplinary team, who would assess whether you meet the criteria. Apologies for taking from what you wrote that you meant the actual assessment process.

It's understandable for it to play on your mind - and the reading thing, as others have said, is a very narrow view and shouldn't be used as a terms of reference for diagnosis! I was a massive bookworm as a child - I don't read much these days but that is out of choice, not because it's impossible!

Have you checked out the ADHDUK website? There are great resources there including support sessions, online sessions about different topics, etc - you don't need a diagnosis to access support from there and you might get some more informed answers x

Sorry, just to clarify, the pre-assessment isn't a questionnaire, it's carried out by an adhd nurse (may have the term wrong there) after they receive the questionnaire. I think that's why the other poster referred to it as part A and part B, as it was an hour spent with someone who assesses you first and if they think you have enough symptoms you move on to the main assessment.

I actually didn't know about the adhd UK website, I will check it out as, regardless of a diagnosis, it should help me. Thank you x

OP posts:
blossom2026 · 01/04/2026 21:12

ncaibu · 01/04/2026 07:52

There is a pre-assessment before they pass you on for the assessment, which i did have.

It's just that I relate so much to everything adhd, and while I do accept that symptoms can overlap, there's just some things I'm not sure about like the reading thing that's been highlighted. I won't be seeking a second opinion, I'll just carry on now, just plays on my mind sometimes.

Edited

You're absolutely right and I apologise for not realising you meant the pre-assessment, which would be completed by you based on your answers to the diagnostic questionnaires. My understanding is that the questionnaires would then be considered by a multi-disciplinary team, who would assess whether you meet the criteria. Apologies for taking from what you wrote that you meant the actual assessment process.

It's understandable for it to play on your mind - and the reading thing, as others have said, is a very narrow view and shouldn't be used as a terms of reference for diagnosis! I was a massive bookworm as a child - I don't read much these days but that is out of choice, not because it's impossible!

Have you checked out the ADHDUK website? There are great resources there including support sessions, online sessions about different topics, etc - you don't need a diagnosis to access support from there and you might get some more informed answers x

blossom2026 · 01/04/2026 21:05

BeenThereDoneThatGotTshirtSelection · 01/04/2026 07:47

'As for the assessments, have you had the Assessment A and B? '

I'm confused - there is no assessment A or B for ADHD?

OP, if you're not that pressured to have a diagnosis, I'm not sure why you seek more opinions? Ultimately, diagnostic criteria are not clearcut and lots of other things can look like ADHD, but it sounds like the service looked at all your experiences before deciding?

Oh sorry, no it's not as I've been through the process of an ADHD diagnosis myself, my mistake 🙄- what is the point in posts like this?

youalright · 01/04/2026 08:25

Absolutely drs get it wrong all the time this is how some people end up with about 5 or 6 different diagnoses because everytime they go to see someone they get told something completely different

BeenThereDoneThatGotTshirtSelection · 01/04/2026 08:21

Others will disagree - but ADHD is a spectrum and you can have traits without having 'full' diagnosis.

A friend was assessed for autism before and was told she does not have it, with a similar reason for it given as yours. She disagreed at the time and she has traits - but she now says she agrees it was the right decision for her.

MuchTooTired · 01/04/2026 08:03

I’ve recently been diagnosed with ADHD. One of my favourite things to do is to read - my entire life I’ve buried my nose in a book because it quietens my brain, I hyper focus on it until I’m finished, and I can read quickly. I just really happen to enjoy it!

Ironically I started looking at ADHD about 6.5 years ago because my DD was so extra in her behaviour and realised I ticked every single box.

I’ve spent my entire life wondering why I couldn’t be ‘normal’ like everyone else. I pursued a diagnosis because holding on to life got too much and I wanted confirmation that it’s not just because I’m shit at it. I’m now medicated and life is easier now.

I think my DS was misdiagnosed as not having it because he can mask significantly better although he has a lot of markers, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he is when he’s older. DD is still not even in the process of being diagnosed, she masks at school and therefore nobody will refer her.

ncaibu · 01/04/2026 07:52

BeenThereDoneThatGotTshirtSelection · 01/04/2026 07:47

'As for the assessments, have you had the Assessment A and B? '

I'm confused - there is no assessment A or B for ADHD?

OP, if you're not that pressured to have a diagnosis, I'm not sure why you seek more opinions? Ultimately, diagnostic criteria are not clearcut and lots of other things can look like ADHD, but it sounds like the service looked at all your experiences before deciding?

There is a pre-assessment before they pass you on for the assessment, which i did have.

It's just that I relate so much to everything adhd, and while I do accept that symptoms can overlap, there's just some things I'm not sure about like the reading thing that's been highlighted. I won't be seeking a second opinion, I'll just carry on now, just plays on my mind sometimes.

