DP says I'd look younger with hair and make-up, AIBU?

You seem to think that’s because you are operating at a higher level than other posters. I don’t think that’s the case. It’s something else.

As for the rest of your post, I have NO idea what you are on about.

Clearly.

Plenty of female animals put on a display
which is why I said "most"
As for the rest of your post, I have NO idea what you are on about.

Do men really? Or is it just what they get?

There's no valid comparison between a fat man and a barefaced healthy woman, by the by.

Not goady. My point was not to feel as if you HAVE to wear makeup etc. As many many women do.
Not that you shouldn't be ALLOWED to wear it if you want to.

Not strictly true. Plenty of female animals put on a display.

I don't really agree with the "you're a feminist if you believe in equality". It's a bit patronising to me. Like saying all proud Americans are Trump supporters because who wouldn't want to "make America great".

Or a better example might be saying that anyone who cares about men's issues is an MRA. The textbook definition and the actual observed behaviour are often miles apart - obv that's a generalisation because feminists aren't a homogeneous bunch.

In fact, I'm not even sure a GC feminist would agree that a libfem in favour of Self ID espouses equality. But equality in itself isn't the same as feminism IMO because feminism only focuses on women's rights (with the presupposition that women are oppressed). Some people don't believe in the patriarchy, so for them 'equality' also involves men's issues.

oh PS in nature generally most of the "displayers" are male

Really odd that you make an equivalence between not wearing makeup and obesity. Also obesity and relationships, but that’s a whole other thread.
As I said. I make an effort. My effort just doesn’t includes make up. And I do t think it’s true most men prefer make up.

Ok. Anyone who is in favour of gender equality is a feminist. Pretending you aren’t doesn’t make you Cooler (quite the opposite).
Id like t9 th8nk that a) we were a bit more evolved than birds etc and b) tha5’ a king an effort)p’ didn’t just mean makeup. I make an effort. I am clean, groomed, in clean clothes which I think suit me. None of ‘sexual displays’ means makeup is essential.
Can’t follow your arguments about relationships, sorry.

Fact is, the vast majority of men prefer a woman wearing makeup. The vast majority of women prefer a man who's well groomed and not obese.

It's just feminists trying to force their minority views on women once again - most women don't actually identify as feminists nowadays despite supporting 'equality'.

Even in the animal kingdom you can observe sex specific mating displays. Some animals do things like build elaborate structures and decorate them with flowers to attract a mate. If it wasn't the literal definition of 'natural' behavior we might say it was a contrived and unnecessary rigmarole.

I actually like to make an effort for my partner. Not because I need to. It's just that I like fit men and wouldn't fancy him as much if he didn't make the effort or if he let himself go. Physical attraction isn't the only aspect in a relationship but it's an important one.

Most men understand that being successful is going to be a massive benefit as most women don't like deadbeats. It seems to be a primarily female concept that a partner should "love me for who I am" whilst making no effort whatsoever. I wonder if it's down to the dynamic whereby it's much easier for women to find a partner (there will always be a bloke out there and it doesn't matter if you're shy because men usually take the initiative).

If he loved you for the person you were when he met you, but you then put on four stone and became a miserable battleaxe....well, you're not really the same person anymore are you? Yes, we all age and physical beauty fades, but a relationship is still a two way thing. Women are quick to moan when they perceive their partner to have become a slob.

I think he was clumsily paying you a compliment?

I always liked doing hair and make up and even when I had a young baby who didn’t sleep much a 5 minute routine made me look and feel much better. You don’t have to do it. But why wouldn’t anyone want to look their best? I don’t really get it.

This is all nonsense. Can’t even work out your point.
Mine is simple: women don’t need to wear makeup anymore than men do. They can be perfectly groomed, professional and (if that’s what they want) attractive without it. As men can. What is your problem with this viewpoint, exactly?

Whether you like it or not we live in a society where aesthetics are real and ever changing. I don't care what you say, very few women are going to like a man in tights with a powdered wig and rouged face. Actually, maybe you would because men wearing makeup might be a sign of 'equality'. 🤣

Women love to moan but the truth is that nobody is calling a portly bloke 'a real man' like we see with 'real' women. Hell, most of the black guys I work with seem to love a straight up fatty but the reverse is not true and they all go to the gym to stay in shape for their chubby girlfriends.

