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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

It’s another ND one

84 replies

Knittingunwittingly · 27/03/2026 09:30

I’m sure I am going to get flamed for this, but here goes…

I attend a local craft group with 8 other regulars. Seven out of 8 of them have either been diagnosed ND (mostly ADHD) themselves or some/all of their DC have, or both. I also strongly suspect that I am ND, and possible one of my DC is too.

I know I am arguing against myself here because I suspect myself of being neurodivergent, but if ND is becoming more common than NT, then surely NT is no longer NT? Or, is it that us ND birds of a feather flock together, as it were?

YABU it just so happens that you have landed amongst a ND bunch, and this is not reflective of society at large.
YANBU we are pathologising normal human experience and potentially over diagnosing neurodivergence.

OP posts:
RudolphTheReindeer · 27/03/2026 10:04

Knittingunwittingly · 27/03/2026 09:44

Thanks for your perspective. Yes, the criteria are so wide. And some things, like not being motivated to do things you don’t like doing, seem to apply to the majority of the population!

Edited
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Not being motivated to do things you don't like doing isn't a criteria for an ND diagnosis though is it. Statements like this are really unhelpful because now those who want to latch on to another reason why we're all 'over diagnosed' will be 'well I saw on mumsnet people who aren't motivated to do things they don't like are all getting diagnosed as autistic' when they're not and never have been.

Original poster
Knittingunwittingly · 27/03/2026 10:03

anonymous0810 · 27/03/2026 10:02

You are in a craft hobby group. Of course it is full of ND people 🤣

😆

OP posts:
anonymous0810 · 27/03/2026 10:02

You are in a craft hobby group. Of course it is full of ND people 🤣

Locutus2000 · 27/03/2026 10:00

'I’m sure I am going to get flamed for this, but here goes…'

Said by no-one in good faith, ever.

Locutus2000 · 27/03/2026 09:58

What an original concept for a thread.

Legomania · 27/03/2026 09:57

You are experiencing selection bias; it is well-documented that certain hobbies and indeed jobs attract ND people (see: the stereotypes about train spotting and people who work in IT)

Original poster
Knittingunwittingly · 27/03/2026 09:44

JeepersItsTheKraken · 27/03/2026 09:39

Diagnosed autistic here. I absolutely doubt my diagnosis, or think it is simply a natural variety of human, and seeing how badly affected autistic people with high needs are now that the criteria is so diluted I am considering a second opinion (will go private as I don't want to take up NHS resources)

Yes I fit the criteria, but if so many of us do then then criteria must be too wide to be useful. Just make workplaces nice for everyone, and suddenly 50% of people don't need a diagnosis.

Thanks for your perspective. Yes, the criteria are so wide. And some things, like not being motivated to do things you don’t like doing, seem to apply to the majority of the population!

OP posts:
JeepersItsTheKraken · 27/03/2026 09:39

Diagnosed autistic here. I absolutely doubt my diagnosis, or think it is simply a natural variety of human, and seeing how badly affected autistic people with high needs are now that the criteria is so diluted I am considering a second opinion (will go private as I don't want to take up NHS resources)

Yes I fit the criteria, but if so many of us do then then criteria must be too wide to be useful. Just make workplaces nice for everyone, and suddenly 50% of people don't need a diagnosis.

BuffaloCauliflower · 27/03/2026 09:37

No, there aren’t now more people with neurodevelopmental disorders than there were before, though diagnostic criteria and understanding of the meaning of some of these conditions is expanding, to capture more people. So you may meet the current criteria to diagnose but wouldn’t have 25 years ok. My clear ADHD as a teenager was diagnosed bipolar because there was no reference for ADHD and teenage girls hormones.

Yes, neurodivergent people do often cluster together. Because why wouldn’t you want to hang out with people who you’re more likely to vibe with? For us ADHDers that’s often because our communication style involves jumping around topics/going on tangents, starting stories in the middle, or bonding by sharing our similar experience (which is often interpreted it as ‘making it all about us’ by people who don’t share that communication style)