Husband’s female colleague’s issue being taken very seriously.

Outside of working hours and thus paid hours employees should be free to choose what they would like to do. She sounds dry, miserable and won’t have made
any positive working relationships here

And I e never worked anywhere where extra marital affairs are a thing. Maybe 20 years ago but it is seen as totally unethical in the post me too days. It would be a minimum of a written warning if you were caught where I work. But then I can’t imagine who would want to. These are work colleagues. It isn’t a night club.

Next email.

All staff must spend dinner and at least 1 hour at the bar together.

Next email.

All staff will share bunks.

😂😂

I used to do this sometimes but not for a couple of decades to be honest.

I’ve done my own work trips more recently and they had scheduled evening activities - eg conferences or similar. Spouses would not have been welcome.

ExH worked in financial services (still does) and I think it’s a lot less acceptable now.

Well she's not exactly ensuring that any colleagues want to sit with her in future is she? I hope you can still all meet up, albeit not on official work trips.

Most men are misogynists - but it takes a woman to perfect it ..

in my experience.

Yet, equally, some on here seem to have a problem with workers wanting to spend their evenings and nights with their spouses/partners, suggesting that these S/Ps are somehow jealous and controlling, (Stepford Wives FFS?) which to me seems just as ridiculous. As usual, women putting other women down. Thus it ever was.

I personally think that it is completely unprofessional. I've only ever done this if i was away for work on my own without other colleagues.

This! So the company are now saying that “like it or not you’ll socialise”??
unless I got paid 24/7 for the whole trip, that’s a no!
are the going to enforce the topic of conversation as well?

Again - if these work trips are not special work events where socializing is expected after the end of the work day, how is it different going up to your room to spend the rest of your day with your spouse/family and going home to your own house and doing the same thing.

You do your 9-5 and then the rest of the day is yours to do what you want.

Some people have clearly only been on work trip where networking or evening events / planning is required.

For those who are simply working away from the home base on a regular basis there is absolutely no need to involved colleagues in your evenings.

But then they are attending as a carer, not a +1.

I'd be with you on the potential challenges of working in a team of older men - if she hadn't complained specifically about the wives. If her grounds for complaint were as retold to OP, then she is 'playing corporate totty'. If it was more about lacking opportunity to socialise with the team, she should have said she was disappointed the men didn't want a group evening instead of moaning that the wives were there.

So she either sees herself as a temptation being warded off by jealous wives, or she's extremely bad at making a reasonable point with clarity. She doesn't get my vote.

Why was it inappropriate? Genuinely, seems like they just go to spend the evening with their spouses and their colleagues spouses, it’s out of work time, they cover their own tabs etc…. I’ve met up with friends if they are in my city for work, even hung out in their hotel room & ordered room service (covered my own tab)

Am I missing something? As a few people have said it’s inappropriate

Some of these comments about the woman on here is exactly why she will not want to share her free time with her colleagues wives. She calls out an archaic practice and people are questioning her mental health and moral compass. Yes, let's ostracise maneater! FGS.

She’s a young woman being ignored by older male colleagues

She wasn't being ignored: she was invited to join.

She just wasn't the centre of attention.🙄

Maybe you haven’t been around anyone who doesn’t drink on religious grounds. Maybe they don’t like being round other people who have had 3/4 drinks.

Which is completely different from people going along “just because”

DH’s coworker is a problem child. She’s created negative feelings all around and will “pay” for that in subtle ways (e.g. lack of support) until she ultimately leaves because she doesn’t “fit into the culture.” Do your best to let it go so it doesn’t affect DH’s career. It was a nice perk while it lasted but now that’s over.

Did they take away the second person's pillows, bath towel and free tea bags? How did that work, presumably the guest was charged as if there were two people in the room

Some colleagues may need a family member with them due to disability or health needs. My male colleague used to travel to conferences his wife attended due to her disability.

This is a really weird take. As a young professional woman she shouldn't be relying on her 'older male colleagues' to keep her company. And one of them also asked her out to dinner!

Are you sure you have the full story? It just doesn’t sound plausible. It seems more likely she’s complained about feeling excluded at lunch or maybe even in meetings, and the bro clique at the office gossiped up the part about her wanting their wives out the picture.

It’s not just wives, lots of women bring husbands.
Eg one conference is at a luxury golf resort. It costs same for company whether it’s a room booked for 1 or 2 there are only double bed rooms. He has to drive there and gets mileage no different if just him or both of us in car.
In evening there’s a gala dinner one night - plus 1 ticket is available to buy I don’t usually bother.
Other evenings up to them what they do. Some may go to bar. Some prefer to go to spa for a beauty treatment. Some may have work to do and head to room.

Absurd take lol

There was a point in the past when DH was allocated a budget which probably would have enabled us to accompany him on work trips, had we got cheap flights and stayed in cheapie Ibis type hotels. It never happened, because before we got the opportunity, they changed it to him paying for everything himself at first, keeping records and getting the costs refunded later. It's by the by (is that how you spell that?) now anyway, as work trips away are a thing of the past. They've gone the way of having your spouse/partner accompany you to Christmas etc. meals out - that was stopped ages ago due to budget cuts.