Toddler at nursery

OP you need to teach your child how to manage clothing as well.

I am obviously reading this differently to others but I’m getting the impression the OP is just not sure what the done thing is. I mean, I do have to work, my toddler has to go to nursery, so when I tried potty training she did have to go in with a lot of spare clothes and an explanation. As it transpired it didn’t work out and so I’ve paused it for a few weeks but I think most parents in the early stages of potty training feel a bit lost and like they don’t know what they are doing - I certainly did (do!)

I think the children who potty train very quickly are a bit older. I also think you need more days at home, it’s too much to expect of nursery. Mine were a bit older and I did it during the summer holiday so I was off work before they went back to childminder. I know not everyone gets this time, but I think you needed more than two days at home if you were expecting no accidents at nursery.

He very young. Give him time.

Nursery is an entirely different environment to home. Even well toilet trained reception age children at school still have accidents because they’re so busy and distracted.

You seem to want everyone to blame the nursery’s it’s really not a nursery issue. You need to be better at understanding how the different environments impact the toilet training and adjust what you do so that he has more chance of being successful at nursery. And you need to realise it’s going to take a lot longer than a few days. Your toddler is doing well. Help him to do well at nursery too. That’s your job and the nursery staff will support.

My two year old has been potty trained for three months and uses her spare clothes/underwear almost every nursery day.

They don't have an adult who instantly recognises the signs like at home, it's harder to get the attention of an adult and it's generally more distracting at nursery.

That said, your posts sound as if you're expecting nursery to do the training. only two days at home with you is no where near long enough. You have to train him properly yourself then send him to nursery and expect accidents for some time.

He just needs time, it’s easier at home because everything is familiar , it’s quieter and there’s 1:1 support. plus it sounds like he’s not fully emptying his bladder if he’s going so frequently? So nursery might take him but he has an accident after?

He’s doing so well keep persevering and see how he is out and about eg soft play or similar too.

You could ask nursery how they are managing it to check it’s compatible with what you’re doing.

Toddler issue. Get him in the same at home as he is at nursery I.e trousers on! Skip pants for a few days if you’re following the Oh Crap method. Check if nursery set up is the same (mine only had a toilet in, so I sent a potty in and worked on using the toilet at home). Five days is nothing, better to take some time off work if you or your partner can.

It's only been 5 days.

not nursery's issue.

Accidents happen
he may be busy playing and realising too late he needs the toilet
your on hand to take him straight to the toilet, your basically watching him waiting for it nursery can't hang round him

Honestly, I wouldn’t have used Oh Crap/bare bum method if I was only going to have DC at home with me for only 2 days as that isn’t anywhere near enough time for them to start the potty training naked and then learn to manage it whilst wearing clothes, which nursery will obviously require. And whilst nursery can/should support potty training they won’t do it for you, especially when you’re expecting them to essentially start from scratch because you’ve used the one method they can’t follow.
That said he is making progress overall so I wouldn’t go back to nappies. Instead I’d cancel any plans you might have this week to stay in and boot camp potty train using a method where he wears clothes. He will get there.

I think it's important for you to understand what the set up is at nursery. Is he using a potty there or the toilet? Can he access whichever on his own or does he have to have a member of staff with him to give him the potty / take him to the toilet / lift him onto the loo?

If you're at home and he says he needs the potty / looks like he needs it, I expect you're getting it sorted straight away, as anyone would. At nursery they probably can't do it instantly, they might be dealing with another child / supervising something that can't be left etc, and the small delay is probably enough that he can't hold on - especially if he's engrossed in something and only realising when he's desperate which is entirely normal.

So long as nursery are doing the same method as you, so it's not confusing him, he'll get there. But it's probably going to take longer at nursery because of all the distractions.

5 days at home is not even close to being trained enough for nursery

Judging from your replies so far, this is definitely a you issue.

It's not really nursery's job to potty train your child though. The can support once well established at home but they cant be expected to be able to give it as much attention as the parent would. Nursery is full of distractions, he is wearing clothes, playing, noise etc. You need to train him to the point that he is reliable when wearing clothes as he would in nursery. Even then you have to expect some accidents as the staff have lots of children to deal with many of which will also be potty training.

Why on earth would it be nursery’s “issue”?
You need to put the work in to get him wearing bottoms, he can’t run around nursery naked from the waist down.

What part is surprising you? You are coming across very argumentative. It's not nursery or your child's fault it's yours for sending him back when he's not fully toilet trained.

I think you need to get him to the stage of being potty trained whilst wearing clothes first, before potty training at nursery. Why is it that he isn’t wearing clothes at home, is it because he can’t take them down himself, or he will have an accident of wearing them?

Well if it was enough then he wouldn't be having accidents at nursery several times a day?

Doesn't sound like enough, does it?

Honestly I'm surprised you're surprised he's having accidents. He's not trained at home where there's 1-1 attention and few distractions and he's not even at the stage of wearing clothes so of course he's going to struggle in a busy setting with lots of distractions and the added extra difficulty of wearing clothes.

1, five days is nothing
2, he has clothes on at nursery
3, the staff have many children to look after they can not toilet train your child (in the early stages)
4, he will be a lot more distracted at nursery
5, toilet training is more than offering the potty every 5 mins and catching it (if you are lucky!) he needs to learn to recognise he needs to go, ask for help and hold it until he is on the toilet. He will need to be developmentally ready.

Keep up the good work at home and when he’s more secure start sending him nappy free to nursery.