To think all these mothers bragging about working full time are just using their own mothers as unpaid childcare?

I work a 55 hour week, and have no family support, ever. No baby sitting, no childcare. Just me and my husband... oh and all 4vkids are homed educated too. So no actually, I'd say if you can't work full time you are lazy. (And I had my first baby at 19 so not hugely difficult situation to you)

Just tell them they don't got the same close relationship with their children as you do. I know many kids who aren't close to their parents because they never spend any time with them. I respect childfree people because they can focus on what they like without having children suffering from lack of bonding with selfabsorbed career parents who treat them like a burden.

All the nurseries around here are 7:30-6. You don’t have to use those hours but that’s what they offer.

No family near me at all.

Paid childcare here.

I don’t know anyone whose parents looked after their children while they were working.

Sounds like you are just annoyed because a few people you know have parents that help and you don’t.

You’re missing the point of what I and plenty of others have said. It is not just mothers who benefit from childcare!!!!

OP you seem to think that it is almost entirely the mother’s responsibility to organise childcare. Your outrage should be directed to the fathers who outsource everything to their wives/partners. Those who put their career success down to being very driven and disciplined, while failing to acknowledge their wives/partners organising their lives for them.

BTW in 2026 no one cares about whether you’re married or not when you have kids.

I don't know anyone who used parents as childcare. Nanny (for younger DCs + wraparound) + short day in nursery (once DCs are around 3) seemed the most popular option among my friends

I used paid childcare - Creche near work initially (drop off from 8am, collect by 6pm), and afterschool club nearer home once in primary (collect by 6pm…but at the end of the commute). DH did school drop off as his commute was faster and easier than mine (he cycled, I depend on public transport in rush hour), and I did collection in the evenings.

I also had an au pair for 3 years when DH was overseas 50% of the time, who did drop to school daily and one evening collection a week, which helped a lot.

I know very very few friends or colleagues who had family care available. Most depended fully on paid childcare.

Of course they didnt do it on their own, they did it with THE CHILDRENS FATHERS.

In my circle there's very few women who gave up their job to look after children.
Most families I know both parents work full time. But thats not what I asked.
Im asking why your judgement of the supposed use of grandparent help is aimed squarely at the mothers, not the fathers.
It reads a lot like you are unhappy with your own situation, and projecting that onto others.

I'm guessing that these are people you know personally, rather than working mothers in general?

Who calls you a piece of shit and lazy?

OP I think you sound incredibly bitter and jealous. I’ve been in the workforce for years and I’ve not once heard anyone bragging about working. What kind of conversations are you having that this even is a topic of discussion?
You made your choices, it’s a bit off to now be bitter at other people just because they made different choices. I don’t imagine anyone is bragging at all, it’s likely just your interpretation because it’s a sore point for you. You need to take responsibility for your feelings - no one has made you feel like shit, you’ve allowed yourself to feel
this way.

Ridiculous. My mum died before my first child was born. No paternal grandmother either. Absolute click bait.

I think the real issue is fathers bragging about how hard they’ve worked to advance their careers, while neglecting to add that their wives have basically organised their lives for them and taken care of everything at home so they can focus only on their jobs.

Nursery hours are 7:30-6pm, it's the easiest time to work full time! 😂School it gets harder, but as long as there eis breakfast club and after school club then it's still do-able

I had a full time career including studying for and taking professional exams jn my 30s and not one single day of childcare provided by anyone other than nursery or school.

Yes a lot of people will have family help but a lot of people who only work part time have family help as well. I don't think you can decide any woman who has succeeded to have children's and a career has only done so because they have had free childcare

I have an answer - don’t give up your job to look after your children, unless you want to.

I work, my mum worked, every mum I know works.

Not really bothered if anyone “expects” me not to. I want to work, so I do.

First post nails it. So did I. My mum used to look after my son for one week in the summer holidays. Her choice for which I was grateful. But I wouldn't say it was exploitation given I paid for childcare for the rest of the year!

My DD works full time. She doesn't brag about it. I do some childcare but I also work full time (I don't brag about it either!) I'm not exhausted. In fact I'm typically less tired than DD. So tbh, I've no idea what you're talking about.

yabu and talking bs
All of my single friends have worked ft and used nurseries because their own parents are still working.
Me and DP both worked full time and have no family support whatsoever let alone an exhausted mother.
If you are unhappy with your life choices or feel you should be working more, that’s on you. Stop projecting your insecurities on to other families.

I’m sure it’s already been asked, but don’t fathers benefit from childcare as much as mothers?

As an old-fashioned and probably very religious family that believes that abortion is murder, I would have expected them to step up and provide you with childcare for the baby you had at 15.

Why aren't you angry with your parents rather than directing your anger at teen mothers whose family did help them with childcare.

Most nurseries finish at 3? Are you just thinking about those attached to schools. Most that are for the purpose of childcare finish much later as the purpose is to enable people to work. There’s lots of nurseries that fit round work (although sometimes getting back in time can be pressured)