OP posts:
BeenThereDoneThatGotTshirtSelection · 01/04/2026 07:47

'As for the assessments, have you had the Assessment A and B? '

I'm confused - there is no assessment A or B for ADHD?

OP, if you're not that pressured to have a diagnosis, I'm not sure why you seek more opinions? Ultimately, diagnostic criteria are not clearcut and lots of other things can look like ADHD, but it sounds like the service looked at all your experiences before deciding?

SixtySomething · 31/03/2026 14:46

ncaibu · 31/03/2026 12:54

This is it though, I didn't want to just 'say the right things' to ensure a diagnosis. I wanted it to be right, and I overthought each question too much and tbh it confused me trying to work out 'how I feel' in such and such moment. I didn't make any notes beforehand, which I probably should have done, and some answers I gave I knew weren't right as I answered out of embarrassment, such as questions to do with driving. E.g. when I have music on, I don't watch my speed very well etc, but I didn't want her to think I was a reckless driver because overall, I'm not. I was in court not too long ago over reckless driving on the motorway and I'm so ashamed of it, so I try very carefully now not to speed etc.

I know exactly what you mean and what you’re looking for.
You do need to pay privately I think, though can’t be sure. I believe the cost is around £1500.
A family member had a diagnosis in London within the last couple of years. As I recall, this guy came at ADHD from neuro psychiatry and was involved long before it became fashionable.
Someone like that would give you full attention and share their expertise.
If you’re interested, I could find out his details and pm you?

Nosdoc · 31/03/2026 12:55

Hello,
can i ask how you managed to get your assessment? What process did you go through? Thaks

DragonsFurry · 31/03/2026 12:55

If you had a ADHD if you would already know and be fairly certain of that. What are your indicators for
ADHD?

ncaibu · 31/03/2026 12:54

SixtySomething · 31/03/2026 12:44

I think to get a successful diagnosis you need to be clued up which buttons to push, what to say and what not say.
I know someone who does ADHD diagnoses and she does 4 a day, including writing them up.
It’s not like she’s listening that hard, just looking out for key things.
A good source of income for someone I don’t think particularly perceptive/ intelligent / educated. She jumped on the bandwagon early.

This is it though, I didn't want to just 'say the right things' to ensure a diagnosis. I wanted it to be right, and I overthought each question too much and tbh it confused me trying to work out 'how I feel' in such and such moment. I didn't make any notes beforehand, which I probably should have done, and some answers I gave I knew weren't right as I answered out of embarrassment, such as questions to do with driving. E.g. when I have music on, I don't watch my speed very well etc, but I didn't want her to think I was a reckless driver because overall, I'm not. I was in court not too long ago over reckless driving on the motorway and I'm so ashamed of it, so I try very carefully now not to speed etc.

OP posts:
SixtySomething · 31/03/2026 12:44

ncaibu · 31/03/2026 10:04

Yes, one of the things I did keep saying is "I've got better at that over the last few years". I said I've become much more aware that other people don't do the things I do, so yes, I've effectively "trained" myself, or mask. But that didn't seem to be taken on board.

I wouldn't like medication anyway, I would prefer to learn strategies on how to manage things better, but as I've not been given any diagnosis, I'm left to figure it out on my own now and nothing has changed.

I think to get a successful diagnosis you need to be clued up which buttons to push, what to say and what not say.
I know someone who does ADHD diagnoses and she does 4 a day, including writing them up.
It’s not like she’s listening that hard, just looking out for key things.
A good source of income for someone I don’t think particularly perceptive/ intelligent / educated. She jumped on the bandwagon early.

SixtySomething · 31/03/2026 12:37

DaveGroh · 31/03/2026 07:26

This is a really judgemental take.

It isn’t a judgmental take. It’s a reasonable opinion , which is different from your opinion. I hold it and many, many other people do.
ADHD diagnosis is an exploding industry which many people are profiting from, some quite unreasonably.

Nosejobnelly · 31/03/2026 10:21

From what I understand you won’t get diagnosed unless traits were present in childhood. My adult DD is going about to start the process and I am sure I’ll be expected to give an account of her childhood issues.

xanthomelana · 31/03/2026 10:15

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult and read for hours, I always had a reading level that was a few years above my age so that’s not true.

Like you I didn’t have much to go on from my childhood, I don’t speak to my mother so getting information was difficult. I was under a child psychologist as a teenager which might have helped with my diagnosis.

Women are notoriously overlooked when diagnosing ADHD and autism because we mask it better and adapt to fit into our surroundings. I believe that they definitely could have gotten it wrong, there’s no medical tests such as bloods or X-rays for it so it’s not difficult for people to get misdiagnosed either way.

ncaibu · 31/03/2026 10:10

WaryHiker · 31/03/2026 01:25

" I based all my answers to their questions on how I felt at the time, which is not how I am usually. "

Why on earth did you do that? How could they diagnose you without important and relevant information?

