4 children, no happy Mother’s Day

Well my son went out after lunch and returned home with a card and a bar of chocolate which I was so pleased with.
Dh looked awkward and said ‘oh crap was that this week?

Ds then asked his sisters what they had bought and they said they thought Dad would have bought something so Dh apologised saying he didn’t realise it was today, he then asked me if I was upset or mad at him which I thought was strange, I said I was a bit disappointed and he said ‘do you want me to go out and get you something quick? So I reminded him it was Sunday and he said well do you want something from the co-op?
I joked we could do with some bananas and he said ‘what about a bottle of wine to cheer you up and suddenly I thought of @trufflerufflesuggestion of sitting on a park bench eating a sandwich in the pouring rain except this time I pictured me sat there with a bottle of wine and decided actually I’m ok.

I did go out and buy the cushions though.

Ahh that makes sense, the girls are a bit young to t ink about sorting without prompting from dad, boys don’t always think of these things

Just feeling a bit unappreciated about that.
Usually I get a card or some flowers which dh would have bought with them and always make the effort for Father’s Day but this year nothing.
I thought one of them might have uttered the words Happy Mother’s Day.

I haven’t said anything, I know they know it’s Mother’s Day, they watched me buy and post my own mums gift.

It’s not the same, Mother’s Day to me is a chance to say thank you to my mum for everything she does, I don’t want to ask for that as I am not entitled to anything but as a mum of 4 I thought just one of them might have given me a thought as usually I get a card or something but I will get over it.
I put so much effort into making things special for everyone else for birthdays and Christmas and Father’s Day but it’s only because I usually do it all.

Eldest is a boy but the others are girls.

The 10 year old has even written it on her calendar and mentioned yesterday to me that it was going to be Mother’s Day so it’s not that nobody remembered.
They are all watching a film together in the lounge while I
run around doing everything for them as they call out for me to get lunch ready and bring drinks in.
A home made card from one would have been nice but just the words or some acknowledgement would have been nice instead of just no mention as it’s just another day.

Oooh an ACOTAR fan 🤩.

Yes - All on your husband. Especially if they don't have money of their own. Did the 13yr old say anything? The oldest should have made you some breakfast in bed, at least. Hubby could have bought them ingredients to do it.

I can't believe you put up with this

Glad you are pleased with the minimum crumbs you ended up with. And you'll probably still knock yourself out on father's day.

Unless your children are adults this is all on your DH.

Genuine question but why? It's a made-up day that means nothing.

I'd be annoyed if my son ignored my birthday but Mother's Day - meh.

God, why do women feel the need for this level of martyrdom?!
No one’s making you run around like a slave for them!

Genuine question but why? It's a made-up day that means nothing.

I'd be annoyed if my son ignored my birthday but Mother's Day - meh.

Well my son went out after lunch and returned home with a card and a bar of chocolate which I was so pleased with.
Dh looked awkward and said ‘oh crap was that this week?

Ds then asked his sisters what they had bought and they said they thought Dad would have bought something so Dh apologised saying he didn’t realise it was today, he then asked me if I was upset or mad at him which I thought was strange, I said I was a bit disappointed and he said ‘do you want me to go out and get you something quick? So I reminded him it was Sunday and he said well do you want something from the co-op?
I joked we could do with some bananas and he said ‘what about a bottle of wine to cheer you up and suddenly I thought of @trufflerufflesuggestion of sitting on a park bench eating a sandwich in the pouring rain except this time I pictured me sat there with a bottle of wine and decided actually I’m ok.

I did go out and buy the cushions though.

Instead of feeling resentful and sorry for yourself I would make changes to make your children more appreciative and grateful, and your husband more considerate.

They should be excited to do something for you for Mother’s Day.

Just feeling a bit unappreciated about that.
Usually I get a card or some flowers which dh would have bought with them and always make the effort for Father’s Day but this year nothing.
I thought one of them might have uttered the words Happy Mother’s Day.

Instead of feeling resentful and sorry for yourself I would make changes to make your children more appreciative and grateful, and your husband more considerate.

They should be excited to do something for you for Mother’s Day.

rather than get into it in the heat of the moment - I waited til the following March. And sent this a few years back. It worked.

Whilst I have your attention….

It is the first of March.
In March every year is Mother’s Day. In Jan every year is my birthday.

Now that you are all 16 & over (can marry, join army etc! 😀) I want to lay out what I think are reasonable expectations on these 2 days.

I would like cards from you collectively or individually to arrive on or before said day from wherever you are in the world. Moonpig is your friend in this. Your phone and diarised advance reminders will also help you.

Anything else is above & beyond & thoughtfulness is what is of value not cost - but it is the thought and planning - as I do for your birthdays, Xmas and so on - that I think is a minimum requirement. Ideally again that should be given on the day in question. Sometimes of course things happen beyond our control but in general that’s something to aim for.

I think you all know the dimmunition in emotional value of something is handed over weeks later.

It should also be something you bring into your future significant relationships.

Last Mother’s Day I did not receive a card from one of you and it really really upset me. It’s not how you were raised. You all have of course given me many thoughtful beautiful cards and gifts loads of times over the years but last Mother’s Day was a bit of a low.
Lots & lots of love, Mum xxx