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Original poster

DH leaving toddlers alone in the bath

116 replies

Hundredsplendedsums · 24/03/2026 19:01

DC are nearly 4 and 2. DH usually does their bathtime as we have another baby.

The last few nights I’ve noticed him put them in the bath then come downstairs, yesterday it was to look for his iPad and today it was to vacuum the floor! I got really annoyed and said I would not leave them alone, he said I was overreacting and that I ‘do it all the time’ (I definitely do not and would not leave them unattended in the bath).

IANBU am I?!

OP posts:
milkhopper · 24/03/2026 19:42

My niece left her two little girls (1 and 3) in the bath while she did some chores around the house. She has now only got one little girl.

Please tell your husband from me that he’s a FUCKING IDIOT!

DaisyChain505 · 24/03/2026 19:40

Your husbands an idiot.

Mumstheword1983 · 24/03/2026 19:39

This is an absolute no. My DD slipped under the water while in the bath at around 2.5 when I was right there. I will never forget the fright on her face as she tried unsuccessful to get right back up and started choking. Thankfully I was a second away getting shampoo from the under sink cupboard. It was horrible. I still think about what would have happened had I been out of the room briefly.

Cheepcheepcheep · 24/03/2026 19:38

jnh26 · 24/03/2026 19:33

Wow, you couldn’t just have empathy for the death of his sister without pointing out you wouldn’t dream of voting Conservative?!

😳

Show quote history

Actually feel dreadful for that now. Sorry. Too late to edit.

Cheepcheepcheep · 24/03/2026 19:37

jnh26 · 24/03/2026 19:33

Wow, you couldn’t just have empathy for the death of his sister without pointing out you wouldn’t dream of voting Conservative?!

😳

Show quote history

Sorry, was posting at speed - you’re right, of course. Just used to how this website can be. Entirely unnecessary.

cadburyegg · 24/03/2026 19:35

Fucking hell. My dc just turned 11 and 8. It’s only been in the last year or so that I have felt comfortable leaving 8yo in the bath if I have forgotten something downstairs. Even then I wouldn’t be downstairs long. YANBU at all

jnh26 · 24/03/2026 19:33

Cheepcheepcheep · 24/03/2026 19:31

Mine are 4 next month and 5.5 and I’m just at the point where I’ll put clothes away on the same floor with all doors open. A 2 year old is madness.

By no means am I a Tory but I’ve always felt haunted about what happened to Jeremy Hunt’s sister.

Wow, you couldn’t just have empathy for the death of his sister without pointing out you wouldn’t dream of voting Conservative?!

😳

Bristolandlazy · 24/03/2026 19:33

Time him. Then ask him how long he things it takes to drown.
He's being negligent.

Calendulaaria · 24/03/2026 19:33

I'm horrified by that and also the fact that he says you're overreacting. He has no idea!

xOlive · 24/03/2026 19:31

Absolutely baffles the shit out of me how parents leave children in the bath for any amount of time with all of the information we all now know about drownings.
What a shit Dad.
You’re going to have to do baths from now on.

Cheepcheepcheep · 24/03/2026 19:31

Mine are 4 next month and 5.5 and I’m just at the point where I’ll put clothes away on the same floor with all doors open. A 2 year old is madness.

By no means am I a Tory but I’ve always felt haunted about what happened to Jeremy Hunt’s sister.

Shedmistress · 24/03/2026 19:30

This is absolutely fucking mental. Is he like, a bit thick?

mathanxiety · 24/03/2026 19:30

TowerRavenSeven · 24/03/2026 19:23

I’d be wondering how else he’s neglecting them in his care if he thinks this is ok!
I’d be alarmed frankly.

Yes indeed.

This is a man who thinks he can leave the donkey work of family life to his wife.

jnh26 · 24/03/2026 19:28

IdaGlossop · 24/03/2026 19:04

It's pretty basic that you don't let under fives out of your sight when they're in the bath. Nipping into the next room to fetch pyjamas, fine. It's the work of seconds. Chores on a different floor, definitely not.

Typo

Edited

Not even that, I’m afraid. Children have drowned in seconds, while a parent “just went to get a towel.”

You must never leave the bathroom while they are in the bath.

scoobysnaxx · 24/03/2026 19:27

Sho him this thread so we can tell him what an ABSOLUTELY IRRESPONSIBLE PRICK he is

mathanxiety · 24/03/2026 19:26

Hhhwgroadk · 24/03/2026 19:21

Very dangerous behaviour. Never let him bath them again. Under 6 years they could die in seconds!

That's exactly the result he is hoping for here.

He gets off the nightly bath, putting work on his wife who has a baby on her hands too.

No! He does it right or nobody gets a bath, and he sleeps on the couch until he admits he was wrong and takes his responsibility seriously

canuckup · 24/03/2026 19:25

Yanbu

100%
If he doesn't realise why, he shouldn't be bathing them

Madness

PotatoHeading · 24/03/2026 19:25

What an idiot. I'd never leave them with him for bathing again. I don't know why he can't understand the risk he is putting them at?Either one could slip. It's not fair to leave that responsibility on them.

Zanatdy · 24/03/2026 19:24

Vacuum the floor? I’d be fuming. Coming for an ipad not too bad as seconds, but hoovering and not even able to hear the kids. No. I’d just do it myself as I would not trust him.

TowerRavenSeven · 24/03/2026 19:23

I’d be wondering how else he’s neglecting them in his care if he thinks this is ok!
I’d be alarmed frankly.

mathanxiety · 24/03/2026 19:23

Diddums clearly thinks the chore of bathing his children is beneath him.

Go absolutely ballistic, and if you can get any reliable relatives of his to back you up, get them to peel rashers off him too.

Do not back down! You are 1000% right here and he couldn't be more in the wrong.

Hhhwgroadk · 24/03/2026 19:21

Very dangerous behaviour. Never let him bath them again. Under 6 years they could die in seconds!

verabarbleen · 24/03/2026 19:21

Yanbu at all I have 3 the oldest are 4 and 6 (youngest is a few months ) but I sit with mine while they bath . Oldest is nearly
7 and I occasionally go into my bedroom when he’s in the bath to to fold clothes but I talk to him or listen out . I was sitting in there last year with four year old and I was watching something on my phone and she slipped under! I felt awful! I wouldn’t leave them at that age

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 24/03/2026 19:20

Drowning is silent, and fast. He's being hugely negligent and frankly I'd never leave him to supervise bathtime again. He sounds the sort to continue to leave them through some perverse need to prove he's right.

I'm afraid my immediate thought was that if, god forbid, something happened to your younger child then your older child would carry that with them for life.

TakemedowntoPotatoCity · 24/03/2026 19:19

Your replies aren't filling me with confidence OP. Your children simply cannot be left alone at this age. Your husband has to be on the same page otherwise you know you will have to do bathtime.

If he won't change whats the point of him?