If a woman is well dressed, attractive, and well made up she can get away with being more than a bit porky. Lots of guys like this. However, nobody seems to like a curvy man. And tbh it's always been women driving the Kate Moss aesthetic. I've seen it discussed loads of times before and so many women say stuff like "I know my partner would probs prefer a Scarlett Johansson but I'd still rather be a Kate Moss tbh".

Women are the ones that police female beauty standards the most. Don't blame it on men. They never cared about size zero etc.

And if I don’t care if I look younger? I mean, why should one?

And for all the talk of 'societal expectations', the ideal male body is much harder to obtain than the ideal female body.

Most female celebrities regarded as beautiful are just attractive and slim. Most male hearthrobs have a six pack and muscular physique - Channing Tatum, Jason Momoa, etc. Those who don't lift weights don't understand how hard it is to obtain significant muscle mass whilst remaining at a low bodyfat percentage. It's contrary to how the human body functions. That's why a lot of celebrities do short steroid cycles to bulk up for roles.

Under the care of an expert it's not particularly risky for short periods. They'll check your hemocrit, E2, FSH, LDL, blood pressure, etc. However, for the average guy it's a minefield. My partner is on testosterone injections for a genuine condition and his doc says that a lot of the guys he sees are men who destroyed their endocrine systems by taking steroids in their youth. They're now on a lifelong hormonal rollercoaster. Some have severe gynomastia (man boobs) and serious depression as a result of low test/high e2. Usually they need surgery to sort it out as the manboobs aren't just from carrying excess weight.

The BBC did a documentary on muscle dysmorphia in men (colloquially known as 'bigorexia') and concluded that one in ten male gymgoers have it. The issue is that a gym obsession is usually viewed as a fitness/health obsession rather than being akin to an eating disorder so it goes under the radar. But the mechanism is similar. They have a warped self image where they see themselves as small and 'weak' and they end up taking loads of steroids etc for which the damage is less apparent but nonetheless real.

Some of these guys have been diagnosed with heart conditions and told they'll die if they don't stop, and have just chosen to continue as they'd rather die than feel pathetic. There was a guy in his 20s fairly recently who had the same situation. Think it may have been a congenital heart defect, but either way he just carried on until his heart failed and he died.

Nobody is forcing you to wear makeup. Feel free to wear a cloth sack and grow your armpit hair till you can braid it with your pubes
There we go again @MaIeficent. Equating no make up with weirdness/not looking tidy.
Re men’s facial hair - Ypur post’s most important phrase is ‘used to’. We’ve moved on.

Im not saying you have to but from my own experience I look slightly younger when my roots are done and colour is fresh.
Face wise im not a fan of make up unless I am going out but I do look both younger and healthier with bronzer, lip balm, mascara and eyebrows done (takes me 3 minutes) as otherwise I look deathly and grey.

Wow, you're really trying aren't you. 🤣

Men have something called facial hair. If they don't shave it every day it grows long really quickly in a way ours doesn't. So a clean face for a man is the opposite of a clean face for a woman - it's an unnatural state and one that no caveman would've been sporting.

Nobody is forcing you to wear makeup. Feel free to wear a cloth sack and grow your armpit hair till you can braid it with your pubes. It won't change the fact that both sexes are subject to beauty standards. It's just another of many areas that women love to moan about but men just accept.

It used to be common for companies to have 'no stubble' rules in their dress code, meaning that if men wanted to have a beard they'd have to book time off and grow it past the scruffy stage (or do it over xmas). But more importantly it also meant that declining to shave daily meant you could face disciplinary action which I've never seen to be the case with makeup. Even now it'd be frowned upon to turn up to an interview or an important client meeting looking unshaven.

no! because that never happens on MN

Better? Fresher?
Do you mean younger?
We don’t all aspire to that - and in my opinion make up doesn’t deliver it anyway.

And yet many professional men have facial hair.
Your argument is quite the opposite though.
Woman - bare face ❌
Man - bare face ✔️

it’s almost like it’s arbitrary nonsense.

I honestly would not have the energy to be offended by this comment. I know full well I look better and brighter and fresher with hair and make up done...,that's why I do it.
as long as he doesn't expect it for his viewing pleasure and understands I scrub up for myself and not to impress him or other men.

Men have to shave. Most women/employers don't like the Castaway look.

This is very weird. Perfume on a small child? People who don’t wear make up don’t have friends? (Again is that all people who don’t wear makeup? Or just the female ones?)