Was my request reasonable or was he right to storm off?

So touch bacon wash hands
touch crabbing line wash hands
retrieve crabbing line and crab wash hands
put crab back wash hands
put crabbing stuff in car wash hands
fuck me the tide will off gone out before you’ve even caught any crabs

or the completely common sense approach don’t touch your mouth or food and wash your hands at the end

Can't believe people have said you are unreasonable OP, you were not unreasonable. Raw bacon on hands is disgusting, basic hygiene is important especially round young children.

It isn't. Pork contains ringworms and tapeworms. Bacon has to be cooked off. Parma Ham isn't truly raw - it's dried out to the point that the organisms and bacteria cannot survive. Bacon is not treated in the same manner and still needs to be cooked.

Uh oh, turns out hand sanitizer and wipes aren't as good as soap and water either - very timely article that just came out yesterday, for those interested.. https://www.eurekalert.org/news-releases/1122055

Wtf, no it isn’t!!

Everybody understands cross contamination.

But bearing in mind DH's hands will be getting contaminated repeatedly throughout the activity, going to the pub to wash them each time seems ridiculous.

And please don’t tell me to ‘educate myself’ - you sound like the OP.

But he is touching raw meat/nets/crabs/raw meat again etc. so how often should he have done it? Is estuary water clean or could that cause an issue too.

And given that they hadn’t brought anything to wash with, would you expect him to take the piss by going into the pub without buying anything every couple of minutes?

if you don’t agree with someone’s hygiene standards then you don’t have to deal with them. But don’t tell grown adults what to do because it makes you look ridiculous.

Just educate yourself on cross contamination. For example, if I touch raw meat and then touch my child's doll because she's dropped it and then passed my daughter her drinks bottle, I'm going to have to clean all of those things once I've cleaned my hands. If I just wash my hands after touching meat....... Saves me hassle. Common sense

She doesn’t need to say it in the first place. The act of asking an adult (particularly ‘gently’ which is a word used to describe a parent talking to a child) to wash their hands is in itself infantilising them.

She didn’t have to have used a nasty tone. In fact it’s more infantilising that she did it the way she says.

He is a grown man who was doing a dirty task. Perhaps he thought he would wash his hands when he had finished crabbing. The only hand washing option seemed to be the pub anyway and you can’t just go in and use their facilities every two minutes.

She doesn’t have to like it but saying these incidents have been regular recently does make you wonder whether she has got in the habit of speaking to him like that

But why are we assuming she talked to him like a child? According to her she asked him gently to do so so she would feel more comfortable. How else are we supposed to ask for things? True, she could absolutely be lying/deluded and she actually had a nasty/bossy tone, but we don't know that. We only have her words to go on.

Clearly if they are going crabbing they have chosen seawater and crabs as an acceptable risk, which dependent on where they were might or might not be perfectly clean, and there's no need to add raw meat on top of that...but that seems to be a matter of opinion 🤷‍♀️

Talking to someone like they are a child and telling them to do something they don’t want do isn’t compromising and deciding together as mature parents, It’s patronising them

as said he was handling seawater and crabs so no need to go and wash hands until they had finished

like my username says we ca agree to disagree ✋

You're talking out of your backside.

Mum was also there to stop those five minutes from being a fun free zone? And yes he's an adult, but when you're parents you decide what's in the best interests of your children together, so yes mum gets a say. If they disagree on hygiene that's fine, but they both need to work out a compromise together, not squabble in front of the child.

Does your husband not mind being treated like a child reminded? Each to their own and all that but the first time my partner ‘reminded’ me to do something like that would be the last time.

It’s not the sea - so that wasn’t an option. The OP who appears to be a bit precious about hygiene didn’t bother taking wipes, instead she spoke to her husband like he was a toddler and expected him to wash his hands in the pub (obvs without buying anything).

They are outside and will be getting other filthy stuff on their hands. The bacon is only one element - he is going to be handling nets, crabs and shitty water.

Perhaps you could clarify how often he needs to wash his hands during a dirty activity - so far none of you who think he should have washed his hands regularly seem to be able to answer how often?

You're quite rude really. And you haven't answered my question,yet quoted me in it to answer, besides you don't wait until the end anyway, you clean as you go to stop cross contamination.... But whatever

That was my first thought. Great minds think alike!

You're crabbing not cooking - YABU. If it was my DH he would have stuck his hands in the water and then dried them on his jeans..... and then laughed at me as I would call him a yokel.

They were messing around in the sea - hands can be washed after you’ve finished - no point in washing half way through

This!

Yes didn’t you know children love crabbing - it’s fun!! 🤩

he clearly doesn’t feel as you do and that’s understandable - he’s an adult and ca decide the risk of not washing his hands for himself

He is an adult. He does not need his wife to tell him what to do.

to me the husband huffed off not because of this but because this isn’t the first or last time something like this has happened.