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Original poster

AIBU to refuse to change the car battery given my caring duties?

162 replies

Kardelen · 14/03/2026 10:12

how easy is it to change car batteries?
we changed my dads one a few years back, but it was me, my husband and dad.
i remember it being very heavy, and also having a small electric shock midway.

at the moment, I have two young children im caring for, and my elderly parents, and also my husband who is unwell.
so my husband can’t help, it’s out the picture. But my dad also can’t help as he is elderly, chronic pain, breathlessness etc, but is eager for me to buy it and thinks he can do it alone.

he was gonna ask my brother, but as usual very reluctant and im the go to person. But this time I said I can’t do it, but feeling guilty.

am I being unreasonable of not wanting to do it? - only because I remember last time it was 3 of us and we struggled.

OP posts:
DavidRosesEyebrows · 14/03/2026 14:47

I can change a car battery myself, but I'd always get a garage to do it. Or Halfords at a push. You can also get mobile services that just come round to your house etc. Apart from anything, they take care of the disposal of the old one, which can be a right pain.

Sunset6 · 14/03/2026 14:46

Go to Halfords website, type in car registration, it will tell you what battery to buy, buy it and book them to come to your house and fit it next day, job done.

MrsStarskie · 14/03/2026 14:42

Car batteries are heavy the ones for diesels are usually a bigger capacity and heavier. You may have to stretch to reach the clamps.
The place where you service the car will do it for you. Better to use your usual workshop.

Shade17 · 14/03/2026 12:54

More often than not it’s an easy 10 min job, just look it up on YouTube to see how difficult it is for that particular car.

The problem with the likes of Halfords etc is that they rip you off massively, you’ll be paying well over the odds there.

rookiemere · 14/03/2026 12:34

If your DF can afford it, tell him there’s a time and a place to start using professional services and getting the experts at Halfords to do it seems very sensible.

Jellycatspyjamas · 14/03/2026 12:25

Caring duties or not, if you don’t know how to do it safely, pay someone to do it for you.

Kirridge · 14/03/2026 12:13

I can change car batteries, yes. It takes less than five minutes. The first time I did it I googled which terminal to disconnect first etc.
They weigh about 15kg which I can lift easily. The most annoying thing is disposing of the old battery, but I'd rather do this than pay someone to fit a battery.

However, if you cannot lift ~15kg, or use Google, or would have difficulty taking the old battery to the tip, then it is easy to pay someone to do it.

wombat1a · 14/03/2026 11:59

I'd open the bonnet and have a look first.

This is the type of thing we used to do ourselves in 10 mins but recently the engine bays of cars have become so complex I am loath to do it. For our smaller car (a Volvo V40) it was a case of watch a youtube video to see the process of disasembing everything over the battery and reassembling it - its a 90 minute job now with a wealth of different tools needed. Thats the 'easy' battery to get at, the other battery involves taking the front bumper off......

FrippEnos · 14/03/2026 11:55

It is very easy to change a car battery.
However getting rid of the old battery can be a nightmare, depending on the faciilities available to you.
Use a garage or halfords etc. as they will dispose of the battery as well.

ginasevern · 14/03/2026 11:54

@Kardelen Just go to Halfords, buy the battery and they'll fit it for you for free. If you haven't got a Halfords near you, KwikFit will do it usually without an appointment but they will charge you, but not that much. I can't believe you and your family are agonising over this.

mrbluebirdonmyshoulder · 14/03/2026 11:49

|Your post made me smile OP. I can't fathom why you wouldnt take the car into halfords for them to replace and fit the battery.

They do the same with bulbs and windscreen wipers too. It takes them 5 minutes coz they do it all the time.

BIossomtoes · 14/03/2026 11:49

Just pay to get it done. In fact outsource as much as your finances allow. You’ve got more than enough on your plate @Kardelen.

Tryanalogue · 14/03/2026 11:46

You must be very sensitive, to get a shock from a 12 volt battery.

Palpmoop · 14/03/2026 11:34

Book it in somewhere, it’s not that expensive, Halfords do it, your local garage will, I have never changed one, and as you’re dealing with so much right now and struggled last time, makes no sense to struggle through it again

DeathNote11 · 14/03/2026 11:33

My local, independent motor spares shop fit anything like batteries, wiper blades, bulbs etc that you buy there for free if they're not busy.

Tamtim · 14/03/2026 11:33

No, just no. You sound like you have enough on your plate. Take it to someone who knows what they’re doing. Your father is being unreasonable.

Imlyingandthatsthetruth · 14/03/2026 11:29

Miranda65 · 14/03/2026 11:27

Just do what every single other motorist would do, and go to a garage!

Except all of us who are more than capable of doing it ourselves, that is. Please don't speak for other people.

Miranda65 · 14/03/2026 11:27

Just do what every single other motorist would do, and go to a garage!

CornishPorsche · 14/03/2026 11:25

Find a local garage who have it in stock and they'll do it for you. Much easier.

Allthegoodhorses · 14/03/2026 11:24

The length of time taken to write that you could have it booked into Halfords or similar and got one fitted.

SixSevenShutUp · 14/03/2026 11:23

Easterbunnygettingawrapping · 14/03/2026 11:14

Dh has always sorted our cars out. Alone. It's a battery not a bloody engine.

The OP explained herself. Read it again. It's not War and Peace.

Easterbunnygettingawrapping · 14/03/2026 11:14

Dh has always sorted our cars out. Alone. It's a battery not a bloody engine.

kiwiane · 14/03/2026 11:12

Halfords or Kwikfit - you’ll then get a guarantee.

Catza · 14/03/2026 11:10

I always drive to Halfords. It's well worth £25 extra to not faff about with tools and disposal.

Fgfgfg · 14/03/2026 10:48

I've just gone on to the Halfords web site and once you've bought the battery it's between £35 - £50 (depending on the battery) to come out tomorrow, fit the new battery and dispose of the old one. You just book a slot online. Alternatively drive to your nearest one and they'll fit it today.