“You are lucky to get £7”

No I don’t think you would be. Most single parents would like a break (feel supported) I’m sure. So yes, others may not be supported financially but they are supported with childcare. You are not supported from either! So yes, it’s fine to say they are the lucky ones!

I totally get it. Same as you I get £7 a week via cms

we split as he is an alcoholic - his how much he drank

he refused to pay anything. Stopped working. Drank even more - now due to his drinking he has no pancreas so gets lwcra and uc and rent paid and doesn’t have to even look for work

he won’t work as means will have to give me 12%

his £30 a month pays for nothing but I did it as one less bottle of vodka for him to drink

yes I would love some time alone but dd won’t ever be staying at his alone as I don’t trust him not to drink and dd didn’t want to be left alone since he was drunk and called me a fucking cunt in front of her

sorry for rant

yes they should be made to pay for ther kids

and made to look for work. Work and get uc not a problem

ex has no intention to ever work again

I used to get £5 a week for ds, it really annoyed me because the if exh was earning the amount of money he received in benefits I would have got £42 a week. I used to buy myself a bottle of wine with it as a way of giving him the middle finger. Ex mil thought it was terrible that exh had to pay to support his son, when he got the letter from the CSA telling him he had to pay & I got a phone call that was just her yelling & screaming down the phone, this was the woman who had been telling 6 year old ds to tell CAFFCASS that he wanted to live full time with his dad & not see me any more.

Sometimes you need to let peoples unwanted opinions go in one ear and out the other. That's easier said than done though sometimes.

£1.57 is what they worked out I would get 15 years ago because he managed to hide and lie about bank accounts..he still has the same full-time job...I tore up the letter, rang and cancelled claim and brought up son alone. No contact has ever been made, ex sent abusive cards etc in the child's first year until he got ordered by a no contact order. We've moved several times had a happy successful life and re-married my oldest has several siblings and a wonderful step dad and done it all on our own. No thankyou to the measley money from a guy who so wanted a child but a month before birth changed his mind

My dad is a knob - sorry to be so blunt - but he is. He didn't even try and convince anyone of anything - he just didn't turn up for an access visit one day and went on his merry way - and if it were up to him my mum would have got nothing.

He also remarried and had other kids that he supported and acknowledged - but that was his choice.

My mum got two pounds a week in the 70s till I was 16. And he had to be forced to pay it. No contact from when I was around three. My brothers dad paid nothing - he emigrated. My dad wasn't rich but he had a lot more money than my mum did - she struggled even though she worked full time.

Im sorry this person upset you

I would also keep it. Shove it in a savings account

I think, in a way, the £7 makes him look worse than if he gave nothing. You hear of these men who don't pay anything at all and they've all got a story, or an excuse or something. (Always nonsense but they convince some people). In the future, when your kids are adults, that £7 per week will be like a clear sign that even though you did everything right, that was the absolute most he ever did.

I don't know if I've explained that correctly but I feel like that paltry £7 will stand as a testament to what a shitty, shitty father he is, no matter what crap he might try to pull in the future.

I wouldn't cancel the money but I wouldn't save it for anything nice as it could spoil a good day out. I think I would start a subscription for something essential with it and then just not think about it, something like loo roll.

Depends on the tone/meaning - the ‘lucky’ might be exasperation at how many men don’t pay rather than literally suggesting £7 a week is lucky.

The system is shocking. I think there should be a set minimum amount per child and if you can’t pay it due to income it accrues as a debt that you have to pay later even if that’s from an estate to the child when you die.

I don't think this person actually meant you're lucky. More like something said in jest comparing that they don't even get anything at all. I wouldn't have taken it in an offensive way.

The amount is rubbish but what would you gain for stopping it completely?

I'd send people who are fit enough to work, but don't and don't provide childcare etc, into forced work. They are absolute wronguns.
My DD gets the £7 and I co-parent. He's a waste of oxygen, mind you, he doesn't deserve my grandchildren. They are wonderful.

I'd keep taking it and I'd start a "Magic of £7 💫" photo album to take weekly pictures of how I've spent it each week.

I don't know what I'd do with it, but I think it would both give me an ironic laugh hut also boost my confidence that I'm really fine without him and just how pathetically useless he is.

Like imagine looking at a photo of the 2 pack of polo shirts and comparing them to the jumper, shoes and PE kit you've bought them. Or the one welly he has bought out of all the pairs of shoes. Or the one plate of food he has put on the table all week. Or half of one haircut for one child.

Don’t cancel it, I would put it in an account and just let it sit there then split whatever is in there between your children when they are 18, it might pay for a few driving lessons or something by then.
It is an absolute joke, but he owes you so much more that I absolutely wouldn’t cancel the paltry amount he has to pay.
Does he not see them at all?

No one is “lucky” to get small or average amounts of child maintenance. It’s literally the bare minimum the government deem acceptable dependent on income.

I only think a single parent is “lucky” if their ex is a very high earner so they get a huge amount of maintenance, for example 4 figures a month, enough to have a nice lifestyle.

FWIW I get nothing at all but exh does have them EOW and some of the holidays. I don’t think I’m “lucky” because he has that time. No one thinks he is lucky that I do the majority of the parenting and pay for everything, oh no. That’s considered my job.

Bloody hell. My son is 38 now. ExH only gave me £15 pw when he was small, and I thought I was being shafted!

That amount is ridiculous.

I don’t think anyone genuinely thinks you are lucky.

CMS is still payable even if the non resident parent has them every other weekend, and so I’m not sure why the comment about not getting any CMS because of that was made