Daughter (13) has pierced own ears

Yeah I was also confused. If I wanted more piercings as a teenager I just asked mum and she took me to the tattoo parlour because all she was concerned about was that they were done properly 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’d be so cross if my daughter did her own piercings instead of having them done properly.

We all did stupid shit like this at her age, didn’t we? It’s just part of being a teenager. I really don’t think it’s worth an extreme reaction. On the plus side, she probably doesn’t have any earlobe left to pierce and cartilage is considerably harder to self-pierce. Although it might be worth showing her some photos of shattered cartilage and keloid scars so she’s definitely put off the idea of DIY piercings in any more adventurous locations!

I did mine by holding two ice cubes on lobe and pushed stud through. I can’t remember if I cleaned stud, it was a long time ago. I am still here to tell the tale.

Jesus OP. You made her clean the bathroom for that? Why?

My DD(12) pierced her own septum about 6 months ago, with a piercing kit from blooming Amazon. I eyerolled, made her take it out and binned the £20 kit and fabulous sterile piercings it came with.
I think you over reacted a bit, it's not the end of the world and any infection is her problem in terms of it being sore.

Same!

Haha, she sounds brilliant to be fair. And you’ve overreacted. Teenagers have been doing dodgy home piercings since the dawn of time.

My nan and her sisters all did each other’s ears with a darning needle, and that was c. 1930 😁

I pierced my own tongue age 18 so you need to take a massive chill.

I’d be thinking our relationship must have broken down that she didn’t feel she could come and ask me for the third piercing and be trying to build that with open communication setting clear boundaries for the future - no more home piercings because my job is to keep my child safe. Your actions are just going to break the relationship further and build a wall between you! (Mum of 3 teens aged 14-18).

We want to teach our daughters their bodies, their choice

punishment for something as simple earrings, let's hope shes not got any hidden ones for the sake of your health

I wasnt allow pierced ears till I was out the house and an adult
by 15 I had both nipples and belly button outta sheer spite 😂 Yes places didn't check my age

Ears finally done at 19 after multiple face peircings had i been simply allowed my ears, freedom to express myself i can almost grantee id had less as I wouldn't be feeling like I had no control

All pericings can be removed too, she young! Plus she also saved money! 😂

I think she was already punished - that must have hurt somewhat!

A few questions to clarify- are you angry with how it looks, or that she could have hurt herself? Did she ever mention wanting to do this before? Is her fashion pretty ‘alt’ otherwise too? It’s probably just a phase and reacting to it could be very tricky at her age.

Gently, if you just don’t like how it looks (she didn’t directly disobey you or something) I think your punishment is a bit harsh. I pierced my own seconds and thirds around her age (fire and rubbing alcohol to sanitize instead of antibac gel lol) after asking my mom to take me to get them done, she said no so I said I’d just do them myself and did while she was at work. When she got home she just rolled her eyes and told me to keep them clean. Looking back I appreciate she made it clear she didn’t like my style of wearing mostly black, cat eyes, dying my hair etc but after ~12 yo or so she didn’t try to make me do or wear anything I didn’t like. By end of uni I’d taken out the extra piercings and was a fan of sundresses and minimal makeup!

Make sure she understands DIY’ing other piercings is not likely to go smoothly like an earlobe. If an upper cartilage gets infected they may have to amputate part of her ear, belly buttons are very hard to keep clean, tongues are very dangerous etc.

another here not sure why such a huge overreaction. She thought about the cleanliness and improvised. Already has 2x piercings, what's one more?!
My neice pierced my sons ear when I wasn't there. He was 9, right at the end of the summer hols before camp. His ear didnt fall off. He is fine.

When I was younger one of my friends pierced her own tongue and put a butterfly back earring in it. Now THAT was silly...

And do you know what lesson has been learnt by her? To not come to you because you’ll go batshit crazy and massively punish her.

is this really a hill you want to die on? Teenagers do stupid shit because they are teenagers. And one day she might do something stupid and dangerous that is far worse than piercing her ears and she might need to come to you for help.

and also what the fuck does cleaning the bathroom have to do with piercing ears unless she’s covered said bathroom in blood and it looked like a crime scene?

massive overreaction

Did the same thing around same age or younger 😬 Also didn't even use a needle just forced an earring in 🤦🏼‍♀️
Mum didn't want me having more than one hole so think I did 2 extra in ine ear, and 3 in the other.
She said "Don't come running when it gets infected!"
It didn't and they are all good 30 odd years later 😂

She pierced her ear.

I don't think it's the end of the world but why would you impose pretty drastic punishments when she's already got piercings?

I think you're being unreasonable. I'd be making sure my kid knew about clean technique while doing piercings and go over aftercare.

I suspect massive over reactions like that are exactly why she’s done it herself and hid it from you. A serious chat about why doing it was unsafe and at most being made to take them out would have been plenty

Massive over reaction. If you over react like this you're leaving yourself nowhere to go when she does something serious.

I'd have checked she still wanted them, cleaned them, sterilised some decent earrings & kept an eye on them for a few weeks.

I did 3 of my own. Have survived the last 40 odd years or so. My teen daughter has also done one of hers. It really isn’t the end of the world; more a right of passage.

So it was one less job for the OP to do?

What's with the bathroom clean?

You have completely overreacted.

A piercing down below.

Same, I'm actually shocked at the responses here!

I have an 11 year old. She does have her ears pierced (once!) but I'd be horrified by this 😂

What is a lady Jane??