To get DD out of a rave

I would go at least to check there is something happening. If there is id try mot to go looking snd embarrass her. Id also try to gauge liklihood of being able to get home from there

Outdoor raves used to be called "free parties" in the 90's and there were loads of them. When I was that age we would often take a few cars and a group of friends and hang out somewhere pretty remote until late (moors, woods, coast) but it wasn't a rave.

I'm glad my parents couldn't see my location! I think my mum probably didn't sleep until I was home but she was always very chill about it. Probably because she couldn't sit around looking at my location and freaking out.

I’d be in the car already going to check. Chances are she’s fine but I’d still go because you hear so many horrible stories these days to me it’s not worth the risk. I’d rather embarrass my kid and have them huff for a while than sit not knowing

Raves in woods would be a logistical nightmare. Power for one is an issue. Sound also carries if it is an outdoor event and it would have been shut down. Plus it’s the wrong time of year for outdoor events. It’s more likely the location tracking is wrong but I wouldn’t take the risk.

Of course they are bloody children. Don’t be ridiculous

No, as far as OP knew her dd was going to be at a party in a city, not in the woods. She assumes she’s at a rave but doesn’t actually know this. And for the record, raves don’t tend to happen in the woods.

A lot of “cool mums” on here needlessly antagonising the OP. @TheSassyHedgehog

OP can you update this thread to let us know what happened please? Hope tonight works out for you both.

She does know why she would be there, she's at a rave! I get that she's young but calling her a child to make a point is silly. 17 year olds are not children.

I won’t derail the thread with stories of my own, but I really wish my parents had risked embarrassing me to get me out of a really awful situation that happened when I was 16. It would have saved me a lifetime of living with the trauma.

Jesus. A 17 year old child is in the middle of nowhere in the woods. The OP has no idea why she would be there or who she is with.

I can understand your worry, especially since you know what goes on at raves, but I think it would be ‘social suicide’ if you turn up in front of all her classmates and friends because you’re worried she’ll get cold etc.

My eldest is 9, so I can’t even pretend to completely understand your worry however I’m sure it’s huge.

I think you will just have to trust that she’s sensible enough to be there. Maybe next time, make sure she tells you where she’s going and offer to pick her up at a certain time so you know she’s safe.

FWIW my 17yo son wouldn’t be allowed to do this and had a strict collected by a parent at 1am rule. Once he was 18 we relaxed this to 2am and he could get an Uber back if with friends.. I never slept until he was back and would have been having kittens if he wasn’t where he was supposed to be so I understand how.stresssful it is.

Leave her be, she’s with friends. Location sharing isn’t always a good thing. Don’t embarrass her by showing up.

I would actually ring her. If her phone has signal it might alert her to your text.

If he gets there and there’s a party going on then that’s fine, he can retreat and wait to see if she texts asking to be picked up.

Happy Mother’s Day! Kids!!

Personally I’d go. She may be in woodlands but you don’t know if there’s a party there. That should be pretty obvious as you get there. If there’s no rave, why is she there?

If you ever find yourself in this situation with a child of your own, come back and tell me this is ‘normal’ and that you’re completely fine with it.

It might be something that you yourself did, and I’m sure the OP’s dd is fine, but it’s not normal for a 17yo child to be out in the woods at 2am.

I nderstand this is stressful , but I am not sure there is much you can do. I would absolutely not jump in the car what would be the point ? When are you expecting her home ?

Hmm, personally I disagree. I would text her just to check she’s ok and let her know that you can pick her up if she needs it. Depending on how far away she is I might be inclined to drive out there if you get no response to the text. Just to see if there is in fact an event going on at that location.

Yabu sorry - shes 17, this is normal xx

Check there is in fact a rave there. She could be in trouble. If there is a rave text her to ask if she needs a lift home after.

Times have changed. I was a raver and not one I went to was outdoors in the woods lol. Always in a nightclub or at least a venue with a large warehouse/barn etc. fair enough I stand corrected 😅

The locations are not always that accurate. Dh was worried about me the other evening as it looked as if i was in the middle of woods, when i was actually in Bath city centre!