Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to leave tonight after husband's texting and driving tantrum?

144 replies

Justinbimber · 14/03/2026 18:10

My husband is slamming around the house and doing his aggressive “tidy up” routine because I said he shouldn’t text and drive.

We were in the car with his son (6). I said “if you keep texting and driving you’ll end up with 3 points, or worse”

He replied he always did it and why mention it now? Then he said it’s alright for me because I don’t drive so I can relax and go on my phone whenever I want.

He then threw his phone at the dashboard, and drove 50+ in a 30 zone for about 10 minutes. I was gripping my seat

He already drives under the influence of cannabis (everyday). I will not get in the car with him on these days.

Aibu to pack my bags and leave tonight? I’m sick of it all, whenever I bring up a slight criticism (?) it ends with these escalated moods and tension. His son is clinging to me since we got home which is unusually for him

OP posts:
crazeekat · 15/03/2026 03:25

Get out of there. And tell son’s mum what he is doing with the son also.

Dinkydash · 15/03/2026 02:46

He has red flags for DV. Leaving is a dangerous time for women. It's not unreasonable but it can definitely be unsafe. I'd let him go to work then pack up and go.

ThatBlackCat · 15/03/2026 02:43

Please, please watch this and have your 'D' H watch this too (30 mins but worth it):

ThatBlackCat · 15/03/2026 02:39

I wouldn't be someone that took cannabis at all, let alone every day. I also wouldn't be with anyone who texts and drives. He's an irresponsible pos isn't he. What do you see in that turd? Why haven't you tipped off the police about him DUI? He could kill someone! Same as texting and driving, one second and he collides and wipes out someone. Don't have that on your conscience. Contact the police and leave the violent and irresponsible druggie.

askmenow · 15/03/2026 02:30

Leave! This will not get better.

Bollixtothat · 15/03/2026 02:23

So you don’t normally mind his drug driving ? You only mention it now because he’s angry. You reap what you sow so my sympathy remains with the innocent 6 year old child caught up in this shitstorm.

researchers3 · 15/03/2026 02:14

SunMoonandChocolate · 14/03/2026 18:13

First post nails it OP! You'd be mad to stay with a man like this. I'd also report him to the police for driving under the influence of drugs.

This!! His poor son! You have a choice to walk away, he doesn't. Please report him.

Starrystarrysky · 15/03/2026 02:10

I had a friend who was killed by someone driving under the influence. She had a high powered career, just engaged and actively planning her wedding. We'd been so happy for her when she met her fiancé. All ended when someone like your husband decided to get in the car. Leave him and report him OP. This isn't a 'small criticism' he is literally endangering lives.

PrincessofWells · 15/03/2026 01:59

Zebedee999 · 14/03/2026 18:59

Jeez you're allowing a druggie to drive? Bad enough you're with a druggie but allowing him to drive is unforgiveable. Report him to the police next time and dump the loser.

Your post is really offensive. Op is not responsible, legally or morally, for anyone's behaviour except her own.

My 6ft 4in boyfriend did this once - and there is no way I could have stopped him physically, or with words.

OtterlyAstounding · 15/03/2026 01:36

Oh yes, it would definitely be massively unreasonable to leave the dangerous, irresponsible, druggie driver, who throws tantrums and deliberately endangers lives. How could you even think of leaving such a prince among men?

VoiceFromThePit · 15/03/2026 00:57

Please do not leave his son alone with this junkie drugged-up driver of a father

Horses7 · 15/03/2026 00:25

Don’t walk ….RUN!!!

elm26 · 15/03/2026 00:08

Leave before he kills you or the poor child or some other innocent person because it’s rarely them that end up dying when driving under the influence, it’s always some poor innocent person going about their day to day lives. Oh and I’d tell his son’s mum and also report him to the police for driving whilst on drugs and speeding. Absolute selfish wanker.

YourShyLion · 14/03/2026 23:59

Justinbimber · 14/03/2026 18:51

I clearly stated I do not get in the car with him when he’s under the influence

So you're protecting yourself bit how about every other unsuspecting person that has the misfortune to come across him?!!

Jossse · 14/03/2026 23:54

Texting and driving causes accidents… feel for you being with such a selfish man. Probably time to make plans to leave him as he could easily become a murderer soon

ClairDeLaLune · 14/03/2026 23:48

Justinbimber · 14/03/2026 18:51

I clearly stated I do not get in the car with him when he’s under the influence

But you said he does this every day? And you were in the car with him today.

Leave him for sure, and tell his son’s mum, and report him to the police.

Rachel2409 · 14/03/2026 23:43

What a dickhead, u deserve far better

ForNoisyCat · 14/03/2026 23:30

Justinbimber · 14/03/2026 18:10

My husband is slamming around the house and doing his aggressive “tidy up” routine because I said he shouldn’t text and drive.

We were in the car with his son (6). I said “if you keep texting and driving you’ll end up with 3 points, or worse”

He replied he always did it and why mention it now? Then he said it’s alright for me because I don’t drive so I can relax and go on my phone whenever I want.

He then threw his phone at the dashboard, and drove 50+ in a 30 zone for about 10 minutes. I was gripping my seat

He already drives under the influence of cannabis (everyday). I will not get in the car with him on these days.

Aibu to pack my bags and leave tonight? I’m sick of it all, whenever I bring up a slight criticism (?) it ends with these escalated moods and tension. His son is clinging to me since we got home which is unusually for him

Lady, get the hell out!

RunningJo · 14/03/2026 23:11

Justinbimber · 14/03/2026 18:51

I clearly stated I do not get in the car with him when he’s under the influence

“He already drives under the influence of cannabis (everyday). I will not get in the car with him on these days”

So surely on this basis you must do if it’s everyday?

He sounds like an immature selfish arse and of course you should leave him. I’d also tell the mother of his child and if she doesn’t report him, I would. Better still, both report him before he kills someone.

PollyBell · 14/03/2026 23:03

I cant beleive you need to ask and I would also work on what on earth you saw in him in the first place so you do go through a revolving door of whatever this is

Moros · 14/03/2026 23:02

He's an irresponsible, aggressive stoner. Yes, you should leave.

CarrierbagsAndPJs · 14/03/2026 22:59

Justinbimber · 14/03/2026 18:51

I clearly stated I do not get in the car with him when he’s under the influence

He already drives under the influence of cannabis (everyday). I will not get in the car with him on these days
But you also said he smokes every day. So you must.

Absolutely leave and divorce. Why would you stay with him?

ScrollingLeaves · 14/03/2026 22:59

I mistakenly thought the child was yours but please do tell his mother.

ScrollingLeaves · 14/03/2026 22:55

CornishPorsche · 14/03/2026 18:17

Yes, leave.

Also report his driving under the influence to police online via your forces 101 online service. Give them the number plate, his details and his routine ie driving to woke every day and via what route (or whatever he does when high). Let them pick him up if they can. It may not work but worth a go.

What a prick. When they are slamming objects around like this, the next step is hitting people.

Yes, do tell the police. Try to get him stopped and arrested and drug tested for his driving because after you leave him you’ll need this as proof that you don’t agree to your son veing in the car with him.

Flopsythebunny · 14/03/2026 22:48

Not only would I leave, I would also tell the child's mother

Swipe left for the next trending thread