Should I ask my DS and his girlfriend for money

Depends really. I know quite a few people with bi-polar who work, although it's certainly challenging for them.

Agree. I'm all for stopping benefits for the lazers and the piss takers, but don't want people with genuine health problems to end up suffering.

You can’t really blame the OP for that though. I’m sure she’d rather not have bipolar.

Fucking hell I must have missed a page or two. What a sorry story.

Thing is we need a fool-proof way to weeding out the genuine to the chancers. Until that happens I don't want anyone in need, genuine need to suffer because of others ruining it. Tbh, am not sure that's possible.

The OP is on benefits too. She has bipolar. Which let's face it has modelled to her son that you don't actually need to work.

Because no government has the balls to stand firm, say one thing one week...
those claiming it's happening to them shout loud.
U turn the next.

Most sensible people could see it happening, the slippery slope, as with many things that are so wrong in this country...but have no voice....it'll only get worse.

This. OP will end up with anxiety with the stress of supporting two adults. What a coincidence that they both suffer with such crippling anxiety that they can’t work. Like your child, I have anxiety and have to crack on.
There will be a baby soon.

It sounds like you're being taken for a complete mug! You must know at least whether your son has so much anxiety that he can't possibly do any type of work? If he has, then tell him to seek urgent medical help. Sounds like you don't think so, by your use of 'apparently'.
Do you want the girlfriend and her cats living with you? If not, tell her she has to move elsewhere. Maybe back to her parents? But it's not really your concern where she goes, just that . Otherwise you'll have them living with you for ever more!
And of course they should both be contributing to their keep! I'd turn the wifi off in the day time too. Don't enable their behaviour- it's your home and you're the boss of it, so set whatever rules you feel are appropriate. if they don't like the rules, they can leave.. and hopefully they will.

Everyone probably feels anxious at times.
When I feel anxious I tell myself that I only have one life and I get in and start doing something. The feeling of anxiety is worrying but it is not going to kill me. I feel uncomfortable, yes, but I get on with life.

Being unemployed is an excellent way to bring on an anxiety attack. Worry about not learning skills, not contributing to society in a financial way nor in a useful way.

Charge your DS and his girlfriend rent and also insist that they have to be working at a charity, volunteering, for one day a week, and putting up signs advertising as dog walkers, cat minders and feeders, and house sitters.

They oculd also do their RSA, start some laundry services or house cleaning jobs and look into some study at the local tech.

Try to facilitate them doing more to help themselves out of unemployment.

You are so naive seriously what are your bills? They should be paying 2/3 of them, council tax, gas, electric, water. Your DS is and his GF sound like they taking the piss out of you. Tell tell this arrangement is temporary you can’t seriously want to live for years with 2 adults who pay peanuts in your own house.

And bad parenting. I would argue if you have a child with any problems a parent should work even harder at helping them cope with the world, not use it as an excuse to give up. Not easy, granted, but children need their parents to help because the parents won't be around forever.

I dont think the OP is going to come back. Hopefully she will take a hard look at what is happening in her household and make some changes but somehow I dont think so.

On some threads there are still people claiming benefits are very hard to claim, they arent given out willy nilly but clearly its rife. Add to that You Tubes telling you the answers to questions to ensure that you get what you want and you have benefits going up and up.

Its unacceptable that we give us on our young people and allow them to make a choice not to work. For long? Next year, forever??

The issue with MH issues is that they arent visble. With a broken leg its clear what has happened. With MH if you have the 'correct' answers you will get what you want. its just easier for the people managing the system to give it to you. After all its not their money and they dont want people kicking off.

I saw one of those Ambulance programmes the other night. There was a persistent caller who was messing around and calling 999 constantly. He used a couple of key words when he rang to ensure that he was a P1 and unfortunately the paramedic repeated them. When they got to him he messed around and turned them away. Next day he did the same thing. I am surprised that they allowed those words to stay in but I guess in the crowd who are calling 999 a lot you will get to know what you need to say.

Exactly. Work HELPS with my anxiety. It is one way of stopping the negative thoughts spiralling.

The OP's family should try it.

I am left leaning but I think it's fair to say whatever political stance we take, we don't like liars, and that's what people who fraud the system are.
Benefits are a safety net for those in need.

Wow. Yeah they would be out after this. They are taking the piss. Let them see what it costs to run a house.

Im sick of people using anxiety and ADHD as an excuse for being an asshole.

I resent the idea that you can't have 'real anxiety' if you can also hold down a full-time job. I currently need treatment for a stress-related ulcer but I won't be resigning and going on benefits because of it. This country is full of lazers.

Exactly, like my anxiety wasn’t real…

Because I know you can actually work with anxiety, depression, bi-polar disorder, autism. A tiny proportion are unfit for the work place. I suspect a much larger percentage just don’t want to work enough or are so navel gazing they have convinced themselves they can’t. One of the best treatments for anxiety is to consistently just do shit, even though it’s hard.

I have 'real anxiety' and yes it's crippling but you can still bloody work.

She has anxiety but basically moved in to a family home where she doesn’t really know any of you? I think someones pulling your leg.

They probably can afford alcohol, takeouts, cigarettes and vaping.

Eating, gaming, shagging.

Stop the tax payer's money to these freeloaders. I wonder if they'll manage to get a job then.

The trouble is, real anxiety is absolutely crippling. People like this result in the public being sceptical of anyone saying they can't work due to anxiety. Have you ever worked OP?