AIBU to try to help my wife lose weight? Somehow.

Could you pay for her to have weight loss injections as so few people meet the NHS criteria? It can be a game changer and takes the angst out of it. It can be prescribed privately by a doctor, with progress and safety monitored.

Seems to me the long term win is getting out of the habit of buying the calories in the first place

Fucking hell. I think you might be onto something here. I wonder why nobody else ever thought of that?

YANBU and clearly only want to help

Excellent way for @HelpMeHelpMyWife wife to lose a massive chunk of useless weight. Him.

She’s a grown woman, so sit down and stop trying to bully her into conforming to the way in which you believe she should look. Getting your child involved is pretty terrible parenting.

There were a lot less obese and overweight people- partly due to UPFs

Mention a fake woman at work a few times. That should do it.

Here and still there😞

I’m in same position. What my husband could do to help is to take over a load of the kids activity stuff that I’m constantly keeping track of and playing chauffeur for so I have a bit more time/energy. A lot of my overeating stems from stress and exhaustion (menopause not helping!)

You kind of have to be a bit self centred on a successful diet (not in a bad way but I just mean you can’t constantly be considering what everyone else wants & need to just focus on you) & I’m finding it incredibly hard to be that at this life stage as everyone including my husband has almost constant demands on my time and energy. I realise it’s my responsibility to say no but if your wife feels the same then not making those demands yourself and picking up some of them from other family members would help.

Everyone's solution to bring overweight is WLI.

Have they all forgotten that WLI only work on a calorie controlled diet? @ACynicalDad @Sogrownup3 @Gurrul @worcesterpear and whoever else thinks that a woman going to WW won't know about WLI.

You say she goes to WeightWatchers - have you talked to her about that, just ask her if she thinks it's any good. It doesn't sound like it's working for her, this could open up a discussion about other options. She has to find something she can stick to in the long term.

Urgh.
What a pompous thing to write.

Anyway. Offer to pay for Mounjaro for her.
The end.

I hear that they are remaking the noughties TV show Fat Families, perhaps if you are both a bit rotund, you should apply to go on the show? Maybe Steve would be able to help her, some of the terminology such as "jelly bellied Jumbos" might make her reconsider her current predicament as a larger lady.

Offer to pay for mounjaro. Life changing.

YANBU to want her to be healthier, but it's not easy (in the end not possible) to MAKE this happen for another person.

I'm early 50s and my husband and I have both lost significant amounts recently with a low carb approach. I started it and just refused to cook separate meals for him (I do all the cooking anyway). I also told him he was unhealthily overweight and should lay off the carby snacks and puddings (I did stock up on low carb alternatives, tasty ones so that we wouldn't feel deprived. Because this is for the long term.)

But this has required buy-in from him as well as effort from me. And I would say that telling a husband he needs to lose weight for his health is normally a very different thing from telling a wife she needs to lose weight.

Might weight loss jabs be an option? Is there a way to have a low-stakes conversation about weight loss jabs in general?

Comfort eating not comfortable bloody auto correct

What is your lifestyle like OP, and your wife? Not diet and exercise but things like, relative free time for you both, caring responsibilities, work, general stress? All of this can contribute into how much mental space someone has to plan exercise and healthy eating, and the motivation to do it.

She obviously already knows she is overweight if she is going to Weightwatchers and you have discussed with her. If this thread is genuine: take over the food shopping and cooking; go on walks/do other sports together; pay for her to have weight loss injections.

Well said @MacchiatoMavis !

Fat people tend to know they are fat. Some goon pointing it out is 99% of the time massively unhelpful and probably makes the person reach for the biscuits.

There are now more ways than ever to lose weight and if she needs help then there's no shame in that.

I see the ever-so-smug fat-bashers are out already. You people should shut up until you have been in the shoes of someone with a weight problem. Until then you have nothing to add except the sound of your own horribly ignorant voices.

Having been absolutely in the very overweight category and a 50+ year old woman, I can assure you that she will be very well aware of her own weight/health/restrictions. Having other people point it out is not helpful, any changes need to come from herself. If you are loving and supportive you should keep out of it.

I value my health and I’d feel the same but you can’t force another adult todo anything. Have you discussed WLI?

There will be a myriad of reasons if she's comfortable eating.iE being harangued by op possibly.

Agree!