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Original poster

DH deleting messages

54 replies

soupbucket · 21/03/2026 22:15

I don’t know if AIBU here or not, me and DH been out the pub for tea and a few drinks and then come back home, had a nice evening so far and his friend had been messaging while we were out asking if we fancied a visitor for a drink, got home and seen my DH messaging friend and noticed he had deleted all the messages, he was then messaging his ex wife and noticed the same also so couldn’t help asking why he had deleted all the messages. His response was because I’m a snoop so he has to.

Now just for clarity, I have never been through his phone, I have always trusted him 100% no reason not to. I might read his messages if they are in my eyeline when he is on his phone but this has never been an issue. Yeste

This comment is an issue for me, it makes me think he has something to hide, I don’t snoop at all but even if I did what is he hiding? He is welcome to go through my phone all he wants, I literally have nothing to hide.

AIBU to be offended by this or am I being crank?

OP posts:
Farewelltothatid · 21/03/2026 23:05

Well he has virtually admitted to you that if you saw the messages you wouldn't like them. So yes he obviously has got something to hide.

And by accusing you of being " a snoop" he is putting the blame on you for his actions .

If deleting his messages is a change in his behaviour then that is a real cause for concern. Have there been any other changes in his behaviour?

Aquarius91 · 21/03/2026 22:55

Very weird behaviour on his part, I would be suspicious

Original poster
soupbucket · 21/03/2026 22:40

I have never had any desire to even look at his phone. I really don’t know where this has come from.

OP posts:
FunMustard · 21/03/2026 22:19

Even if he doesn't have something to hide, he doesn't trust you enough to not look in his phone, and thinks it's important enough that you can't see everything. I mean, all phones come with a locking process, but despite that he decided to delete everything.