I'm not really sure, I think being in the middle of something which was already really altering my perception and state of mind, it was hard to see past any of that at the time. If you've ever been in a relationship like that, you'll understand how much is confuses you and, as another poster mentioned, leaves you with brain fog.

I also wasn't necessarily looking for a diagnosis, so I didn't want to mislead and be given one if it wasn't right. So I intentionally answered based on what I was like at the time. Since coming out of the relationship and getting back to my nornal self and being able to see how much it affected me, I regret this now as I'm not sure I did give an accurate representation of what I'm like.

OP posts:
ncaibu · 31/03/2026 10:04

nodogz · 31/03/2026 01:44

Perhaps it’s how they ask the questions. For example, if the question is how often do you interrupt people, you might have TRAINED yourself to never interrupt but you’d like to! And you should answer on the urge not the action (I know, why don’t they say that!)

I hardly ever lose anything but I have extensive systems backing up non-existent short term memory.

it’s not the end of the world to not get a diagnosis, plenty of non-drug strategies are very effective on their own

Yes, one of the things I did keep saying is "I've got better at that over the last few years". I said I've become much more aware that other people don't do the things I do, so yes, I've effectively "trained" myself, or mask. But that didn't seem to be taken on board.

I wouldn't like medication anyway, I would prefer to learn strategies on how to manage things better, but as I've not been given any diagnosis, I'm left to figure it out on my own now and nothing has changed.

OP posts:
ncaibu · 31/03/2026 09:16

Thanks for all the replies, I've just caught up on them all.

With regards to childhood trauma - I have a good childhood overall. I'm not sure I suffered from trauma in my younger years. My parents separated when I was a year old, argued a lot during that first year of my life and she said I could have suffered trauma from that, but I'm not convinced of that tbh. The only thing I could think that may of caused any childhood trauma was my older sister, she's 10 years older than me and was really mean to me and occasionally violent. When I was 14, I went through a traumatic experience, which I know has affected me through life, although I was already experiencing issues by this point. Other than my sisters behaviour towards me, any traumatic issues I encountered were past secondary school age.

The reason I'd like to know isn't for the label, as I said previously, it would be better if I didn't have it, for obvious reasons. I was happy with the outcome initially, it just plays on my mind a bit as every single thing I see/hear about adhd is me. And I'm just a bit of a weird/awkward person, there's other nuances, not just the big, obvious symptoms, which just fit me.

With regards to the reading, yes, it's like I become hyper focused with it. If I can't get into something, I can't follow it. But when I get into a book, I won't put it down until it's finished.

Some stuff just seemed so disregarded, like the fact that I've started about 10-15 courses in my life that I've been unable to finish, all wildly different from each other. They've all involved meltdowns infront of college teachers, late assignments, and stress until the point I quit. I managed to finish 2 of them, one was due to my tutor allowing me to finish at home with a lesser qualification, and one where my assignments were all done last minute in the 24 hours before they were due, I'd become so hyper focused that I actually felt like wired, my brain felt like it was operating on a different level. I get a similar feeling when I get really obsessed about something, an idea that I NEED to do now, and I talk about it non stop and feel a buzz as it's all I can think about for a while.

OP posts:
Weeelokthen · 31/03/2026 09:15

Talkingtomyhouseplants · 31/03/2026 08:31

Adverse childhood experiences and trauma literally rewire the brain!

They absolutely do, sadly.

summitfever · 31/03/2026 08:40

@Mintchocsi can get immersed in a book for hours/days however long it takes to finish it but if it doesn’t hook me in the first chapter, I’m done. Reading literature for learning I have to scan and copy down the important parts so it sinks in, that’s strategic as I find non fiction too boring to get immersed in. And why I managed to study to masters level but I often forget it as soon as the exam is done!

summitfever · 31/03/2026 08:36

I feel exactly the same as you. I’m adhd’d out my nut due to ongoing issues with my ex who I separated from 4 years ago (he counterparents). As I child I remember being a bit impulsive, had doom piles, felt panicky having to sit too long, but could concentrate etc. I think I probably had traits that have been turbo powered by trauma and burnout. I wish I knew how to go back to how I was. The brain fog and lack of motivation now is debilitating

Talkingtomyhouseplants · 31/03/2026 08:33

Jupiterx · 31/03/2026 02:01

Most just want a lable nowdays.
And if they dont get one they keep pushing until they do.

The question I always come back to at work is : what would a label give you that you do not already have?

Sometimes for adhd people want to access medication but more generally it is to give a reason to the difficulties they are experiencing. However it sounds as though the op already knows why they are having difficulties - they have experienced trauma.