Male colleague keeps barging me and making comments about my appearance

Every family has squabbles - I just wish, everyone, from royals down, stopped plastering it all on various types of media. 🙄

@grumpyatwork does your manager know you've taken over a lot of his work? If not this needs reporting asap and so does his behaviour. Do not make yourself vulnerable by covering for his sad arse.

He is being really childish and he needs to learn that you can't behave like that in a professional environment.

I understand your hesitation OP. Unfortunately it’s a well known fact that when someone raises an issue at work, it doesn’t result in unquestioning sympathy and support.

It’s likely that he would deny it and say OP was imagining it. OP would then be asked if she was sure the barging and shoving wasn’t accidental. It would be her word against his. The whole thing would involve managers in time and effort, and both OP and her colleague would be seen as being equally difficult.

Personally I’d be inclined to call him out each time he does it, and if it carries on next week, then report it.

He needs to be sacked immediately.

Report him asap. He is assaulting you. He is thoroughly bad news. Get him reported now!

If can understand you don't want a reputation as a troublemaker but tell your manager from a place of concern. TBH it doesn't sound like he's in a good place. Maybe you should be concerned for his mental health. He can't do his work, he's lashing out, making horrible comments and hiding in the toilet. Something's wrong and it needs to be addressed.

You are allowing him to get away with it! go to your manager ASAP.

Yoy think someone making comments about someones weight and appearance is "petty"? 😳🙄

Surely it would be a reputation of not putting up with offensive and criminal behaviour from male colleagues, he is the trouble maker not you.
If people were telling you to hit him back that would be stooping to his level.

YABU to think you could be even the tiniest bit unreasonable to report this

If one of your work colleagues came to you and told you this was all happening to her, what would you advise her to do?
He’s acting like an immature little brat!
Write down every last vile remark he makes, if he barges into you again then like other posters have said - exclaim loudly that it hurt.
I hope the tosser gets a rough ride of army life if he thinks he can get away with arrogance like this there. I can’t see him being able to sit in the toilet for ages on his phone there!!

Speak to your line manager and pass the problem on to them. I’d be really bothered if I thought my team couldn’t talk to me about this sort of thing.

Raise it NOW. In writing. Be clear. Exact times and exactly what happened.

This.

Can you confront him yourself, op?
I'm not one to go to HR/managers etc, I'd rather just tell it straight. I find that normally stops things straight away.
But I realise not everyone can do that.

Are you happy with the reputation of being a push-over?
Your colleagues and managers are probably watching your reactions with interest. They've already asked you to do his job as well as yours. I bet they didn't offer to pay you his salary.

I say this wth kindness.
You are not the trouble maker.
He is.
And you should seriously doubt anyone at work who says differently.

I think you need to consider why you are so worried about speaking up about behaviour that every poster on this thread is appalled by. Why do you think you will cause problems? Is it the set up at work? Your family experience? Because to me it looks like you've had to put up with a lot and need a bit of support in standing up for yourself and learning that its OK to do that.

If your managers continue to tolerate this and don't crack down on it. They are very poor managers and you should def start looking for another job in a better working environment. A lot of employers would be shocked by this behaviour too.

Do that one more time and I'm calling the police.

You're being ridiculous. You're not going to 'get the reputation of being a troublemaker' by pointing out that you're being physically bullied by a male co-worker.

You need to be less passive about this. This man needs dealing with.

But you're not making trouble - he is! You've got something that's quite rare on Mumsnet - a universal response! Doesn't that tell you something?! Clearly he's been getting away with this shit his entire life and it's your employer's job to keep you safe while you're at work.

Your choices are report him, call him out to his face, or don't do anything and let the little shit bully you. Surely to god you are not going to allow him to carry on like that.

I've voted YABU - because you are doing nothing about it.

You must report him. Who cares if he's leaving in a few months. You shouldn't be subject to this.
I hope you won't mind me saying that you would really benefit from taking some kind of assertion course or read up on techniques because it comes across as if people have made you feel that you shouldn't complain about shit treatment and should just put up with it, as if you aren't worth anyone putting a stop to it. You need to get angry about this. You are worth being treated with respect and no one has the right to behave otherwise towards you.

Start reading up on your rights at work on website like acas too.

The verbal abuse - and it is abuse is bad enough but barging you is horrific and he will do it again if he gets away with it.
Don't go soft and worry about the consequences to him. He should worry about the consequences.

It's also awful that your managers think its ok to get you to do his work and yet don't seem to tackle him about it. That's unacceptable. Is he the chairman's son or something?

You said you were worried about seeming petty, its this boys actions that are petty and offensive, it sounds like you think they won't believe you.

Make a note of the comments. ..however stupid they may seem, they were meant with agression. And the barging. Try to put the dates down too and keep a diary from now on. If you have a list of his work that you ended up doing include that to. Have everything written down and go to HR.

He's leaving anyway.. but that just means he isn't permanent staff anyway. He can leave early can't he, but you can't put up with this for another six months.