Couple brags

Why on earth are you so bothered what other people (who you do not know) do or say - who gives a shit.

A) no I actually wouldn't have got through my thing without my partner, I'd go as far as to say they saved my life on more than one occasion.
B) I don't care what other people think.

B/ nobody actually gives a fuck.
It’s not about you.
It’s about showing gratitude for someone important to them.
Get over it.

You are being unreasonable. If you start with accounting for any remote possibility of someone being offended or feeling insecure then 99% of conversations can't happen.

But then i feel calling someone you dated for a month "my ride or die", "my man", etc is quite ott and performative.

I’ve never heard anyone say that in real life. Their spouse is their rock, I think if cringe myself inside out for them.

I do think a lot of women on here ar3 very reliant on their husbands. How many times on a what yoy earn thread does someone bizzarely pop up and say my husband earns x. How many times do we see irrational jealousy where the poster appear to think their husband can have any woman he chooses, perving on a young woman, well clearly she wants to shag him, how many put up with bad behaviour, not pulling their weight at home. Too much time at the pub, and still declare they are fab,

id be willing to bet good money some posting about their rocks are in poor relationships by most people’s standards.

Gosh, I would absolutely describe husband this way. When I was single, I had a wider support network and was closer with more friends. So the rock was more spread out. Little pebbles, as it were.

My DH was the rock on which I foundered! A long and very miserable relationship. Does that make you feel any happier!

a) no, my partner helped me through the worst time of my life, as I did with his.

b) I didn’t have a partner then, and nor did he. We’d both been widowed.

I’m not sure I know how others would feel, or felt, and quite honestly, at that time, I didn’t care. 🤷‍♀️

Judging by mumsnet though I think many of the men could be more aptly described as millstones with dusgusting personal habits rather than rocks. I do know what OP means about losing her mum - my mum was always there for so many years and I still feel a gap in my life now she and dad are gone. My husband though has been supportive during dark and difficult times.

That's a really sad perspective.

A: Some of us actually went through life-altering diagnoses and know exactly who kept us upright. If you didn’t have that, just say that instead of pretending support doesn’t matter.

B: And I don't give a fuck about how that makes single people feel?!?

I’ve also never heard anyone say this in real life, or even say they feel proud of being in a relationship. I guess it shows how we are all different. I feel proud of my child, I feel proud of my career. I am also proud of my home, although I onky say the first out loud. I don’t feel proud as I’ve maintained a long marriage, pride isn’t something I attribute to it.

Happy yes I will say I am happily married or love my husband, but I think I’d be bemused if someone said they were proud to be in a relationship.

Happy for you. Truly. But I can’t imagine a situation where someone feels the need to say this in normal conversation.
But people are obviously very different.

Aw Op, I just read that you’ve recently lost your mum.

So sorry. You are allowed to be miserable. Losing my mum really felt like the world had shifted - I was so off balance.

And much as I love my DH, that was a pain he couldn’t really change.

So sending you a hug. It will take time for you to feel ok again. Look after yourself.💐

Iam very proud to be in my relationship, and yes, there are a few things I would have struggled to get through without him by my side, after coming from a very long relationship where I was basically a very well financed single mum, I will tell everyone how lovely my man is and I’m the same age as you 😊

I dont think anyone should be worried about how something like that makes people feel. But I do find it a big ick when people say they couldn't survive without their partner.

I could survive without my DH, but I choose not to because he makes me happy and my life better.

When people act like they literally couldn't live it just feels pathetic to me.
I've got a disabled child and people often say to me 'i couldn't do what you do' and I think well there wasn't a bloody job interview, you don't have a choice you just crack on with it.

Whereas you sound delightful

Oh, I’m long term single and it’s never occurred to me to be upset by those two things. It’s just something people say to express their appreciation of their partner…which I think is nice.

the things I do have a little whinge to myself about are couples in the same situation as me (same size house/area/number of kids) being smug about “managing” better with things like housework/finances/garden. I always think “but there’s two of you so half the work that I do”

and it irritates me a little bit.

I avoid smug people now though and my life ticks along just fine 😝

Suggest you learn what misogynistic actually means.
what it doesn’t mean is calling out women for being bitter and jealous about other people’s relationships. You sound like a bitter old trout too

wow 😮

This is pretty rude too.

who on earth are you to lecture people about who has supported them or not? Very misogynistic to call women expressing their opinions deluded.

my husband has been a great support to me, sorry if that ruins your preferred narrative 🙄

This is the most misogynistic comment I’ve seen today yet, congratulations. It keeps us 40+ women in tow doesn’t it? “If she says anything remotely negative about a man, let’s call her a cat lady or a spinster or an old trout. If she’s under 30 though let’s call her a slag”. Job done, your ‘hubby’ will be most proud 🤮

It doesn’t bother me but when I hear a woman say it about a man I just think she must be deluded. I don’t know any men that have ever made a difficult situation easier 😂 other way around I just assume it’s the truth. In fact, I’ve never heard it said the other way around, it’s almost like men need alllllll the praise and recognition without giving it back 🧐

It also doesn’t take into account that the OH being the ‘rock’, ,doesn’t really have much option???!

In my case, he had all the options. He chose to do what he did. He didn't have to and I certainly didn't expect him to.

I was in an absolutely dire situation 28 years ago. I absolutely wouldn't have got through it without the support of the man who went on to become my (now ex) husband.

I'm certainly not in love with him but I can still appreciate what he did for me at the time. I needed it and there was literally no one else who cared enough to try.

How do you think it makes people who don’t have a partner feel.

🙄🙄🙄