AIBU to not rent a house to our relative?

Its not like she is a sibling or child/grandchild. I would decline.

When she and others whinge (and they will) explain that you still have the overheads to meet on the property and insurance to meet and had already committed to the works on properties, with the expectations of a full market value rent when calculating affordability. Its a business that has to wipe its nose and not a charity. Tell her the current market for buy to lets is more problematic than it has been in the past and you have to be tougher than you have been historically.

If you really feel you must rent to her, still insist on the contract/deposit and going through the agent if that is what you normally do, no preferential treatment in that respect for family as this is your business. But maybe offer her a couple of months at reduced rate to get her on her feet and thenthe rest as normal. Remember she needs to be in the area.

Good decision. Asking to rent at a discount is essentially asking you to pay part of her rent. I’m assuming she wouldn’t ask you just to hand her a few thousand pounds? It’s essentially the same thing.

Basically she wants you to pay her rent through your loss of income?! Let her pay her own rent.

I would say no , this will bring nothing but a headache

This.

She sounds like a trouble maker and she has a good salary she can find her own rental...

She's the type that would be reading the arse off you to family either way, and could well try to stiff you.
Her suggestion for free is wild.
If it causes a permanent fracture, consider it a win win.

I think you’re being generous asking opinions here!
No way, would I in your shoes, Let a property to this ‘relative’.
I might even leave it empty for longer than necessary, haha!

It’s too bad section 21s are going away because, I would rent to her at the lower end of market rate if section 21s were still around. It would mean I could easily evict her if things didn’t work out. I do wonder if her marriage being toxic caused some of her comments and unpleasantness. Plus, if I didn’t, then it would kind of prove her points?

But with no section 21s allowed in the UK now, it would be too risky, so you’re not unreasonable to just say no.

If you rent to her she is still going to disapprove of you being landlords. Perhaps she'll feel even more resentment because she is indebted to you. If she can afford the market rent for your property she can rent similar from someone else. If she can't afford the market rent, the family members who think you should subsidise her can help her out.

I wouldn’t rent to her at all, and certainly not rent free.

No way. She’ll deliberately get into arrears and can you imagine how difficult it would be to get her out?

This 💯
She reaps what she sows !

Definitely not, they’ll pressure you to reduce the rent and you’ll never get rid of her. And that’s before we’ve addressed the irony of them lecturing you for having rental properties… until they need one!

Just tell her the works will be going on for a while… hopefully she’ll need somewhere sooner rather than later

Absolutely not.
I wouldn't want to have dealings like that with someone so comfortable being a rude opinionated person.
It is not your job to house her.
Any pushback from it, tell your husband to deal with it.
I would start keeping your business a lot more private.

Some relatives and friends can be the most difficult people to deal with.
My friend was pressurised by her husband to allow his sister and family use a holiday home she inherited.
They were very very careless and the row it caused was awful.
It really tested her marriage.
Her husband was taken aback by her fury as she is a calm person.
It will never be loaned again and she has told the rest of her inlaws this, because of his sisters behaviour, when they asked shortly afterwards to use it.
This was her happy place growing up and she felt huge pressure from her husband to say yes.
Never again.
Not worth it.
I havd loaned our holiday home to my best friend regularly, no one else.

Gosh it must be so tempting to reply to the family pushing this "she has always been horrible to us so would be a nightmare tenant"

Short answer…. No!

After 25 years in this business I can promise you that no good deed goes unpunished. Literally every time I see a landlord do this it backfires and, despite my better judgement and knowing this, I tried to help my PIL before Christmas and they currently live in one of my mothers rentals and that’s all gone to shit as well. A great reminder to me to follow my own advice and never waiver on it!

Don’t do it, however hard you think it is now and however much grief you will take it will be infinitely less grief than doing it and it going wrong will buy you.

Absolutely not.
You will never get rid of her and she will become more entitled.

Say you don't mix business and family as you don't want to fall out!

Also remember that no good deed goes unpunished.

Fuck that, you'll NEVER get rid of her. Shell end up rattling around your brain more than is comfortable OP.

Those family members who protest. Tell them to house her if they're that bothered.

2 birds with one stone opportunity this. You get to say no to her AND she'll probably never speak to you again.

Wins all round IMO.

My thought process would go...

No (for your reasons).

But the children, so maybe.

But not at a discounted rate when you could have someone else paying full rent, especially given her previous comments.

But how likely is it that she'd default on rent, or pay late and expect you to just suck it up? Be lenient? You're family, after all, and you know what she thinks of landlords...

So, back to no.

Of course NO! She’s a cunt to you. It’s really that simple.

Don’t do it! After pressure from family we rented our rental to a niece & her partner. It was a disaster. They thought rent was ootional as we are family. We no longer speak to her.

Absolutely no way should you rent to her. Sounds like a total nightmare and a headache waiting to happen, much worse than if you just don’t rent to her.

If you have a choice between guilt and resentment, always choose guilt!

I agree.

And you are already the bad guy before this even started, from the comments you have from both the would be renter and your other relative.

She opened her rental offer negotiations at free - even if she said it was a joke. Then mentioned at a discount.... I think that means than any discount - which would mean she was paying more than free - wouldn't ever be good enough.

She thinks you can easily afford it and therefore you owe her.. and the other relative is encouraging this.. .so they both think if they lean on you, make you feel guilty, you will cave to avoid their disapproval and the flak back they will kick up. But if she had to pay anything, she would still regard it as more than free and that she was subsidising your income and still think that you owe her because of it.

But as the above pp noted... they are already disapproving of you, being rude to your face... and it sounds like they will find things to complain about even in a free house as they think all landlords are exploitative.

So although you may fear the backlash, you're already experiencing it... so you have nothing to lose.

You could help the family out in other ways.. one off help that you are willing to offer and that doesn't tie you into a long term, disadvantageous and difficult business relationship.

Definitely never rent to family! My sister rented to my brother and treated him shockingly (I’m not saying you would) but had she rented to anyone else she’d not got away with renting out substandard housing!